Classic satirical sentences

First, like Shakespeare and Zorro, your voice is Sandy and Zuo.

Second, the world is like this, and it is all hypocritical. If it is not hypocrisy, how can it be called the world? Yes What's so funny about death? People are forced to commit suicide. The world is full of complaints. If you don't adapt to this world, you will only be eliminated by this world.

Third, even though I am small, I am still great when I try to live for myself, but I don't know the size of greatness. . .

I love my weeds, but I hate the ground decorated with weeds.

I'm not afraid of death. I'm afraid that no one will love you as much as I do after I die.

6. Superorganisms that live with cockroaches, semi-plants with declining vitality,

7. If being handsome is a gift from God, it seems that God didn't look at you.

Eight, I have always believed that as long as one thing is put at the hearing, it is basically settled-this is an issue that cannot be discussed.

Nine, flowers often do not belong to people who appreciate flowers, but belong to cow dung.

Marriage is the grave of love-you can't even get into the grave without a house!

1 1. A true good friend is not having endless topics together, but not feeling embarrassed even if he doesn't talk.

12. Lei Feng did a good deed without leaving a name, but everything was recorded in his diary.

Sister Wen, stand aside, it's blocking my cell phone signal.

Fourteen, the four major sorrows of life: a long drought meets sweet rain, a drop; When you meet an old friend in a foreign country, you are a creditor; Wedding night, next door; When nominating a gold medal, dream.

15. What is happiness? Happiness is that you eat fish, I eat meat and watch others chew bones.

Sixteen, people always want to let ghosts and gods know when they do good things, and they always think that ghosts and gods don't know when they do bad things. We are too difficult to be ghosts.

17. Without you, how can we set off the beauty of the world?

Eighteen, flower world, flower heart, flower people deceive people; If you achieve your goal, you will change your mind and pity the daughter of the world; Let men break their hearts, men are flowers;

When the sky is still blue and the clouds are still clear, you shouldn't cry, because my departure doesn't take away your world.

Twenty, a dinosaur that degenerates three times a day, the strongest waste in human history,

Twenty-one, I would rather accept your desperate resistance under hooligans than your ecstasy under men!

Twenty-two, nine roses are long-lasting, 99 roses are long-lasting, and 99 roses are more luxurious and longer. . .

Twenty-three, the heart is a gentleman, and the heart is not a villain; Everyone knows how to guard against him, but the most difficult thing to measure is those who say Yao and Shun, share the same aspirations, swear mountains and seas and have traps in their hearts. This hypocritical hypocrite is bound to do something.

Twenty-four, when there is a legend in the rivers and lakes, I am sorry for the audience.

Twenty-five, people can not extricate themselves, except teeth and love.

Twenty-six, there are too many liars, and fools are obviously not enough.

I am very happy to see people holding watermelons, so I am also very happy to see you.

No matter how good, he is also a fat man! Eat every day to become a pig!

Twenty-nine, I tried to control the magic in my heart, but I ignored that you might just be the ghost who played soy sauce. . .

Without you, how can I set off the beauty of the world?

Thirty-one, don't drag in front of me like 2580 thousand, put on a pOSE!

Thirty-two, how to lose weight without eating?

Thirty-three, disloyalty, things will be unfilial; You must not be honest when making friends, and you must not be moral when treating subordinates. Such people are mean people!

Thirty-four, the villain has no knot, abandoning the roots and chasing the end. I like thinking about it, and I think about it in anger.

35. It's no use being so fat. I wonder if pork is seriously healthy now?

The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously.

Thirty-seven, because of such a scientific truth, Doudou Mimi just won't tell you. Just so-so, third in the world.

38. Bitches are always bitches. Even with inflation, it can't be expensive!

Thirty-nine, I can mix so many bad habits of human beings so perfectly. I believe it's a pity that Raytheon can't touch you when you go out in the rain. . .

When you see a shadow in front, don't be afraid, it's because there is sunshine behind.

Forty-one, clap your head to make a decision, and clap your chest to ensure that you leave.

Time is like a net, where you sow, you reap.

Please don't insult my IQ with your poor acting skills!

Forty-four, disloyalty, things will be unfilial; You must not be honest when making friends, and you must not be moral when treating subordinates. Such people are mean people!

45. Do a good job and live a wonderful life.

I love you, but I dare not say it. I'm afraid I will die soon.

47. Third party, you dropped your skirt.

Forty-eight, how long are you going to gain weight? There are so many beautiful clothes that you can't wear them. You go to the clothing store, and they say there is no size like yours, only size S.

49. Don't be afraid of being used. People use you, which means you still have use value.

50. I think a lot, but I feel a lot. . .

5 1. Your eyes are brighter than Zhuge Liang, your love is deeper than Lu, your affection is longer, your personality is crazier, and your promise is more empty than the Monkey King.

52. Women shed more tears in bed than anywhere else. Men lie in bed, and there are a lot of them everywhere.

53. I am a passer-by who you turn around and forget. Why should I spend the rest of my life with you?

Fifty-four, people don't commit me, I don't commit crimes; If people offend me, comity three points; If people force me again, I'll give you an injection; People still attack me and kill the grass.

55. I am convinced that your musical talent is definitely not a mere display of sound. . .

56. You are patriotic, dedicated and have a lot of backbone. You never speak ill of others behind their backs, nor do you frame them. You are the least dirty person in the world. You have a high moral character and never hit anyone. You are honest, kind and beautiful. Forgive what I just said against my will.

57. I am not a fortune teller in the square. I can't say so much as you like.

I can't miss myself, I can't take care of myself, I can't take care of myself, I can't take care of myself, I can't give myself happiness.

On the 59th, a woman tried to transform me. As a result, she only dismantled my parts and never put them on me again. . .

Sixty, I really don't understand what these stars in China think. If they don't have any works, they will go to major film festivals to rub the red carpet every day. One by one, the old ladies in their late thirties squeezed their chests and exposed their ditches. Is this beautiful? And a French kiss kneeling on the red carpet. You think that's your bedroom? Going abroad is a disgrace to China people.

Sixty-one, there is no shame in showing love these days. The most shameful thing is to show the air conditioner. ...

62. Your appearance is refreshing.

63. The furthest distance in the world is not the ends of the earth, because I was born in my motherland, but I don't know what is happening in my motherland.

The roundest thing in the world is not necessarily a ball, but also a person.

Sixty-five, the death of one person is a tragedy, but the death of millions of people is only a statistic.

Adults want smart and beautiful flowers on their children's heads, while others' children's heads should be just a bunch of weeds.

Sixty-seven, ashamed to be ashamed of the adulterer, and willing to be a skirt cow.

Sixty eight. Which school did you graduate from? Your annoying degree has been completed as a postdoctoral fellow! !

Life always likes to throw me as a tug-of-war between angels and demons. To get back at them, I decided to make a straw rope, break it, and then they all rolled away. . .

Seventy, I really want to send you into a cage to swim the streets and taste the delicious Chinese cabbage and rotten eggs.

Seventy-one, men fool women, called flirting; Women fool men, called seduction; Men and women fool each other, which is called love.

The longer you have contact with people, the more you like dogs. Dogs are always dogs, and people are sometimes not people!

A satirical classic sentence

A satirical classic sentence 1. After all, this is not a society that everyone loves. You'd better restrain yourself.

Please respect yourself.

Do you think everyone believes you? Just a superficial response. We all know your hypocrisy. Being crowned as a monkey is sour and jealous.

4, you think you are the sun, others have to revolve around you. You know, there is only one earth in the universe, which may make your arrogance explode.

5. You are patriotic, dedicated and have backbone. You never speak ill of others behind their backs, nor do you frame them. You are the least dirty person in the world. You have a high moral character and will never hit anyone. You are honest, kind and beautiful. Forgive what I just said against my will.

6. You are really a tree. How simple is it?

Please don't insult my IQ with your poor acting skills!

8. There is no rehearsal in life, and every day is live broadcast; Not only the ratings are low, but also the salary is not high.

9. If you have ever learned sincerity, I think people around you will stop spitting after you turn around.

10, what apology? False comfort! Stay away from me. !

1 1. Time is the best teacher, but it's a pity that he finally killed all the students.

12, gold always shines, but when there is gold everywhere, I don't know which one I am.

13, the person who is willing to stay and argue with you at ordinary times is the one who really loves you!

14, the top of the head is as white as silver, and there is no half mark on the scale. Eyes on the ass, only clothes and no one!

15, only women and heroes are sad, only wives and jobs are hard to find.

16, I'm not a fortune teller in the square, so I can't say so much as you like.

17, I didn't expect a person to be so innocent and stupid and naive!

18, I don't remember my own worries, and I usually report it on the spot.

19, I want to be one of your teeth most, because in this way, at least you will feel pain without me.

20. Flowers often don't belong to people who appreciate flowers, but to cow dung.

2 1, the villain is shameless, and he values profit over death. Don't be afraid of others and don't care about things.

22, the villain has no knots, abandoning the roots and chasing the tail. I like thinking about it, and I think about it in anger.

There are many kinds of villains. Street villains are not the same as despicable villains. There are good villains and bad villains. Street thugs are good people. Some people deliberately do good things on the surface, that is, do bad things behind their backs, pretend that they don't know anything, but they are very happy inside. Such despicable people are bad.

24, the heart is a gentleman, the heart is not a villain; Everyone knows how to guard against him, but the most difficult thing to measure is those who say Yao and Shun, share the same aspirations, swear mountains and seas and have traps in their hearts. This hypocritical hypocrite is bound to do something.

If you are unfaithful, your relatives must be unfilial; You must not be honest when making friends, and you must not be moral when treating subordinates. Such people are mean people!

25. How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or waiting outside.

100 satirical classic sentences _ satirical sentences

1 Don't always call me an animal. Get to know me better and you will know that I am worse than an animal.

I don't know whether I went to college or the college fucked me.

I think you are a professional weaver, specializing in catching penguins.

Don't think that eating some spinach makes you Popeye, and you dare to yell at me.

Why cover your face with your ass?

If you are destined not to give me the expected response. Then keep a safe distance.

Don't talk to me because I don't understand. In others' eyes, it is foolish for me to quarrel with a pig.

On a whim, I took your photo as a computer desktop, and TMD was infected with a computer virus!

Look at your gentle appearance, why can't you speak human words?

10 It's all my fault that my son came out to steal things. It is my poor education. I'm sorry for everyone!

1 1 You are just a remainder in the division formula, and even the perfect parts can't compare with the original ones, what's more, your parts are just a defective product.

12 constipation is caused by the small gravity of the earth.

Look at 13 to see why there is famine in Africa.

14 When life viciously turned everything into black humor, I went with the flow and turned myself into a hooligan with a higher education.

15 I always have a question I don't understand. Why do people think you are a man?

16 hey, sister, stand aside, it's blocking my cell phone signal.

17 seeing beautiful women tempted, sweet words deceive people.

18 Most people only do three things in their life: deceive themselves, deceive others and be bullied by others.

19 as long as the hoe jumps well, can't you dig the next corner?

It's not that I don't laugh, I lose my powder when I laugh!

2 1 When your mother gave birth to you, you looked back!

Dinner is not everything, and you can't do anything without dinner.

Clear water means no fish, while lowly people are invincible!

You don't listen to what you say, you don't do it after listening, you make a mistake, you refuse to accept it, and you say it after taking it. Then why should I say it? !

Uncle 25, you look great, like a wooden stick.

You're not cold on such a cold day (you are so cheeky)

A big woman can't have no electricity for a day, and a little woman can't have no money for a day!

I'm not a fortune teller in the square, so I can't say so much as you like.

After the housing reform, people can't afford to live in a house, look down on illness after the medical reform, and can't afford to go to school after the educational reform.

Ask what money is in the world and teach people to live and die together!

3 1 Adults want smart and beautiful flowers on their children's heads, while others' children's heads should be just a bunch of weeds.

People can't extricate themselves, in addition to teeth, there is love.

33 clap your head to make a decision, clap your chest to make sure to leave.

34 days! The world is so crazy, mice are mothers to cats!

Mosquitoes bite your face and want to commit suicide.

Cow dung is cow dung, even if you are delicious, flowers will not be inserted in you, because that will insult the aesthetic feeling. . .

Don't come to me if you have nothing to do, let alone something!

I haven't given me a big fight for 38 days, but it still hurts.

39 piano, chess, calligraphy and painting are not good, and washing and cooking are too tiring.

The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously.

4 1 Zhuge Liang didn't take a single soldier before coming out of the mountain. Why should I have work experience?

Please don't take my tolerance for you as your shameless capital.

The one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he may be a bird man.

If something happens, don't let your feelings sow at will, or they will take root and sprout. You have to toss and turn if you want to pull it out. If the roots are deep, even Ba Dou can't pull them out. . .

If you want to mix in the Jianghu, you'd better be single! !

How long is a minute? It depends on whether you are squatting in the toilet or waiting outside.

It's a manhole plug, a manhole socket!

People say I married you because flowers are inserted in cow dung. In fact, I never thought you were cow dung, but dog shit.

The mask has been worn for a long time, and that is the face.

I'm not a fortune teller on the overpass, and I can't tell you what you like to hear.

5 1 When you see a shadow in front, don't be afraid, it's because there is sunshine behind.

You shameless woman, you have to pay back when you come out to hang out. If you don't be a mistress, I curse you for being unhappy all your life.

Which school did you graduate from? Your annoying degree has been completed as a postdoctoral fellow! !

54 hi! Brother, how can your horizontal development be worse than your vertical development?

55 University is learning!

My mother always treats handsome guys and money like dirt, and they always treat me like this.

Women refuse love with friendship, and men exchange friendship for love.

What is happiness? Happiness is that you eat fish, I eat meat and watch others chew bones.

You graduated from a school with mental retardation. You get full marks in every exam and get the highest scholarship every year.

As long as you look like salted fish, you still mention salted fish to me. The salted fish died half a year earlier. Can you turn over? Let me see. Turn it over. Turn it over.

6 1 Is anthomaniac guilty? Don't worry, even if I am guilty, I won't commit a crime against you. It's just disgusting

Don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compete with you.

63 is the icing on the cake, who wants to send charcoal in the snow?

You need to go back to the furnace and rebuild.

Don't pretend to be beautiful and happy with me and don't wish me happiness. Are you qualified?

Children regard toys as partners, while adults regard partners as toys.

I thought you were just a number between 1 and 3, but I didn't expect you to be a combination of 1 and 3.

Only women and heroes are sad, and only wives and jobs are hard to find.

I am convinced that a person will come into this world and be tortured by me.

Without hair, dandruff is more prominent!

7 1 Other people's money and wealth are things outside their bodies.

You look very refreshing! !

Interpretation is cover-up, and cover-up is the truth.

74 looks really creative and lives really bravely!

The ideal is full, but the reality is very skinny.

It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. In retrospect, I actually streaked in Too Many Cooks for 20 years.

77 Four Cowards: Stock quilt cover; Dirty money was stolen; Looking for an escort to be reported; Viagra is invalid.

78 people don't attack me, I don't attack; If people offend me, comity three points; If people force me again, I'll give you an injection; People still attack me and kill the grass.

You believe in advertisements. You are stupid to study!

what can I say? As long as your meanness doesn't affect us.

8 1 I always wander between cow a and cow C.

The world is dirty, and you have no right to say sadness.

I love you, but I dare not say. I'm afraid I will die soon.

If I lose this life, then I don't want the afterlife.

A person's death is a tragedy.

People like you can only live two episodes in a drama.

It is inevitable to blame the hand of time and write love as love.

I love my weeds, but I hate the ground decorated with weeds.

You are not a VIp, not even an Ip, you are just a P.

You need to go back to the furnace and rebuild.

9 1 When everyone can use each other, it is because they are not strong enough.

You chased me naked for two kilometers, and as soon as I got back, I was considered a gangster!

The light is on! Thank you. I specialize in helping people solve problems. I don't care about the rest!

Don't wash it, but for the mud, this broken car would have fallen apart a long time ago.

95. What are you unhappy about? Say it to make everyone happy.

I hope one day I can double-click my wallet with my mouse, then select a 100 yuan, hold down ctrl-c and then CTRL-V.

Our goal: Look at the money and earn more.

98 arguing with a MM about whether a whale is a fish. Finally, I said that the Japanese also brought a personal message, and she agreed that whales are not fish.

I finally know why there is famine in the world, because of your appearance.

100 You are patriotic, dedicated and have backbone! !