Can Shuiming and the fire of life be together?

First, is Shuiming and the fire of life together? 1. Shuiming is not very good with people who are on the fire of life, and their state is not very good either, because both of them are grumpy and easy to irritate each other when they encounter problems, so they are actually bitter, and there will be many contradictions when they are together for a long time, which will affect their feelings. There is an idiom in our country that fire and water are incompatible, so it is said that a person is destined to be water and a person is the fire of life. Living together is not very good, and both of them are vulnerable to each other's injuries and attacks, so we must be careful when choosing the other half. 3. So, is Shuiming and the fire of life together? The actual situation is not very good, but these are superstitions that have not been scientifically verified. If you want to live a happy life after marriage, two people should understand and tolerate each other and achieve each other. Second, how to avoid mutual interference when husband and wife are incompatible 1. If one spouse is water and the other is the fire of life, it can be avoided by changing the living environment. I suggest that you choose to live in the south, or choose to work in the south, which can play a certain role in alleviating. 2. If both are lucky, one is the fire of life and the other is water sleep, then it is suggested that we get married later, and older people will be more mature and cautious when considering one thing. After two people fall in love, it takes at least two to three years to understand each other's temper and personality before they can marry each other. 3. If Shuiming and the fire of life have many contradictions after marriage and often quarrel, but they have feelings and don't want to be separated, I suggest that everyone have a child. It is necessary to have a five-element baby, and it is necessary to have a wooden baby. The wooden baby can play a balancing role and reduce the occurrence of quarrels and bickering between husband and wife. Can Shuiming and the fire of life be together? Why do couples often quarrel? 1. Words hurt the communication between husband and wife. If it is simple and rude without thinking, then language will not become a link of communication, but a solid wall. The following communication methods between husband and wife are violent communication methods: 1. The most common phrase to pass the buck is: It's all your fault. Traveling on holiday and encountering a big traffic jam, one of them may say: it's all your fault. What path did you choose? If you really love me, what is hidden in this sentence is a subjective will rather than reality. The parties feel that their partners should understand themselves, take the initiative to meet their own needs and give themselves a higher quality of love. You love ... more than me. This is a typical jealous behavior. Jealous of work, games and each other's parents are actually afraid that the relationship between each other and themselves will drift away, and inner insecurity will arise. I can't stand your words. It's really too common. Any small gesture of the other party can arouse your anger. Anyway, you can't stand it. You can't stand each other playing games. You can't stand each other sitting and watching TV. Sometimes you can't stand each other eating Chili. 5. You have changed/you will not change. People who use this sentence feel betrayed. You are not as kind to me as before. You said you would quit smoking, but you never did. On the other hand, such criticisms and accusations are either counter-attacks or attributed to "I am like this". 6. You are always/you are never like this. You never think of others. The act of labeling these words regards the temporary behavior of the other party as a constant feature, which is easy for the criticized party to break the jar. 7. I have already told you that it is very hurtful for one party to make mistakes or problems and the other party to quarrel on Monday morning the day after tomorrow. After the failure, the feelings of the parties have been very bad. If you add this accusation of "I told you so", the relationship between two people will be alienated faster. 8. You embarrass me. My friend once told me about her husband's figure. She thinks it will be embarrassing to bring her husband to a party with friends, because he is too fat and doesn't know how to dress himself. He looks ugly and fat. 9. You lied to me. This play is often performed between Chen and Jiang in Chinese Divorce. The wife is suspicious by nature and always suspects that her husband will cheat. Husband and female colleagues together, never dare to tell his wife, for fear that talking too much will cause trouble. There is no cornerstone of trust between husband and wife. I really should first think about why the other party doesn't trust me and how to make the other party trust me. 10. When two people quarrel, one of them often quits the quarrel early, but this does not mean that the war is over. This kind of behavior is often silent resistance, which will lead to a bigger war without smoke. Second, the troubles of household chores 1, household chores Everyone has different definitions of cleanliness and neatness, and their habits of doing housework are also different. Some people like cooking, while others like washing clothes. These seemingly insignificant things will indeed become common contradictions between husband and wife. 2. Financial Disputes The protagonist and his wife in Pursuit of Happyness had a lot of quarrels because the man's road to entrepreneurship was not smooth and even the most basic life could not be maintained. Finally, their marriage broke down. 3. Discontent No matter whether the man or the woman thinks that their sexual life is unsatisfactory, the active party will think that they have lost their appeal, resulting in the idea that the other party does not care about themselves, and contradictions will naturally appear constantly. Third, the influence of family background Marriage is really not only the combination of two people, but also the combination of two families. Everyone has more or less the characteristics of parents, and some parents will openly participate in the contradiction between husband and wife. How to resolve the quarrel between husband and wife 1, awaken desire and discover inner needs? Everyone wants to be understood, respected, listened to, loved and cared for ... these are our inner needs. Everyone's inner needs can only be met by themselves. When we were children, we depended on the help of adults to survive. But when we are adults, everyone has the ability to satisfy themselves, give themselves the love and care they want, listen to themselves in a quiet environment, eat well and sleep well, and give themselves the best care. When they stop asking for help around the world, their relationship with their partners will improve. 2. Closely interact and get along actively. It takes a lot of investment to establish a real intimate relationship. When you interact with your partner, you will get all kinds of experiences, good or bad, moving or annoying, incredible. It doesn't matter. When people get along with each other, they should first expose their true selves, instead of avoiding quarrels and conflicts. 3. It is a kind of practice to expose problems and untie the intimate relationship of the heart knot. In the process of getting along with your partner, you can see that your subconscious mind has some kind of pain. Don't hide, don't be lazy, tell each other your experiences and try to untie the knot. Effective quarrel is a very good way to realize the problem and reveal it. In this process, people can have a deeper and more comprehensive understanding of themselves, and their partners will become more empathetic. 4. Emancipate yourself and get rid of the mindset. If someone thinks what he says is worthless, he will refuse to speak. What he thinks is restrictive beliefs. It is necessary to empower this restrictive belief and turn it into "my idea must have its value, so I will say it", which is considered to be liberating myself and getting rid of the mindset. Only when thinking changes can action really change. Love is not as fragile as imagined, and the partner can't stand any setbacks. Two people in love should dare to break the existing balance, explore deeper contradictions, and make their relationship with each other and their relationship better through constant trial and error. 5. Rebuilding the matrix, shaping new relationships and repairing cracks in the relationship are important catalysts for rebuilding the matrix. In addition to repairing the relationship, we must rebuild a new matrix, create new experiences together between partners, and establish a happy and benign neural circuit in each other's brains. If we have another conflict, then I will calm down and see what my inner emotions are, what happened, and what methods can better solve these problems. 6. Stick to action and become a better self. Change the inherent mode and achieve new relationships. Just like learning a skill, you need to practice it deliberately, jump out of your comfort zone and develop new habits. Set yourself a goal, change a certain pattern, focus on one goal for a short time, and then achieve one new goal after another until you get better and better, and the relationship becomes closer and closer. The first taboo of quarreling between husband and wife: divorce is on the lips. Some couples argue about this, such as forgetting to charge the gas card at home, so they can't cook and take a bath. Then take the quarrel as an opportunity to clarify family responsibilities and division of labor. Men mainly bear the cost of water, gas, coal and electricity, property management fees and mortgage fees. If there are mistakes in this and life can't work normally, then the woman can talk about it; Women are mainly responsible for daily household hygiene, daily fast-moving consumer goods, rice, vegetables, oil and salt, snacks and fruits. If there is a long-term shortage of materials and piles of dirty clothes are not washed, the man can also talk about it. But there is a kind of person who asks for a divorce as long as he is unhappy. The key is whether you want a divorce or not. If you really can't get through it, divorce directly. However, these people don't really want a divorce, but regard marriage as a threat and think that the other party is afraid to leave, so there is nothing to be afraid of. There is a limit to people's patience. If you really don't want a divorce, don't bring it up every time you quarrel. The second taboo: curse each other's parents or family. Of course, nowadays couples quarrel in the room with the door closed, but if they quarrel, it will often hurt the whole family, such as "there is nothing good in your family" and "your parents are nothing" If it is only a problem between husband and wife, it is still practical; If the contradiction between husband and wife is really caused by the other family, it will be practical. You can't use insulting words to attack each other's parents or the whole family, which is also very uncivilized. Again, if you find the balance point of the family through quarreling, talk about the matter, and don't divide the east and the west. Only by sorting out and solving the relationship and contradiction between husband and wife can we solve more problems and contradictions. The third taboo: attack the shortest point of the other party. Attacking each other's shortcomings hurts not only their feelings, but also their self-esteem. Even if two people make up, they may fall into shadow. I have a girlfriend who is not tall and her husband is 30 cm tall. I think her husband chased her at first, but every time I quarreled, I opened my mouth and said, "You short melon!" " "Who can stand such rude language? It can only induce deeper anger and sustained attacks on both sides, and eventually both sides will lose. When some couples quarrel, they like to say, you are so old and ugly; Moreover, when some wives quarrel with their husbands, they like to say that you are poor and useless ... they can only say that they are born from the same root, and there is no need to worry about each other. If you think your wife is old and ugly, think about what her wife was like when she got married and what kind of life makes her old and ugly now; If you think your husband has no money and no ability, think about whether he was a man without ambition and struggle when he got married. What should couples do if they often quarrel? 1, talk about the matter and don't turn over old scores. When some couples quarrel, they like to turn over old scores, and they have to say what is wrong. Everyone doesn't want to bring up unpleasant memories, so both sides of the quarrel should talk about facts, eliminate differences and reach an understanding. Don't use the topic to dig up old scores and hurt each other's feelings for quick results. 2, clear the extent of the quarrel, to avoid the intensification of contradictions. The quarrel between husband and wife must end. As a close lover, you must know each other's bottom line. When quarreling, don't cross this bottom line and hurt each other's feelings. Both sides of the quarrel were impulsive and said things they shouldn't have said. In order to avoid irreparable consequences, when the quarrel reaches a certain level, we must stop, don't add fuel to the fire, and let the other side calm down. If one party intends to stop quarreling, don't be aggressive, even if it is reasonable, let others. 3. Wash your dirty linen in public. In the quarrel between husband and wife, as private "dirty clothes", it is not suitable for publicity. Never let friends and relatives help you judge the contradictions that should be digested within your family just to vent your anger. This is extremely stupid. Some words can't be said, especially when it comes to both parents, humiliating personality and not expanding the scope of quarrel. Obviously, because the children quarrel, they quarrel with both parents. No matter how angry you are, you should pay attention to your discretion and don't attack each other and their families with words. 4. Stop loss in time and choose an opportunity to mediate. When a husband and wife quarrel, stop loss in time, learn to stop when they are good, leave room, save face for each other, and leave a way out for themselves. Husband and wife quarrel is the way to deal with contradictions, and solving problems is the purpose. Mediation also needs to grasp the time, choose the time when the other party's mood improves, calmly and objectively analyze things, and make it easier for the other party to accept. In the relationship between husband and wife, quarreling is normal. Two people with different backgrounds, different experiences and different insights get along with each other day and night, and there must be ideological differences. It's okay to quarrel, but you should be measured. Quarrel is to express your feelings and let the other party know that it is to solve problems, not to vent their anger. Therefore, we should learn the correct way to open quarrels, and don't break up families because of this.