What do men and women need to prepare for their engagement?

Traditional wedding etiquette in China: There were six kinds of ceremonies in ancient times, namely, asking names, signing alliances, accepting contracts, accepting money, inviting parties and welcoming relatives. Later, it was divided into four parts, namely: seeking a name, forming an alliance (sending a contract), contracting (winning the lottery and coins), and welcoming in person (and inviting a meeting).

First, ask the name

The main ceremony of "asking names" is to exchange official names, ages and dates of birth, so as to understand each other's origins and measure whether this marriage is "suitable". The procedure is that the media will send the woman's "Geng Tie" to the man's house, and the man's house will put this post on the desk in front of the ancestor Buji. If the home is safe within 3 days, the man's wedding invitation will be sent to the woman's home. After the woman accepts it, she either asks an astrologer or agrees to get married.

At the beginning of talking about marriage, perhaps the woman asked the man to put forward a letter (word) as the basis for "spying" on the man. If the woman thinks it is appropriate and auspicious, she should write a score to the boys and girls and send it to the man's house together, otherwise the instrument will be returned to the original to do it.

The word (post) is written on red rectangular paper. Central straight books, such as the female book "A certain surname Kun is a certain year, a certain month, a certain day and a certain time"; The men's book "A certain surname was born on a certain day, a certain month, a certain time". The number of words must be even, such as odd, and men should add "sword" before new words. Women add "Rui" to new words. Although Zizi and Zizi are both called Niangeng, they are slightly different, that is, Jiageng, the first character of the eight characters, must be used for writing divination, while Zizi is used for writing records, ranking and so on. Used for searching and mining. Commonly known as "Zizi", it is a small year celebration, and "Zizi" is a big year Geng.

△ The marriage has not yet been decided, and the two sides cannot be tied together, and they can be agreed.

Second, subscribe.

Book, that is, set. The engagement ceremony is called Wen Ding, also called Xiao Pin, which is now the wedding ceremony. On fixed days and auspicious days, the man's family will prepare to send the bride price to the woman's family. Bridal gifts include: red silk (with gold lettering nailed on it or embedded with gold lettering), golden flowers (golden hairpin), gold rings, gold earrings, sheep, pigs, wedding candles, incense sticks, gift cakes, even flowerpots (meaning to have a precious child) and pomegranate flowers (meaning to have many children).

The media are accompanied by male parents or their relatives. The bride's family accepts most of the bride price and prepares 12 yuan in return. Gift cakes are distributed to friends and relatives as engagement notices. This is called "cake sharing". Donated relatives and friends must give wedding gifts in the future.

Hold an engagement wedding and a "ring-wearing" ceremony. At the time of delivery, 6 men or 12 (even number) come to the woman's house to give gifts, and the woman's house will place the dowry at the ancestral table of the shrine. Daughters to be married will bring fragrant tea to the hall and be introduced to meet them one by one. After drinking tea, the male family will each give out a red envelope on the teacup. Then the woman came back and stood on the chair in the middle of the hall (putting short feet on the other side means nobility; Marriage faces outward, recruit

The husband faces inward), and the man hangs a ring. There are two gold and copper rings (copper sounds the same, indicating that the couple are United), which are tied with red lines to indicate that the couple are married. After putting on the ring, the Qing family took a seat and the engagement ceremony was completed. There is also a simplification, which combines small employment with large employment, that is, the three ceremonies of subscribing to the alliance, winning the prize and winning the money are combined into one, which is called "sending".

Third, the end of employment (winning prizes and money)

The ceremony of paying money in the second lottery is called "employment completion" or "big employment". With the wedding documents, betrothal money, coins and silks (jewelry), etc., we will send them to the woman's home as a "gift of receiving coins", and the woman's home will also repay them according to the weight. After the appointment, the gift will be sent to the woman's home accompanied by the matchmaker. The bride price of wealthy families is grand, and its order is: blowing class (band), gift card (recording gift items and ceremony order), marriage certificate, bride price, pie, crystal sugar winter claw, orange cake, persimmon and blessing character.

Pills (dried longan), trotters, noodles, candy, two capons, two female ducks, one or several pairs of big candles, two bundles of gifts and incense, clothes (bride's dress), bracelets, gold rings, etc.

When the bride price arrives, the woman's family will burn incense and set off firecrackers to inform the ancestors of the gods and celebrate with the giver of the man's family. Give the book to the matchmaker. If the man doesn't give a gift, he will accept a part of it or return it intact, such as Fuwan, capon and female duck, which belong to the man's family and should be returned. Pig feet only take their meat, and the bones of pig feet should be returned. In return, use the groom's dress, clothes, shoes and socks, clock embroidery, etc. "Bridal gift": All the gifts are recorded on the red paper gift card, and the names should be double-taboo, and auspicious words such as happiness, success and double are often used. Posting style of wedding gifts: I sincerely hope to have a wedding letter, an open and sealed book, a double-sealed engagement fee, a sealed box of documents, a sealed training document, Jinlin Chengying, Shoupa Shuang Fu, Sexian Chengduan, Golden Pig as the first, Pleasant Goat as the only one, 80 sugar screens, 100 blessing pills, a box of dream candy, and double dragons and candles.

Fourth, the date of invitation.

Invitation is one of the six wedding ceremonies, commonly known as "sending the sun" or "rising the sun". That is, the man's family chooses the wedding date and writes down the birthdays of male and female students with red notes. This is called an invitation letter, which is carried by the media to the woman's house to discuss the wedding date with the hostess. With the consent of the woman's family, the man will give gifts such as books, candles and salutes. At the woman's house, she will give a gift cake to her relatives and friends and tell her the date of her return.

Fifth, kiss and greet.

Kissing means that the groom goes to the woman's house to marry the bride, or the wedding, which is today's wedding. In the old days, when the middle and lower families went on blind dates, there were many omissions, and only the matchmaker went to fix them up. The wedding ceremony changes with the progress of the times.

On the wedding day, the groom, together with the matchmaker and six or eight relatives and friends, will be accompanied as the guest of honor (commonly known as "marriage", namely the best man). Speaking of women's homes, please eat "egg soup" (a boiled egg in sweet soup). Eat egg soup, (only drink its sweet soup, poke or stir eggs with chopsticks). At the same time, the family reunion dinner is called "sister table", which is a farewell banquet. Father warned: "be diligent and careful, and listen to your aunt and husband sooner or later"; Mother warned: "respect and forbearance, three obedience and four virtues." The bride was reluctant to go, and the matchmaker urged her to get on the sedan chair. The bride kowtowed to her ancestors, bid farewell to her parents, and walked out of the west stage with the groom at a fixed time, supported by an old and lucky "lucky" sedan chair. When the bride gets into the sedan chair, she wants to cry a few times, commonly known as "crying for a good life" to show her good life. Not far from the sedan chair, the bride should put down a paper fan or handkerchief, commonly known as "putting a fan" and "sending a fan". As a parting gift. He also said: this refers to abandoning bad "sex" addiction for the sake of harmony, commonly known as "sex land" (sex and fan sheng). Along the way, I set off firecrackers by marrying Xiang Bin to show my fight against evil. The sedan chair stopped in front of the man's house and entered the door on an auspicious day. The groom knocks three times on the top of the sedan chair with a fan and three times on the "door" with his foot to show the groom's solemnity and make the bride obedient and easy to drive. Then a "lucky dog" led the bride out of the sedan chair, the matchmaker covered the sky with an umbrella, and the groom escorted her into the bridal chamber.

After the wedding reception, we eat the bride's tea, commonly known as "disturbing the bride", that is, drinking sweet tea and making fun of the bridal chamber. At this time, we congratulate the bride on her wedding with happy words, let her laugh and entertain, and test her patience or temperament with various funny forms, but the purpose is still to take this opportunity to watch the bride. The so-called "bride's tea" is accompanied by a matchmaker or family, and the bride and groom hold a tea tray to pay tribute to the guests with sweet tea, wax gourd and candy. Guests receive sweet tea and read a happy sentence. After drinking, the bride and groom came back to get the teacup. Guests should put a red envelope in the teacup as a congratulatory gift and read a happy sentence. The phrases read out are four pairs of rhymes, commonly known as "reading four sentences". In addition to expressing congratulations, the meanings of sentences are mostly auspicious or humorous, including ready-made sentences, impromptu sentences and often many wonderful sentences. As for "disturbing the bride", its tricks are not uncommon. Every time I embarrass the bride and groom and their families, I make them happy.