Contemporary women: If you can't give me what I want, what's the use of asking me?

We love each other as equals because we understand and respect each other. ]

1.

A few days ago, I had some arguments with a college classmate about the current situation of contemporary girls. Talking about the real experience in recent years, she asked me, "Do you think there are many or few girls like this now?"

I said, at least 90%!

I admit that I am biased against girls now, but it doesn't affect my judgment.

During my stay at home, as usual, my family didn't continue to urge me to get married. But the topic is always those, let me never get too close to those "messy" girls.

……

Their cognition of normal girls is still stuck in the statement of "xian" and "hui" twenty or thirty years ago.

I know what they mean. There's nothing wrong with looks. Just live together and find a "normal" one.

However, this is too optimistic.

I asked them, what was your standard at that time?

"I feel practical when I look at my eyes. I don't spend money indiscriminately. I feel that people are ok and can live together. At that time, people got married with nothing and wanted nothing. "

A marriage of mutual support and trust, how wonderful!

Suddenly remind of a ridiculous thing:

The bride price, originally a traditional ceremony in ancient China (only in China), as a custom, is just a formality ceremony to show good luck.

Different classes have different pressures. When the master marries, the servant marries, just like giving gifts on holidays. The gift is for peace of mind and harmony.

Now it is misinterpreted by those stupid love dramas, and the level of bride price means paying attention to women.

It is difficult to turn the essence of etiquette into a legal sale of people.

It's not easy for my parents to raise me. Whose parents are easier? It's not easy to know how much you care about yourself. Don't always use this to raise your social status, and then talk about "objectifying women" in this society.

Production, processing, packaging, price, auction, highest price?

Can we judge the future market with more men and fewer women and wait for appreciation?

I said,

Do you know the proportion of couples who have registered for divorce within three years?

I said,

Do you know what women say most often nowadays?

…

2.

Since last year, friends and former colleagues around me have introduced themselves to some girls.

In those years, I really couldn't convince myself to take the initiative. After posting the other person's WeChat, I didn't even bother to reply "Hello".

After staying at a friend's house for a few days before going home, the focus of anxiety gradually shifted from work to marriage. My friends and mother told me a lot of questions that need to be paid attention to after marriage, but I didn't remember a few words about girls in Otawa.

My friend said that you must get married before me.

I said, I may not get married

Now the girl's eyes, without that ability, really can't stand it

Maybe after that age, I like children and lovely things far more than women now.

In the words of many men of the same age, what they want more is just a hug.

Or, just the body itself.

Young people are obsessed with love and heart, more pure and naive; When I get older, I care more about love and sexual satisfaction.

Attitude towards marriage: life is too short and there are too many things to do. It is best not to get married, but for marriage itself, anyone can.

It is believed that the essence of love is time, and the only criterion for measuring feelings is tireless and long-term interdependence.

It is believed that kissing, hugging and making love are intimate relationships based on mutual trust, not love relationships that attract each other.

It is believed that any relationship should be based on equality, friendship, mutual respect and understanding (regardless of gender), rather than the trend of "calculating gains and losses, double standards of power and responsibility".

3.

A few years ago, Zhihu often talked about a topic:

Why are boys more and more unwilling to seriously chase a girl?

In such an era of equal rights between men and women and even women's privileges, there are still a large number of women who feel that,

As a woman, you just need to wait, choose and enjoy.

It seems that cakes all over the world will be handed to you one by one, and then you will happily choose the one that looks the most delicious.

This should be, as they often say, "let nature take its course."

Let nature take its course, isn't it? As the elders often say, "The three views are consistent, there is a common topic, and there is no question of who is chasing who." When feelings reach the level of mutual trust, they will naturally come together, and the rest is running in. "

There is no persistent pursuit, and there is no infatuation that must be there!

I am one step ahead of you out of respect for the lady, not because of how good you are.

The so-called equality, in addition to equality of power and responsibility, is more important.

4.

Since 20 13, the marriage rate in China has been declining continuously, with the data in 20 17 as low as 7.2%, and the marriage rate of young people aged 20-30 is 3 1. 1%, less than one third.

On the contrary, the divorce rate has been rising in the past five years, of which 73.4% were initiated by women because they were dissatisfied with their married life.

Many married men put all their feelings on children and work, thinking nothing more than raising children, and have little expectation for marriage itself.

More and more men, especially the middle-income class, don't care about it. They pursue greater success and don't care about getting married.

Even so, there are large-scale new media people, even many Bai Wan tubas, who instill those poisoned chicken soup into women for the sake of traffic.

Continue to raise women's standards for spiritual and material pursuits.

In fact, this kind of poisonous chicken soup is purely based on emotions. In the words of some female friends, it is "but people with a little brains will not take the bait."

But sadly, a large number of women repost comments every day.

They call themselves "women of the new era" and share the same view. They are nothing more than "I can have my own children, but I can't give them what I want." Why do I want you? "

They will never know the situation. Nothing in this world is taken for granted.

Including the "warning of having children" that everyone is teasing and satirizing now.

You don't want to have children, you don't have to, and men should respect it. This is your right and your freedom, but it is not a bargaining chip.

The same is true for men and women. Doing anything should be a state of willingness, out of one's own will, not kidnapped by public opinion, kidnapped by those who deserve it.

Pay each other, sacrifice each other, accommodate each other, don't pay, or be proud in the name of "paying"

This is the so-called "equal rights".

5.

In 20 18, the rise of short videos also catered to the content creation of "fan economy", and a number of "anti-poison chicken soup" copywriting appeared, which spread like a virus in the comment area of the whole network.

While satirizing the above-mentioned women, we should enlarge the problem to the whole female group.

Although there are more and more criticisms of some women now, there will not be much change in the next ten or twenty years.

Just like a popular saying on the Internet, "As long as women can listen, I will broadcast live #&; *? | & amp…"

Perhaps these so-called "mainstream values" will be slowly corrected when our generation is getting old and social problems are gradually emerging.

The huge population base also makes individual differences infinite.

The network makes people assimilate, the media makes people assimilate, and the mainstream concept makes people assimilate; But I always believe that some people have independent thinking ability, not standing in the environment, not standing in the crowd, not standing in the crowd, following their own hearts and having their own thinking.

I said 90% before, maybe, less than 90%. But pessimism is not a bad thing after all.

Black and white are wrong, and they will live together.

Perhaps it is this pessimism that makes me feel that ordinary girls in the eyes of ordinary people are more precious.