Postscript of a painful and happy book

After writing the last word of the text of this book, it seems that the accounts of the past 10 years have been settled. Over time, a sense of absurdity emerged from a little boy who just walked out of campus to a host who might publish a book. I have to sigh that this huge kaleidoscope of life has the ability of various combinations. Everyone wants to design and dream their own future, but the kaleidoscope turns irregularly. Who knows what the future is? Soon after I graduated from college, I walked out of the campus. In my simple residence in Zhoukoudian Township, a suburb of Beijing, my colleagues and I carefully calculated an account: How long will it take us to afford a 2 1 inch color TV? At that time, the popular Peony brand 2 1 inch flat-panel right-angle color TV was considered as the best color TV, with a market price of more than 2,600 yuan, while our salary was less than 100 yuan per month. We saved 20 yuan for one month and 240 yuan for one year, so it will take 1 1 year to realize that dream. We were a little discouraged after calculating the account, but we couldn't see anything wrong with the calculation, so we soon began to look around. We can't afford it ourselves anyway, so why bother? In the calculation, I should withdraw my savings from the bank and happily go straight to the mall to buy that 2 1 inch color TV. Obviously, this scene will not happen. The 29-inch color TV has already stopped at home, and color TV will no longer be the biggest goal in many of our lives. However, such a thing is clearly told to me; No one can design for a lifetime, even if it is designed for 10 years, the result will be strange and ridiculous. According to common sense, 10 years later, I should write another book like this, and the name may be "Continue with Pain and Happiness". That book, I believe, will be sharper, more outspoken and more able to breathe freely in writing. Of course, happiness may be more than pain. I really hope that 10 years later, when I am over 40 years old, there will be many problems, and I am really not confused. But I know that time will not play cards according to common sense. It's a little ignorant to think about 10 years later today. A few years ago, I heard a song called Sad 1000 Reasons. Even if you are sad, you can find a thousand reasons. What are the possibilities of life? Let go of your thoughts and think about the possibility of the next decade today. Even if it's only in the face of impermanence. All right, let's get started!

Being a teacher has always been my dream, which may be related to the fact that most people in my family are teachers. I like those two holidays, like a stadium in the school, and like the students who are always young in front of me. In recent years, while being a host, I often go back to school to be a teacher several times. Are you kidding me, kid? But I feel very good on the podium, and I often dream of walking back to campus. Who knows that one day, this idea is so strong that I will pack up the things in the TV station and walk into the campus to be a teacher who is likely to be liked by students. I think I will go firmly and there will be no farewell. From then on, it is a kind of enjoyment to slow down and calm down on campus. But at least today, I have no intention of buying this one-way ticket. However, the campus always appears in my dreams, but it may not be the story of the future 10.

★★★★ If the last story comes true in the future 10, there is still the possibility of further development. First of all, I will settle down on campus and be a teacher for life. I can't press the table here. I may have been quiet on campus for a year or two. The glitz and vanity that I didn't like when I was a host suddenly rose in my heart on campus, and I missed the so-called scenery on the screen, and others paid attention to myself. And the benefits of being a "celebrity", then I became more and more lonely on campus and began to contact my former TV partners through the hotline. This column appeared, that column was beautiful, and I went back to the grass. Maybe I will take advantage of this old face, take root in which TV station, return to my old job and continue to pay attention to my life. At most, in the dead of night, I will laugh at myself: you can't stand loneliness. It is not impossible.

★★★★ A few years ago, on the edge of the Yangtze River in Wuhan, a tall-looking fortune teller divined for me in the street: When you are in your thirties, you will go abroad! He speaks very firmly. At that time, I, a foreign language illiterate, didn't take this prediction seriously and thought to myself: I'm going out? Even beggars only know how to reach out and not open their mouths, and some may starve to death. But in recent years, my desire to learn English is getting stronger every day. Maybe one day, with a certain foreign language foundation, I will cross the ocean and there will be two consequences. First, continue to preside over or engage in other occupations after one year's fee. Second, I vowed to go out, but after going out for a period of time, I slowly broke the idea of coming back, starting from brushing everything round and becoming a new immigrant.

★★★★ There are many possibilities to continue to be a host. First, it is the most realistic to be familiar with the news field and continue to move up step by step, but there are also variables.

Actually, I don't particularly like working in a column that has been widely concerned for a long time. There is too little room for expansion of my mind and thoughts. I have dreamed countless times that I can do a program at midnight or when no one is looking. The content is not necessarily news, music, life and reading. The audience may not be very wide, but they are destined to meet. I live a very free and creative life in a certain space and a certain group of people. However, people can't help themselves in rivers and lakes, and dreams are just embellishments in habitual sex life. Whether it can be realized is not up to them. On which midnight TV screen will we meet?

I am optimistic about the future, but this optimism does not mean that nothing pessimistic will happen. I certainly believe that in China in the future, there will be more freedom of speech, an increasingly relaxed social atmosphere, and most people who speak will be innocent. But you can also think pessimistically and take it as a reminder. People often say, "If you walk by the river, you can't keep your shoes wet." Being a host is a job of eating by mouth. If you talk too much, you may lose too much. If one day, you suddenly can't see me on the screen, except that you may make mistakes in style, money and unity. Saying something you shouldn't have said is also one of the reasons. It's just that I believe that we are destined to face a more relaxed social atmosphere in the future. Even if I really make such a mistake carelessly, the leader will definitely stick to the principle of giving priority to criticism and education, so as not to ruin my job. What's more, the era of losing one's life because of ideological independence has long passed, and it's no big deal to smash a rice bowl. It's interesting and terrible to think of, but I'm still optimistic about the future. China will get better every day, otherwise, our efforts today will be meaningless.

★★★★ The fate with music has never been broken. At first, I tried to run the newspaper "Pop Music World", but in the end I entered the TV industry myself. But today, I still have a rock complex in my heart. Wei Hua, the host of the original scene, took the lead, from breathing band to going it alone. Musical dreams prevail in life. I don't necessarily like all her music, but I admire her resolute turn. So, who can guarantee that I won't be the second Wei Hua? My hobby of writing lyrics has never been broken, and occasionally yelling at my voice is quite distinctive. I don't know what kind of things or emotions it will be, so let me take refuge in the arms of music. If so, please come with me when I get to your door.

★★★★ It's actually a possibility. If you don't make progress, you will be more and more disgusted by the audience, and then you will be advised to be laid off. I have always believed that if there is such an ending, I will definitely back down before others persuade me. But when I stand and talk, my waist usually doesn't hurt. Maybe one day, I will face people's disgust, play dumb and stay where I am until the leaders and the audience order me to leave, and then I will reluctantly turn around and leave with tears.

I feel embarrassed at the thought of this kind of scene in the future, so I firmly believe that I must run away before others drive me away, so as not to leave a joke, or keep trying to prevent embarrassing scenes from appearing. But in such a competitive world, any scene is possible, and I am ready to pack my bags at any time.

Of course, since we are all imagining the future, I won't forget that we may encounter sports again. In furong town, "Come back in 78 years and exercise!" Exercise! "Shouts, often appear in China people's side, I also often hear. In the next 10 year, if we "rehearse" again, it will be a disaster for China, but dare you stand up and say it's impossible? If I exercise, I am neither a rebel nor a royalist. I believe I must be in the bard's team, because such an absurd exercise is only correct if I try to stay out of it. Of course, I won't forget it.

★★★★ There is a petty bourgeoisie sentiment on me. I have always had the idea of opening a small bar or bookstore with my wife and friends, but I always feel that I am a good hand at spending money, but I am an absolute layman in making money. Therefore, when the idea arises, it will pass. But one day, this idea will be strong again. However, I believe that it must be after I stepped off the screen and became a free man. The most important feature of a bar or bookstore is music, which is a musical feature or arrangement that is not available elsewhere. Even if it's just because of music, you will eventually have a drink or buy two books! I don't expect to make much money from this, but don't lose money. It's a smart trip to play for a few years and then give it to others. Of course, it is best to realize that couples order a lot of money after closing in the middle of the night.

★★★★ And adventure or travel. I have interviewed several explorers, and what attracted me was not themselves, but the distance they traveled. After all, I come from the grassland. Although I have lived in this city for a long time, it is not surprising that I am occasionally regarded as Renye Fang. Most days, my inner wildness is locked in a cage, but I always want to escape from the city after getting drunk or encountering some irreversible setbacks. On my bedside table, there are one magazine after another called Traveler, which I often read. I went to Turkey tonight and Argentina tomorrow night, but this is just an eye addiction. The word tourism is somewhat commercial. I prefer to travel alone. Maybe one day, I will pack my bags and say goodbye to my family, and then go on my way. After a long journey, I will return to this city and my family as if nothing had happened. But I became addicted after walking once. I was afraid that I could no longer stop my legs from traveling, so I became a person on the road. Can you stay in the city for a long time, will it be very fragile? Can I keep my family's eyes behind me?

I can't stand the nine-to-five working mode. Being a TV worker avoids this stereotype, but I still can't control my time by myself. I seldom dare to make an appointment with others for several days to do one thing, because my plan doesn't change quickly, and I may miss the appointment early. This unplanned life belongs to TV, to us who do TV. This is what I don't like. Therefore, it is entirely possible to make yourself a free man, no longer restricted by organs or departments, and become an idle person in society. At first, I may really do nothing but wander around or read books and listen to music at home, but later, after all, I have to consider the problem of supporting my family. At this time, I will naturally choose to write for a living. For many years, I have been afraid to stop writing, which is to leave myself a way out. Of course, I won't make any money or write anything. In my mind, there are countless articles that I think are valuable but not yet formed, and there are many wonderful things waiting for me to ask about the life of "the son of the East". In the dead of night or sunny afternoon, it is a pleasure to rush on the manuscript paper with a pen, which not only supports my family but also nourishes my soul, killing two birds with one stone.

★★★★ In the postscript of a best-selling book, the author deeply touched me with a sentence: "Idealists are the easiest to become decadent". I consider myself an idealist, and the motivation to remain optimistic is also in my ideal. But in the years to come, it is not impossible: my ideal is finally broken in the face of cruel reality, and the scenery ahead is no longer what we want to see. At that time, my sadness was greater than my heart died, I began to be decadent, and I began to live a drunken life. Only in my drunken tears can people vaguely see the shadow of my ideal flower. This is the last thing I want to see.

Of course, there are many, many, even fighting a war with a hateful neighbor or a certain region and going to the front line by yourself is not without the possibility of bloodshed; Even go to business; Run a magazine I've always wanted to run; Become a sports reporter; It is also likely to cater to the world trend, but still do the work of the host, no longer affiliated with any TV station. There is another way to go into politics, and even I don't want to go. Life is so bizarre. When I face the next 10 year and my lifestyle, all kinds of possibilities flock to me. Faced with these possibilities, I can only "let life wait, wait for the next drift" as the singer sings. It seems a bit negative, but some things are not easy to control. What belongs to you will come naturally, and it is useless to insist that it does not belong to you. Maybe everyone, not only facing the world, but also facing the future life, should keep a normal heart mixed with gratitude.

All this is just starting from a tiny individual life and making all kinds of designs, but who can be so independent? Fifty years ago. With the wave of Mao Zedong in Tiananmen Square, more than 400 million people in China entered the new China. Maybe they all have plans for their future. However, a series of subsequent events in New China, like a large roller coaster, threw the lives of countless China people into twists and turns, and it was not until nearly 20 years ago that they gradually entered a relatively smooth track. Imagine, in this violent roller coaster, who can remember the original dream and design, and who can calmly maintain their own rhythm and play cards step by step? I really hope there is a kind of magic that can make us fall asleep after accepting it. After a long time, we woke up in the early morning breeze, birds were singing happily in the forest, a wet fog was slowly drifting through the green jungle, and a kind and warm atmosphere was surging in the crowd. People's faces are not engraved with vicissitudes of life, without calculating others' calculations, and without suffering.

After waking up from a dream, after experiencing initial confusion, uncertainty and helplessness, we finally began to high-five each other: all the sufferings have passed, and the dream world is in front of us.

I don't know, how much sleep time do we need to have such a dream? People who are walking today may not have the right to sleep like this, but children born many years later may be imaginary sleepers! I can't tell you how envious and happy they are when they wake up on earth many years later.

I know that our generation is destined to continue to move forward and struggle in the feeling of pain and happiness. No matter how many possibilities there are in life, we are the generation that paves the way after all. However, for the sake of children, for today's painful and happy consensus, and for the sacred feeling of holding the baton, we can only choose to say to the future: Yes, I do!