What is the difference in etiquette between marriage and concubinage in ancient times?

That depends on the dynasty. To put it simply: usually there is a line in TV series, "I was carried into the gate by you in a big sedan chair", which is about getting married in the main room. The ceremony is grand and the main door comes in. Concubine is a happy event, but the ceremony is simple.

The Ming and Qing Dynasties were the final form of the ancient marriage system in China, and the concept of marriage hierarchy was slightly lower than before. Moreover, it is even stipulated in the Marriage Law of Daming Legalist that the physical condition of marriage should be informed when engaged, which is quite eugenic in later generations.

Form and content of taking a wife and concubinage

In ancient times, the purpose of marrying a wife was not only to continue the blood line, but also to show the ethical principles and the harmony between the two families, so the ritual system was extremely obvious in the process of marrying a wife. According to the Confucian Book of Rites, this process can be divided into six parts, namely "Six Rites".

"Only then", the man asked the matchmaker to propose marriage to the woman's house, and after getting permission, he sent a gift-goose (goose is a bird that follows the sun, symbolizing the principle that the wife follows her husband). I hate to say that you are too shabby, sir ...

"Ask the name", the matchmaker asks the woman what her surname is, in order to know whether the other person has the same surname as herself, because the ancients learned through observation that "men and women have the same surname, but life is not feudal".

"Naji", when the man learns the woman's surname, if he gets a good omen, he will repay the woman's family.

"Conscription", that is, engagement, is to give the woman silks, deerskin and other gifts.

"Please invite", the man chooses the date of the wedding.

"Kissing" means that the man personally goes to the woman's house to get married on the specified date.

The six rites system is too complicated. In Song Dynasty, it was simplified into three types: receiving gifts, collecting coins and welcoming relatives. Moreover, sending "geese" was later changed to sending sheep, wine and color, which is also a great progress for wildlife protection.

In other words, as the leader of the Confucian world, the Confucian was born a hermit, and he didn't even move his first step. The educated princess should have gone through the door. In fact, she can come to the door whenever she wants, but the nature is different.

Compared with taking a wife, concubine is very simple. The word "that" feels very low compared with "marriage", and concubines can also be bought. Zheng Xuan once commented in Notes to the Book of Rites that "concubines share common property because of their meanness", which shows that concubines' position is extremely humble. Generally speaking, concubinage requires the consent of the wife, and there are many children in old age, but concubinage may also come from marriage, elopement, gift, official distribution and so on. Among them, "from marriage is" and in "dead body", it is speculated that it is the system of the Queen of Hubei marrying Yao. Judging from the concubinage system, the status of concubinage and wife is incomparable. The clan and husband of concubinage are not good for Qin Jin, but more like the relationship between businessmen and customers.

The wife "marries" and the concubine "accepts". The property given to Yue's family by his wife when she gets married is called "bride price", while the property given to Yue's family when he concubines is called "buying concubine money".

Marrying a wife is very formal, and it requires matching, divination and matchmaker's words. The dowry given by the man and the dowry given by the woman are both very rich, and it is necessary to get married in ten miles.

Concubine is much simpler, just take a sedan chair and enter the man's house from a side door. No wedding ceremony, little dowry, generally no dowry.