Can Xue, a female writer: How many people can just be themselves like her, but regret losing the Nobel Prize, which is better than Mo Yan?

Reading can Xue's prose, breaking through the dye vat, gives birth to endless thoughts in my heart. I decided to read all the works of Can Xue, to feel the "mystery of Can Xue", and to feel her power to break through the dye vat and achieve herself.

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Can Xue, a female writer, blooms in the wall and smells fragrant outside. Known as the "mystery of remnant snow"

Among contemporary writers in China, the works have been translated the most, and it is Can Xue who has been selected as a textbook in foreign universities. In the nomination of 20 19 Nobel Prize for Writing, Can Xue has a high voice, but unfortunately she failed to win the prize.

In the past, few people knew that there was a woman writer can Xue. But its international popularity is much higher than Mo Yan's. Being praised by the world peers as one of the most influential avant-garde writers in China's literary world in 1980s.

Canxue's representative works include Cabin on the Mountain, Old Cloud, Breakthrough Performance and Huangni Street.

It was a few years ago that I met the writer Can Xue, and the writer entered the campus signature activity. At that time, I was introduced by a friend of the Scripture Institute: writer Can Xue, formerly known as Deng Xiaohua, from Hunan. When she was young, she worked as a miller, assembler, lathe worker, barefoot doctor and individual tailor.

Jiang Yang once said, "Only modest people have the best chance to see the truth of the world and human feelings."

Can Xue saw and touched the truth of the world and human feelings with a humble life perspective and a unique, isolated and lonely wandering soul. She "explores the soul" and presents "the scenery of the soul".

In the eyes of China people, Can Xue is a freak, an alien and even a "mental patient". But in the eyes of the world, she is a mystery. Moreover, there are many institutions specializing in her, trying to decipher the "mystery of remnant snow".

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Under the secular wisdom, save yourself by writing and create another life.

Can Xue was sensitive, thin, neurotic and stubborn since childhood. In the essay "Breakthrough from the Dyeing Tank", I described the emotional story of how I was influenced and stumped by the world, how I struggled and stubbornly avoided.

The story of teenagers is the same as that of most of us. When girls are together, their favorite thing to do is to speak ill of others behind their backs. Today I am good with this, and tomorrow I will be bad with her. Once falling out, it will forge a "deadly enemy", but this enemy can be resolved because of trivial matters, and then the enemies will get together and wear a pair of pants.

But when I was a child, can Xue had a unique stubbornness. At school, in the yard, I also like to speak ill of others and quarrel with others. Once a quarrel breaks out, it becomes a "sworn enemy" and it is difficult to reconcile in the heart.

In factories and writers' associations, as long as men and women get together, they will gossip about others and get endless fun from it. Can Xue is also "stupid" in the big dye vat at the bottom of this society.

But her idealism and behavior are contrary to common sense.

She can't understand why she wants to curry favor with a person when she clearly hates him to death. I don't understand the profound "hidden rules" of being a man and accidentally stepped on the border. Often outspoken, don't know what to say and what not to say.

As a result, she became a "problem youth" in the eyes of leaders and a heterogeneous one in the eyes of colleagues. He was expelled from the factory and had a "cold war" with the writers association for many years. Often isolated from the world, become a "lonely wandering soul."

Facing the "bottomless black hole" of interpersonal relationship, under the control of artistic self, all the daily affairs of Can Xue except writing become unbearable. As long as you engage in vulgar activities with others, you will hate yourself and affect your writing.

She feels that in the secular world, no matter how bad the performance is, as long as she is still creating, there is a good reason to live, and the "dark secular life" has also been given great significance-it has become the fuel of the flame. If you don't create, you will be overwhelmed by the darkness inside, that is, you will fall into a very miserable situation.

In the end, can Xue crushed the secular self to the maximum with her inner artistic self. Through writing, he created another kind of life, and also "saved his fallen soul", broke through the social dye vat, formed his own life mode, and formed the "mystery of residual snow" that the world wants to solve.

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In life, it is often the simplicity of the world that makes you lose yourself and achieve yourself.

I seem to understand the "stupidity" of Can Xue, and maybe I can read her Lonely Ghosts.

Growing up, I was never obedient, unyielding or likable. Often in groups of two or three, four or five, speak ill of others. Sometimes, for no reason, they are isolated.

In grade one, I can't remember why I had a quarrel with Zhang Ying on my way home from school. Encouraged by her, several other playmates stopped seeing me for a while. I never spoke to her again. So that when someone tried to introduce her to my cousin, she refused because she didn't want to talk to me.

During the summer vacation, all the old people and girls of the production team gathered in the creek ditch downstream of the reservoir to wash clothes. Because there is no money to buy washing powder or soap, tea cakes are used to wash clothes. On one occasion, Grandma Zhu said to her sister: How can tea cakes clean clothes? I want your mother to buy a bar of soap. Seems to be very concerned, but the tone is full of contempt. Other grandmothers, including my own grandmother, followed suit to "petition" for my mother.

My sister has been silent, and her head is rubbing. I am very angry. Slap the water with a wooden stick, splash high waves at them, and shout at them: What do you care? Since then, I have become a "dead girl" in the hearts of my grandmothers.

In the unit for decades, I just buried myself in the cart and didn't know how to look up. I don't want to do anything against my will, and I won't say anything against my will. I have never been scheming, and I have never been "smart".

At a formal meeting, a colleague criticized me for being "outspoken". After the meeting, the comrades silently felt wronged for me, but objectively speaking, I still want to thank her to remind myself that I want to change, but I just can't.

I don't understand or despise the way of the world, and I am a "hidden rule". But being outspoken has hurt myself and made me successful.

I think people should have their own personality and be able to distinguish between love and hate.

Even if you don't understand the world, you are honest and sincere, and you have won trust and respect.

You don't have to be insincere, opportunistic, please others, flatter yourself, and you can achieve yourself without losing yourself.