Love of Zilan Weizi

Anne Baby said: "Marriage is a way of life, not an ending, and love is also a way of life, not an ideal. Therefore, for them, love can be replaced, perhaps, preferring to be replaced. "

In real life, after some men choose to get married, their attitude towards life has not improved. Their duty is to try to escape, leave all the housework to their wives, and be a shopkeeper who looks on coldly. Compared with me, women will become family-oriented after marriage, and try to tolerate some small shortcomings of their husbands in order to have a stable home.

However, concessions and accommodation will not cure the symptoms, and will even be aggravated by men, so some women can only choose to divorce and leave after seeing no hope again and again.

Zilan is a friend of mine. Her marriage process is very representative. After being married twice in succession, she was completely lost. I really don't know what I did wrong to get this result.

I met my first husband when Zilan 18 years old. The ex-husband is a romantic, who only dreams unrealistic dreams, but refuses to work hard. In the five-year marriage, Zilan followed him to leave his hometown again and again. Even so, his life is getting worse every year, even the New Year is not stable, and he has to face the creditors' coercion.

In fact, women don't want much It is enough to be with the person you love and have a stable family. However, this kind of life is an extravagant hope for Zilan, and she really can't see hope in her ex-husband. That year, her ex-husband enthusiastically said that the hot pot restaurant business was promising and begged Zilan to borrow some money from her family. As a result, the shop didn't last for two months, and Zilan was so anxious that he was bubbling all over, but he was heartless and in no hurry. He still drinks and plays cards with his friends.

Violet is really fed up with such days. As soon as I said the word "divorce", my ex-husband got a slap. If her family hadn't heard the news, she wouldn't know what kind of domestic violence she had suffered. Zilan was frightened by her ex-husband's fickle feelings. She would rather bear half the debt than get a firm divorce. Thanks to her brother's support, she finally went through the formalities.

After the divorce, with the help of her family, Zilan opened a grocery store, and her life was fragmentary but full. During the period, someone introduced her to someone, but they were all declined, feeling that their current situation was not suitable for dragging others down.

After three years of hard work, the debt was finally paid off, and Zilan finally had the confidence to face the future. She was introduced to her current husband. He is an ordinary worker in a mold factory. He divorced because his ex-wife was too poor and loved rich people. His daughter lives with his ex-wife He pays 1 0,000 yuan for maintenance every month.

To tell the truth, among several blind date objects, the husband's condition is not good, but Zilan, who has experienced a marriage, doesn't want to toss again, so she chooses him who looks honest. During the relationship, her husband asked her if she was caring and attentive, and she couldn't help but go back for a few days every month. Her husband cooked brown sugar and Jiang Shui tenderly, and bought a warm baby. These little details moved Zilan, knowing that she has been with her ex-husband for seven years, and she has never enjoyed such care.

With the gradual progress of feelings, the two naturally got married. The husband divorced, the property went to his ex-wife, and he rented an attic to live in. When he remarried, he wanted Zilan to move in. However, Zilan believes that since she remarried and really lived, she will definitely plan to have children in the future. She couldn't let the children live in such a bad environment, so she rented a new apartment.

After the real cohabitation, the husband's small shortcomings appeared. He scrimps and saves, buys food and cooks for three meals a day, and wears several sets of white work clothes all year round. When getting married, Zilan bought him clothes, and he only wanted to change them when attending important occasions. Even if the couple go shopping together, they have to bend down to pick up a drink bottle and take it home to save money.

At first, Zilan couldn't stand it, but later she got used to it. She thought that her husband was being cautious, just to buy a house early and have a real home. Knowing that her husband attaches great importance to money, she respects her husband's decision and accepts her husband 1 000 yuan every month for family use, and keeps the rest of her salary.

It was not until that day that Zilan accidentally saw her husband's ex-wife's circle of friends that she knew she was wrong. Because the stepdaughter needs to contact, Zilan added friends not long after marriage, but it is usually the husband who picks up the children, so there is little interaction in essence.

The circle of friends sent by my ex-wife is very intriguing: "The gift from my divorced ex-husband is so thoughtful." The picture of the sun is a gold bracelet and a shopping invoice. The price of more than 10 thousand makes Zilan dare not think about it. When she got married, she asked her husband to give her a gift, but he carefully selected it for a long time before buying her a silver necklace of more than 200 yuan, and said that feelings don't need to be measured by money.

Now sharp contrast, violet heart suddenly enlightened. In fact, her husband still has feelings for his ex-wife She knew it, but she just refused to admit it. The rice, noodles, grain and oil from the ex-wife's house were delivered by her ex-husband on time. Even when his ex-wife was ill, he accompanied her to make infusion bottles. Zilan protested before, but her husband said that his ex-wife was in poor health and her mother's family was not here. If he helped more, her daughter would suffer less. All the starting points are for children, so Zilan won't be suspicious.

My husband went to work overtime temporarily, and Zilan was very angry and planned to wait until he came back to settle accounts. As a result, she didn't come home until midnight. From the smell of wine on her body, she smelled a bad smell. When asked, she really just got back from her ex-wife's house. The husband looks innocent. He said that if his daughter called to invite him, it would break the child's heart. As for the gold bracelet, his ex-wife took his bank card and bought it privately.

Zilan does not accept this explanation. A man who is seven feet tall is not as strong as a woman. I never trust her when I think about how much money her husband has. In fact, in the final analysis, it is to defend her. Taking advantage of this opportunity, Zilan insisted on letting her husband know his family background and checked his WeChat bill. I really don't know, as early as a year ago, the monthly support for his stepdaughter has been raised to 2000 yuan, and he didn't mention anything to himself.

That night, the two had a big fight, and the husband showed his innocence. He said that the price is high now, and it is not enough to give his daughter 1000 yuan, and it is not easy for his ex-wife to earn money, so he subsidized two more girls. The more sincere her husband said, the more sad Zilan became. He can put himself in the shoes of his ex-wife and daughter, but he never thought about it. Is it enough to give his wife 1000 a month? Is it easy for my wife to get up at five o'clock every night and run the shop alone?

Zilan decided to quit when she saw the photo her husband just took tonight. The husband held his ex-wife in one hand, his daughter in the other, and the three heads met to blow out the candles. The picture is very warm, just like a happy family of three. It's a big joke to think that they are happy together but worried about him at home.

At Zilan's insistence, the two divorced, which showed that her husband was unwilling. However, if I had known why I remarried today, why should I be very much in love with my ex-wife? No woman will be generous. It's just the thought of another unhappy marriage that makes Zilan confused. Is her good character a weakness?

Emotional message from the sound of rain: It is said that all happy families are similar, and each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. In real life, it is not difficult to find a strange phenomenon. Some unruly and willful women are almost unreasonable, but they can control their husbands, while those gentle and sensible women are not taken seriously by their husbands.

As the old saying goes, "A crying child has milk to eat", and excessive obedience is not a good thing. Most men are restless. If life is too quiet, he will look for novelty and excitement. If he can see through his wife's card at a glance and is eaten by him, then he will ignore you.

Although marriage requires husband and wife to jointly run a business, in real life, women often pay more than men, and men's mentality has changed from gratitude at first to being used to it, and then to turning a blind eye. The less emotion and energy he put into this family, the less he can feel responsible and involved.

So you can't give a man too much freedom and space. When he emphasizes these aspects, you should be careful of his behavior. Using his income to build this family together, he will feel a sense of accomplishment invisibly. As he invests more and more, he will pay more and more attention to his hard-earned money, and he will gradually be inseparable from this family and you.