Funny and humorous copy

The stylist cuts the hair of the stars, the barber cuts the hair of others and the barber cuts my hair.

I know I have a bad temper. If you can't bear it, you must reflect on yourself and why others can.

Remember, no matter how strange we end up, a red envelope can go back to the beginning.

I went to the barber shop for a haircut the day before yesterday. Me: "Dude, help me get a haircut that I can find a girlfriend!" " "The stylist shouted at the room:" Boss, someone is coming to smash the venue! " "

5. Finding someone to pay back money is like unrequited love, and you will always feel embarrassed when you say it. When you get up the courage to say it, it becomes like confession. Maybe you don't even have friends.

6. I once played poker at home with my sister and my neighbor's friends. The scene was quiet and I suddenly farted loudly. Awkward. They didn't say anything. I want to ease the atmosphere and say, Little Sister, it's your turn (to play cards) ... My sister blushed and said, I can't let it out. ...

I bought a can of mimosa today. I'm not ashamed to go back. Go back and ask the boss. The boss said, "Maybe you bought this pot to lose face."

Eight. I turned down three more boys. I am really an excellent girl. It's a bit lonely to see their distant backs. I can only say sorry silently. I really can't afford your real estate insurance and financial management.

Walk back and forth around the car before going to work. My wife saw it and asked me, What are you doing? I sink a track: I said on the internet, check around the wheel before driving, maybe there will be small animals sleeping in the wheel! She slapped her face and said, what's there to check on the fucking bike?

10. Today is Qixi Valentine's Day. I asked my wife what I should give you. My wife says you can give me anything, as long as it's from you, I like it. I thought about it carefully and said to her, "I'll take you back to your mother's house!" " "

Eleven. Recently, my hands and feet are always cold, and online it is said that it is caused by kidney deficiency. Stick to fitness. After drinking Lycium barbarum for a while and making tea for a while, it still didn't work, so I gritted my teeth and paid the heating bill, and I got well.

12. A little boy made a mistake and said to his mother, You hit me so many times. I haven't changed. It's definitely useless to call. I think criticism should be useful. You should try it!

Thirteen. "Son, remember not to marry your wife and forget your mother in the future." "Don't worry, Mom, I will always be a mom."

14. "If my face value is in ancient times, I can hold up the whole brothel!" "You mean you look like a pillar?"

15. On the Dragon Boat Festival, a company distributed zongzi to employees. When the foreign employees came to work the next day, they said to the company's administrative manager as soon as they met, "The Chinese dim sum sent by the company yesterday was delicious, but the lettuce outside was a little hard."

16. When I woke up in the morning, I thought I had grown up, but the quilt was covered horizontally.

17. I heard that you spent tens of thousands of dollars on a pottery jar of the Western Zhou Dynasty. I excitedly ran to an expert for appraisal, and the expert solemnly said to you, "Which one is from the Western Zhou Dynasty?" It was clearly last week! "

18. Someone farted on the bus. A coquettish woman spat, "bah-bah-bah-". A man said, why, you spit out your shell after eating fart!

19. "I warn you, don't giggle at me when I'm angry. If you laugh, I will laugh with you, which makes me lose face. "

20. Other people's faces are destined to be seven points, three points by dressing up, one point by your face, and nine points by the filter. 2 1. A mosquito stung his left arm and drank a lot. You were awakened by a sting. At the moment when you waved your right hand to hit the mosquito, the mosquito said to you, "Your blood is flowing in my body!" " "

22. The meat that grows on the chest instead of the face is sensible meat.

At present, outstanding young pioneers in primary schools are probably the pinnacle of my political career.

24. In the past, my king didn't play well and my friends always scolded me. Then I practiced hard for a season, and now he finally scolded me.