Magician: The marriage is unhappy. Is there any way to change it?

The illusionist replied: the so-called "husband and wife are enemies" in folk beliefs is not a Buddhist concept. The concept of "husband and wife are enemies" is incorrect because they turn love into possession. When one side is very strong inside, two people will have friction. After friction, love becomes hatred, because of hatred, suspicion and jealousy, and then mutual resentment, resulting in resentment. In fact, marriage can be avoided as long as one party is willing to adjust the concept of hatred. The way to make up for it is that if you love him, you have to pay more, pay more, care more and respect more for each other, and let them know that he has such a good spouse. Then, why would he want to divorce you? Even if the other party has an affair, you should forgive; Even if he is really outrageous, don't be unreasonable. After trying, if the other person can't turn back, then give up. Even if we are separated, don't say we are enemies. We should get together and then part. When I have tried my best and can't get it back, I no longer feel sorry and can explain it to my children. Q: Before studying Buddhism, the marriage was not satisfactory. The existing heart is reconciled with her husband, but he treats her coldly. How to face this matter? The illusionist replied: You can try to practice with the following three principles: (1) If you can change the environment and others, then change the environment and others to suit us! If the environment cannot be changed, you have to train yourself to adapt to the outer edge. This is the first principle. (2) People are not vegetation, and everyone has feelings. So no matter how others treat us, we should continue to treat them with our initial love. It may not be effective to continue to be kind to them, but at least it will be more effective than malicious treatment. After all, divorce and affair cannot be encouraged. -This is the second principle. (3) The third principle is to channel your thoughts and feelings through various interests, such as listening to music, climbing mountains, sports, traveling and so on. In short, under the premise of not violating the law and morality, give full play to one's lust in a sensible, reasonable and legal way, so as to alleviate and resolve marriage troubles. Q: The marriage is unhappy. Is there any way to change it? The illusionist replied: Yes, as long as you believe in three generations of karma, you will have good results if you plant good karma. Perseverance will eventually bear fruit. A happy marriage comes from our past and present behavior; A happy marriage is not a godsend, nor a fate, but the result of what we do. If the marriage is unhappy, there is no need to complain, let alone give up on yourself. From now on, we should learn to change our marriage and destiny. (1) I believe that the cause is the result, and I believe that everything is caused by myself. The Buddhist scripture says, "Even after a hundred robberies, the work will not die. When the karma meets, the consequences are at your own risk. " If we understand that what we are now is only the result of our sense of industry, I believe that the grievances accumulated in our hearts will be greatly reduced; (2) For an unhappy marriage, don't make it worse, but take good care of it; "I really admit that I was wrong, don't say other people's fault. If he is right or wrong, he will feel very sad. "To learn to find each other's benefits and find their own shortcomings. We should learn to put ourselves in the other's shoes, be compassionate, and have the mind of "returning good for evil" to slowly repair family relations. Even if you can't meet your expectations, don't be impulsive and easily file for divorce. This is the worst. (3) Do more good deeds, accumulate good deeds, and repay this merit to relieve grievances. China's Book of Changes said: "Where there is a good family, there is Qing Yu. If you accumulate one poor family, there will be more than one. "If a person can always do good, his fate must be good; If you do bad things as usual, you will get what you deserve in the end. A family can always do good, and future generations must be good. The story of Mr. Yuan Lefan in the Ming Dynasty is the best example of transforming fate: Yuan Lefan was a native of Wujiang in the south of the Yangtze River in the Ming Dynasty. In the fourth year of Qin Long (1570), he was promoted to the provincial examination, and in the fourteenth year of Wanli (1586), he was promoted to Jinshi, and he was given the title of Baodi county magistrate. Later, he was in charge of the Ministry of War. Mr Liao Fan was in Ciyun Temple in Yunnan in his early years. I met a respectable Mr. Kong, who told his fortune and decided the good or bad of his life. And predicted that he would have no children in his life. He wrote the prophecy that "all tests are tests", and Yuan believed that everything was doomed from now on. Later, after meeting Zen master Xu Gu in Nanjing, he was taught to do good. During his tenure as a county magistrate, he worked hard to seek happiness for the people, and his fate changed dramatically. He not only pursued his own wishes, but also gave birth to two sons after middle age. In order to educate future generations, he specially wrote the book "Four Chapters of Fan Fan" to teach people how to be a man, how to eliminate disasters, how to cultivate good deeds and accumulate good fortune, and how writers teach children. The book On Every Scholar in Four Seasons has a great influence on later generations. Many people take Mr. Yuan Lefan as an example and actively do good deeds, with obvious results. Many examples have been collected in the inductive articles of various good books, which have been passed down to the rank, which can be said to have a great influence. If Mr. Yuan Lefan tries to turn over a new leaf, his marriage and fate will change. Recommended reading: How to use Buddhism to save a marriage on the verge of breaking up? Practice has completely changed her: marriage, children, everything is doomed to divorce. She can change the fate calculated by studying Buddhism. Marriage between men and women is more difficult to change. How to treat marital disharmony between men and women? There was a couple's divorce bill in a previous life (you must read it if you don't like your spouse). A short story worth learning for all couples. Love is fake. Are you kidding yourself? Articles that should be read before marriage and divorce. It is the most practical way to cultivate family harmony in the family. How to turn Buddhism into your own blessings and wisdom? How does Buddhism view the importance of love, marriage and family? Thai monks explain the causes and consequences of some marriage and family diseases. Real men should cry when they see it (ladies are not allowed to enter the men's room). Will fortune telling be punished in advance by the gods? How to change the fate determined by the date of birth (1)- How to change the fate determined by the date of birth (2)- The secret of improving the fate lies in transforming the fortune through robbery and escape. Tell me the fact that prediction and fate are exactly the same. Why is the fate completely different? Love between men and women has past lives. 100% destiny takes a hand? What is the best marriage relationship to be a couple and husband and wife in a previous life? How to ensure a happy marriage in the next life? Begging for a wife and a husband!