Reread Lagerstroemia indica

After reading your detailed description, I think you are a very spiritual girl (right? You have said several times that you are easily influenced by the environment. I want to remind you that the environment is really important to people's growth and development, which can't be ignored, but personal consciousness and self-discipline are more important than the influence of the environment! Only with the spirit of self-consciousness and self-discipline can we have the determination and perseverance to do a good job. You may just lack this spirit, so you often have a head and a tail, wake up a little and often blame yourself. I have been living in this strange circle. I feel very tired and annoyed myself, but I just can't jump out of this strange circle! I hope you can quickly establish the spirit of self-discipline and be strict with yourself, and you will feel that your mental outlook will be greatly improved. Besides, you must never shut yourself off. You should get in touch with people around you and get along with them more, which will also help to change your shortcomings.