What if the child is not filial?

Some middle-aged and elderly people feel very distressed when their children are unfilial. Some old laymen have met the same fate, which will seriously hinder their own practice. For this problem, I suggest that you can use the two concepts of causality and impermanence in Buddhism to solve it:

First of all, we should look at the relationship between family members from the perspective of causality.

Both practitioners and ordinary people should form a good habit-"reflect on yourself when things happen, and don't look at each other's shortcomings." Only in this way can the contradiction be truly solved. From the causal point of view, whether the relationship between you and your children is harmonious or contradictory does not depend entirely on your children, but is caused by your past karma, that is, "self-made."

Change yourself from the perspective of Buddhism (data map)

Specifically, judging from the cause and effect of this life, when children are not filial, don't rush to criticize, first calm down and reflect on yourself: Did you filial to your parents when you were a child? If you find that you are unfilial, stop complaining about your children. It is likely that you set a bad example for your children, and the root cause is yourself. At this time, you should sincerely repent in front of Buddha and Bodhisattva.

Judging from the cause and effect of three generations, the relationship between parents and children does not only depend on what they have done in this life, but comes from many generations of karma. Even if you were filial as a child, you can't know whether your relationship with your parents was good or bad, whether you owed it to your parents or your parents owed it to you.

There is such a case-solving in "Viewing the Endless Life Sutra": In the era of Sakyamuni Buddha, there was a Mogarto country in India, and the king was called Pinboniro. Because he was old and childless, Pingpogro was worried that there was no heir to the throne, so he invited a fortune teller to tell his fortune. The fortuneteller said, "There was a Taoist priest in the mountain who died three years later and was reincarnated as a prince." The king was overjoyed, but he couldn't wait three years because he longed for a child. He even sent someone to kill the Taoist priest. Soon, the queen, Mrs. Wittig, became pregnant and gave birth to a prince named Akos, who was the reincarnation of a Taoist priest. When he grew up, he was provoked by treacherous court officials, dispatched troops to launch a coup, usurped the throne, imprisoned his father and starved him to death. Mrs. Wittig asked to visit the old king. With her son's consent, she secretly mixed honey and fried noodles to satisfy her hunger. After a while, Archie was surprised to see that his father was still alive. When he learned that his mother had secretly brought food, he imprisoned his mother and even tried to kill her. Mrs. Wittig was very sad and prayed to the Buddha, so the Buddha appeared in front of her, telling her about her past life with the prince and revealing the Pure Land Law.

From this case, we can know that if we have a bad relationship with our children in the past, we will meet unfilial children in this life. On the other hand, if we have a good relationship with our children in the past and can maintain kindness with our children in this life, then we can not only get filial children in this life, but also ascend to heaven in the afterlife.

There is a case in Nirvana Sutra: Once upon a time, a mother and daughter crossed the Ganges and were unfortunately drowned by the river. Then the mother thought, "If my daughter doesn't drown, I can die."