Degang Guo funny jokes daquan

First of all, many heroes flashed before my eyes, including Simon, a great official, and Mr. Chen (), who likes photography.

Secondly, in the end, we chose a country with picturesque scenery and spring-like seasons. (Yu Qian: Where? ) Tongxian County

3. Tired of walking, he sits here, and the dog sits here, one side is high, and people who come over wonder: Whose twin is this?

Fourth, don't leave when the party is over. I invite everyone to dinner, and whoever goes will pay.

5. Dad, I'm hungry! Hungry again, didn't you eat last year?

6. I am like this. I still eat noodles with or without garlic, even if CCTV is engraved on the garlic.

Pancakes and buns are eaten with rice.

Eight, I buy 50 good cars-Alto, Alto, Alto! Get up with a dart and drive like a train!

Nine, my watch is expensive, the original price is 350 thousand, and the discount is 420.

A tailor who doesn't want to be a cook is not a good driver.

Eleven, I eat fast, I cheat my stomach: you are full, you are full. ...

Twelve, you are willing to die, I am willing to bury it!

Thirteen, three feet Longquan thousands of books, born in the world, I can't serve the country. Whose husband am I? Yu Qian: What word? This is Degang Guo: Tang Poetry. Why are you looking for the daughter-in-law in Yu Qian's Tang poems?

Fourteen, these big girls all wear Tibetan meat.

Fifteen, dare to join the Beggars' Sect! Dressed up very well!

Sixteen, this head is the worst! /kloc killed his father at the age of 0/3, pushed his mother into the river at the age of 0/5, and died at the age of 0/7! I looked at her for less than 5 minutes, and my tears came down-elder sister, I think this is a misunderstanding. ...

17. This is my uncle (pointing to an old actor). I respect my uncle very much, an old performing artist. I wrote a song for my uncle. Sing a few words for you: Uncle, there are two holes in your nose. ...

18. (On a talk show) A foreigner said: In France, there are actors like Degang Guo, so we don't call them crosstalk. There are other names, but the difference is that in France, freedom of speech, actors can satirize French big shots. Degang Guo: Yes, we really can't do that. We should learn from you. Next time, we'll satirize French bigwigs.

19. Zhang Wenshun's mother is superstitious about wearing clothes. Alas, she died of illness. She went to get dressed and beg for incense ashes. Later, her stool dried up. After over a week, she took out two plates of mosquito-repellent incense.

20. There is a military wizard named Degang Guo in China. Wen can start writing and settle down. On the kang, you know the ladies-in-waiting, and on the kang, you know the shoes.

As soon as the car hit Yu Qian, the teacher flew away at one o'clock, and then the teacher opened his eyes: Hey, why am I here? Didn't you just walk on the road? Then why is it so far? I'm fine, too. I'm all right. Hey, here's a foot. Hey, this shoe is the same as mine. Take it off and have a look. Hey, this sock is the same as mine. Hey, take off your socks. This foot is the same as mine ... Help!

Twenty-two, six grenades for one dollar, I'll throw you a hundred dollars first!

Twenty-three, how dignified the swimsuit used to be. I used to have to open my swimsuit to see * * *, but now I have to open my swimsuit to see my swimsuit.

Twenty-four, I drank too much last time and ate chopsticks as chicken feet for one and a half.

You must not hit him or scold him. Just asking for money, so we can discuss it. But to put it bluntly, more than 100 yuan can kill the ticket.

Everyone is familiar with marriage, which is an amateur activity that the broad masses of people love to see and hear.

Twenty-seven, tired of walking, he sat here, the dog sat here, one side was high, and everyone who came over wondered: Whose twin is this?

Twenty-eight, I bought some paintings by Tang Bohu, including beautiful scenery and Fuwa, in sets of five. ....

Twenty-nine, roll back for three and a half weeks, more than a month.

Thirty, listen to cross talk twenty, and enter sixteen thousand. Laugh and add money. .

Mr. Guo, you respect yourself. We only sell ourselves, not artists.

Thirty-two, I stopped the woman who robbed on the road. I didn't know it was a laid-off woman until I asked. The more I talk about it, the more pathetic it becomes. Finally, I gave her five dollars.

When I was 33 years old, I bought some paintings by Tang Bohu, including beautiful scenery and Fuwa, in sets of five. ....

34. If you poke a noodle in that lock, you can open a bag of instant noodles.

Thirty-five years old, his sword is cold, his knife is cold, his heart is cold, his blood is cold ... this grandson is frozen!

Thirty-six, ten years in primary school and twelve years in middle school, was named the most familiar face in the whole school. When the new teacher came, he asked me about the school.

It's not enough for you to have friends from afar.

Thirty-eight, cross talk pays attention to four lessons: pit, Mongolia, abduction and deception!

I want to be a chef and a performing artist. ...

Forty, I know that some actors are disrespectful and end up hanging their children to prison. (Yu Qian: No, it's called imprisonment), but the hero's name is Diao Er.

Forty-one, the relationship between husband and wife is not necessarily good, and the good relationship is not necessarily husband and wife; Crosstalk masters don't necessarily speak crosstalk, and singers don't necessarily know music.

Forty-two, tower climbing competition, there are one or two third prizes, fifty thousand first prizes and seventy thousand second prizes. .....

Forty-three, changing clothes in the car, someone is lying on the window, big girl, look at this, I am anxious, do you always watch people change clothes like this? The woman replied, do you always change in other people's cars?

Forty-four, today is like July 7, when the god bird meets the foreign chicken.

45. The house we live in is riddled with holes, and when it rains, it will kill us: it rains outside, and it rains outside, sometimes it rains too hard, so the whole family goes to the yard to take shelter from the rain.

Forty-six, thank you for coming. It's amazing. It's Chinese New Year before the first month, so I salute you and wish you happiness in your later years.

47. If you want to die, I am willing to bury it.

Forty-eight, there are four dishes on the table, open the first one, oh! Very good! Old vinegar peanuts! Open the second one, even better! Old vinegar peanuts! Open the third one, peanuts, no vinegar! The fourth one looks like a plate of vinegar!

49. Pancakes and steamed buns are served with rice.

50. Beef noodles and home-cooked meals-what do the Japanese want to eat? Well, the Japanese pointed with their hands: cow shit!

Fifty-one, this head is the worst! /kloc killed his father at the age of 0/3, pushed his mother into the river at the age of 0/5, and died at the age of 0/7! I looked at her for less than 5 minutes, and my tears came down-elder sister, I think this is a misunderstanding. ...

52. Don't think that tattooed people are hooligans. Yue Fei still has tattoos.

I bought Wang Xizhi's handwritten Chinese characters: One World, One Dream.

54. Scientists know martial arts, and even immortals can't stop them.

I am a clean and pure person, and chastity and virtue are my pronouns. Wherever I go, the chastity archway follows, and I never take outside work.

56. Today is like July 7th. The God Bird met a foreign chicken.

57. Later, I built a refugee camp for them, and they all moved in. I saw a man with a beard. I stepped forward and asked, who are you? Bin Laden (Bin Laden is here) I am scared: The whole world is after you, don't you know? Forget it, forget it, let them catch me after listening to your cross talk!

Fifty-eight, as the saying goes, people go up and urine flows down.

Fifty-nine, just then, Bush's bp machine rang.

Sixty, the white house-freshly brushed pulp.

Sixty-one, tower climbing competition, there are one or two third prizes, 50 thousand first prize and 70 thousand second prize. .....

Sixty-two, change clothes in the car, someone is lying on the window, big girl, look at this, you are anxious, do you always watch people change clothes like this? The woman replied, do you always change in other people's cars?

Sixty-three, last time I drank too much, I used chopsticks as chicken feet and ate one and a half.

Sixty-four, she picked up her slippers and hit me. Oh, you think I'm Bush.

65. Everyone is familiar with marriage, which is an amateur activity loved by the broad masses of people.

It's sunny in Xuanwu District, and people in Tongzhou District like it very much. They looked at Fengtai and shouted, I love you Haidian. (Yu Qian: King of the Suburbs) Although the length of this poem is not very large, it reflects the harmony and friendship of the people, the unity and cooperation of districts and counties, and the people's contribution to the realization of the four modernizations and the smooth convening of the China-Africa Forum. It embodies this meaning. (Yu Qian: How can that represent? ) I said yes, I think so, yes.

Sixty-seven, that lock is opened with a noodle stick, and a bag of instant noodles can open a community.

If I don't beat you, I will turn against you.

Sixty-nine, if you want to die, I am willing to bury it.

Seventy, Confucius said: good cabbage is arched by pigs.

Seventy-one, I plan to rob an armored car. I want to practice first, and I want to practice holding a bike first.

Seventy-two changes, how dignified the previous swimsuit was. I used to have to open my swimsuit to see * * *, but now I have to open my swimsuit to see my swimsuit.

Seventy-three, that's your father, I mean your father!

Seventy-four, there is such bright light at the foot of my bed. Is there frost already? Looking up, I found it was moonlight. My name is Degang Guo.

Seventy-five, China, there is a military wizard named Degang Guo, who can write and settle the world, and can mount a horse and make a dry Kun; On the kang, you know the ladies-in-waiting, and on the kang, you know the shoes.

Seventy-six (holding a piece of jade) benefactor, this is for you personally! !

Seventy-seven, China, there is a military wizard named Degang Guo, who can write the world and mount Ankun; On the kang, you know the ladies-in-waiting, and on the kang, you know the shoes.

Seventy-eight, a catty of watermelon, weighed on time.

Seventy-nine, the world is silent, and the mind is broad. Whose business is my business. For the benefit of the people and the relief of the society, I will help you helpless mentally retarded groups. (Vulnerable groups) regard your business as my business and see that everyone is like my children.

Eighty, dad, I'm hungry! Hungry again, didn't you eat last year?

Eighty-one, the way you * * * has my youthful charm.

Eighty-two, the world is cold and broad-minded, whose business is my business, for the benefit of the people, for social relief, to help you helpless mentally retarded groups, (vulnerable groups) take your business as my business and see that everyone is like my child.

Mr. Guo, you respect yourself. We only sell ourselves, not artists.

It was very cold, so I sent you a coat. The post office said it was too heavy, so I took off the buckle and put it in my pocket.

I am a second-hand scientist.

Eighty-six, jump off a building and kill more coke. I studied it. The twentieth floor and the second floor have different effects. The second floor is bang, ah! Twentieth floor. Yeah ~ ~ ~ Bang!