Bridal chamber culture

The custom of disturbing houses seems simple, but it has a long history and far-reaching influence. From the scope of influence, it can be said that it is all over the country; Since its existence, it has almost run through the whole feudal society and has been popular until modern times. Because this custom takes the bride as the main funny object, it is also called "teasing the bride" and "playing the bride", and it was also called "playing the woman" in the old society.

The custom of haunted house began in the pre-Qin period of Han Dynasty, and the wedding was simple and solemn.

Confucius described the wedding scene at that time in the Book of Rites. Ceng Zi asked and said, "If you marry a woman's house, you won't put out the candle for three days." If you get married and go home, you will miss your loved ones if you are unhappy for three days. "It reflects the simple habits of pre-Qin weddings, and there is no scene of making a scene. After entering the Han Dynasty, the social economy developed by leaps and bounds. People are no longer satisfied with the old-fashioned, boring wedding ceremony, no longer stick to the old adage of "three days without happiness", and start to do big things, which makes the wedding ceremony cast a secular festive color. Yang Shuda, a close friend, made a textual research in the book "Wedding and Funeral Customs in Han Dynasty": "Guests often drink and laugh, and their words and deeds are unscrupulous. For example, in modern times, there were new houses in the Han Dynasty. Yang quoted Chang Yan at the end of the Han Dynasty as saying: "At this wedding party, the governor's banter was used to make fun of lust, to publicize the lewdness of the public, to expose the lewdness of the new race, to be filthy and vulgar, and to have lewdness for a long time." "Thus, from the beginning of its appearance, it was regarded as a bad habit.

There are two views on the origin of the custom of disturbing houses in China. One theory stems from exorcising evil spirits and avoiding disasters. According to legend, a long time ago, Zixing came down to earth one day and met a woman dressed in linen on the road, following a group of wedding procession. Seeing that the devil was waiting for an opportunity to do evil, he followed him to the groom's house, only to find that the woman had arrived first and hid in the bridal chamber. When the bride and groom were about to enter the bridal chamber after worshipping heaven and earth, Zixing stood at the door and refused to let them in, saying that there was a devil hidden inside. They asked him how to exorcise demons. He put forward: "The devil is most afraid of many people, and the devil will not dare to do evil." So, the groom invited people to laugh in the bridal chamber and drive away evil spirits with laughter; Sure enough, in the fifth watch, the devil finally escaped. It can be seen that the noisy room was shrouded in the color of exorcism and disaster avoidance from the beginning.

The custom of exorcising evil spirits in bridal chambers is spread all over the country. Before the couple enters the bridal chamber, in the middle and lower reaches of the Yangtze River, the groom must sleep in the bridal chamber the night before, and ask two girls to take a photo of the bridal chamber with red candles in their hands in advance; Tianjin people ask the blowing team to blow in the new house for good luck. It is still very important to drive away the evil spirits in the house after the newcomers enter the house. For example, in the East, when the groom enters the house, he will symbolically shoot an arrow in every corner of the new house, or make a virtual knife in every corner with a single knife in his hand, singing "Kill the demon once, twice, the first three times, the god four times, and leave quickly." A more common custom is to build ever-burning lamps in new houses. This is what the so-called "wedding night" means. Some scholars have studied that the custom of "listening to the room" is actually a protective measure to prevent ghosts from entering the bridal chamber.

Another view on the origin of haunted houses is that haunted houses first appeared in the north, and at first they were mainly grooms, which is probably related to the living habits of the northern nationalities. They make a living by hunting and nomadic, which makes men very tough and brave. It can be proved that a man is a qualified gentleman who can stand being beaten when he is newly married.

Some backward ethnic groups in the world show their men's qualifications by self-mutilation and abuse, and even take the hunted heads as courtship tokens, which is probably the same. The haunted room retains this primitive custom in ancient times. Making a bridal chamber is an indispensable part of a traditional wedding, which can be regarded as the climax of the wedding. Every place has the custom of making a bridal chamber. There are other meanings besides amusing. It is said that foxes and ghosts often haunt the bridal chamber, which can drive away evil spirits and enhance people's yang, so there is a saying that "people are not haunted." In a positive sense, it can increase the lively atmosphere and control the cold feeling, so some places are also called "greenhouses". In the past, the combination of men and women was mostly introduced by people and they were not familiar with each other. Making a new house can help them get rid of strangeness and make a good start for their newly married life. In addition, it can also make friends and relatives familiar with each other, show the prosperity of the family and enhance the feelings between friends and relatives.

Making trouble in the bridal chamber is "three days regardless of size." The parents of the bride and groom are often teased by others and even the younger generation. Don't be angry at being teased, so as not to spoil the festive atmosphere of the wedding. Of course, people who make trouble in the bridal chamber should not go too far. The time should not be too long, so as not to affect the rest of the newlyweds. In particular, don't hiss and cause unpleasant things. It is often reported that the bride and groom are physically and mentally injured because of the bridal chamber, and even the bride is injured and paralyzed, so the bridal chamber has exceeded the limit. We should take this as a warning.

Legend has it that the bridal chamber is an important part of rural marriage customs in Baqiao area of Guanzhong, Shaanxi Province. The bride and groom and a group of young people in the village, big and small, laughed heartily for three days. Generally, on the wedding day, the bride and groom are afraid that no one will make trouble in the bridal chamber. Because if no one makes trouble in this bridal chamber, it means that the master's hometown is not good and no one is dealing with you. If it goes too far, people will not stand it. There are "literary troubles" and "martial troubles" in the bridal chamber. The word "bridal chamber" appeared very early, but at first it didn't mean the new house for marriage. According to legend, a late bloomer in the Han Dynasty once wrote a poem "Changmen Fu", describing that Empress Chen, who had fallen out of favor, learned that Emperor Wu promised to die in the future, so she waited hard. However, it was too late and I didn't see the king's favor, so I wandered alone and had to "hang the bright moon to look at myself and get married all night." The new house here does not refer to the newly married one, but to the deep and luxurious bedroom. In the Northern Zhou Dynasty, there was a sentence in Yu Xin's poem "Singing and Dancing Three Rivers", which said that the bridal chamber was full of flowers and candles, not a new house. In the Tang Dynasty, the word "bridal chamber" was frequently used to refer to the place where men and women fell in love, so as to describe "boudoir love". For example, "Fallen leaves flow to the Jade Terrace, and the bridal chamber opens at night in cold and autumn" (Shen Quanqi's Ancient Songs), "Don't play the Qiang flute to scare the neighbors, and don't make trouble in the bridal chamber with the pipa" (Joe's Advocating Women to Walk) are all examples. These "bridal chambers" don't just refer to newlywed bedrooms. Due to the popularity of Buddhism in the prosperous Tang Dynasty, the bridal chamber was also used to refer to the monk's mountain house. Wang Wei has a poem "Deep bamboo is hidden in the bridal chamber, and spring scenery is heard in the clear night" ("Lan Ruo's Taoist Master").

It was not until the middle Tang Dynasty that the bridal chamber gradually expanded to the wedding room. The poet Zhu Qingyu left a well-known poem in the poem "Try Zhang Jishui Department": "The bridal chamber stopped the red candle last night and waited for the morning to visit menstruation." "Ancient and modern novels: Today's angry lover": "They worship heaven and earth, their husbands and mothers, and then after the ceremony, they are sent back to the bridal chamber for a wedding banquet." Hong Shen's The Mystery of the Rich, Act II: "Twenty years ago, men and women always talked about love after entering the bridal chamber." Hong Mai, a poet in the Song Dynasty, wrote a famous sentence in Rong Zhai's Essays, which was handed down to later generations: "Wedding night, be the first time". Since then, the bridal chamber has gradually become a special name for newlyweds' new houses, which has been used ever since. The so-called "beating" is even more thrilling. There are some technical terms borrowed from rural cuisines, such as "holding onions", "picking leaven heads" and "linking rings", which refer to pulling lanterns. In the dark, everyone wraps the bride and groom together, and you push and shove them. Of course, many people steal the bride's nipples and grab her buttocks and thighs. "Picking the yeast head" is to let the groom reach out and grab the sensitive part of the bride in public ... In short, it belongs to the category of sexual enlightenment. It is mainly to make trouble on the wedding night, so that some people who have a preliminary understanding of sex can implicitly and boldly introduce the primary sexual skills to the bride and groom, and also let some unmarried boys accept sexual enlightenment. This is a way to popularize sex education in an era when one's mind is confined and one talks about transsexuality.

When I was a child, I visited a "Wennao" new house in the countryside, which is still fresh in my memory. That is to say, six or seven married young people led more than two dozen young men to fill the spacious new house of the newlyweds. Zhang is in charge of making trouble, and Li supervises law enforcement. If the bride and groom are disobedient, they may be fined at any time by scraping their noses, wringing their ears and hitting their heads. Others are accompanied by cheerleaders, but they have the right to make suggestions and express their dissatisfaction with the performance, and they have the right to ask the bride and groom to perform the program again. The "main trouble" person stopped and said humorously, "Bride, I'll give you a riddle: Wedding night-playing the Water Margin with seven or five words!" The bride is a member of the theoretical study group of the production team and an advanced figure in "commenting on the water margin and criticizing Song Jiang", but it can't be said that if you want to say it all at once, you will lose the meaning of joking. She said casually, "I don't know, you are broken!" " "I don't know, I don't know, I want to hit the groom!" The police officer acted like a businessman and never compromised. The bride said to the main troublemaker, "Uncle Li is good ..." "Don't call him uncle, it will be no big deal in three days. If you don't know, kiss me and I'll teach you! " Because they are all about the same age, the host said proudly. "I remember, it's hard to say, let me write it for you!" The bride drew a "shame" on the troublemaker's face with her hand, conveniently took out a mass of toilet paper, asked the young man for a pencil point and wrote a few words. The main troublemaker read in a clear voice: "It's useless to hit the ball high and rush, and it's useless to make the pulp. If it rains in time, it should be soft ..." This is the homonym of the characters in Water Margin.

The troublemaker said to the groom, "You can also guess a riddle: wedding night-name a city!" " "The groom said," how to kill a chicken with a butcher knife? You have a problem. I got the right answer with my mouth! "The main troublemaker said," It's better for you to guess with a ball and a basket. " ? It's embarrassing. "

The groom said, "aren't you going to tell everyone?" "Tell everyone what?" The Lord makes people stare big. "I can guess with the ball-Kaifeng!" "This is really carrot with pepper, white radish with garlic, and you can't see the food!" The main troublemaker said, "well, I'll make a riddle. Guess again: a long foot, a round hand, a peeling skin and pimples all over-what is it?" "It's a hair hammer!" A baby said. "Nonsense, keep your mouth clean!" The troublemaker said, "It's obviously corn on the cob, and the people below are not allowed to talk. This is a question for the bride and groom. If the dolls want to answer questions, please ask your parents to marry you. "

When the topic changed, "Listen, bride, a stick is long, half hairy and half light, and it will be stuffed into a hole sooner or later, and it will be bloody-it will hit something, and guess what?" The following people will definitely misunderstand, including me who was still young at that time. The bride deliberately did not guess, and the groom said, "What are you asking, not that ugly thing in your crotch?" "Wrong, all wet! My groom is a toothbrush! " The host solemnly said ...

Of course, the bad habit of "fighting" in the bridal chamber has gradually been eliminated, because it is too uncivilized and has caused a lot of trouble. For example, when a wedding room was being built somewhere in other provinces, a group of young people put silk bags on the bride's head and everyone rushed in, causing the bride to suffocate and die. Another bridal chamber case resulted in multiple fractures of the bride's ribs, which turned the happy event into a tragedy, and the bridal chamber troublemaker also filed a lawsuit. Although there are fewer people making trouble in the bridal chamber now, they are not so fierce, but the custom of making trouble in the bridal chamber in a civilized way should still be advocated. After all, times are different. Nowadays, young people know everything, especially those who are pregnant before marriage. They should be more cautious when they are in trouble in the bridal chamber to avoid an embarrassing ending. In Qixian, Jinzhong and other places, after entering the bridal chamber, the bride and groom sit side by side on the edge of the kang and are greeted by the "Quanfu people", pressing the bride's skirt on the groom's robe. The groom used the balance beam to remove the "red veil" from the bride's head and then quit. The bride's sister-in-law immediately took off the new shoes on her feet and put them on for her. The so-called "new shoes and new styles" means that the bride should follow the rules of the man's family and be bound by her husband's family in the future. In the Hequ area of Xinzhou, after the groom takes off the bride's red veil, he will symbolically comb her hair with a comb, commonly known as "Shangtou", indicating that this woman has become his wife since then.

Previously, after the bride and groom entered the bridal chamber, they also used the same utensils to eat and drink and carry out the "wedding ceremony". Generally speaking, the bride and groom drink a little from each cup, then mix two glasses of wine and drink in the other cup. The customs in different parts of Shanxi are slightly different. The bride and groom have a glass of wine in Shou Ping, Yanbei, which is called "Jade Emperor Wine" and "Harmonious Wine". Wenxi and other places have evolved into the "wedding face" of the bride and groom on their wedding night.

On the wedding night, there is a custom of "stepping on the four corners" in some places in southern Shanxi. The groom took the bride and turned left and right three times on the kang. As soon as you step on it, someone will chant praise: "step on, step on, step on the four corners, and the four-cornered empress will protect you." More babies, fewer women, and two husbands are always fine ... "

Shanxi, like other parts of the country, has the custom of "disturbing new houses", and the wedding night is very lively. As the saying goes, "if you don't make trouble, you will have it." There is also the folk custom of "three days after marriage, big or small". Three days after marriage, guests, neighbors, relatives and friends, regardless of generation, men, women and children, can gather in the new house and participate in teasing the bride and groom. It is believed that disturbing the new house can not only add to the festive atmosphere of the wedding, but also drive away evil spirits and bless the bride and groom with good luck and prosperity after marriage. Bridal chamber is a part of the traditional marriage custom in China. In the Central Plains, there are usually activities such as biting apples, candy, walking on a wooden bridge and singing with women. In different areas, the content of activities is not exactly the same, but it is essential to throw a bed for new people.

Saxi Bed is a kind of song and dance game performed by the groom and sister-in-law when the bridal chamber is in trouble. Sister-in-law is holding a plate covered with red paper, on which are chestnuts, dates, peanuts, longan and other things. The bride sat on the bed, and her sister-in-law grabbed the dried fruit and sprinkled it on the bed, singing as she sprinkled it. Everyone who made trouble in the bridal chamber listened to the song of the eldest sister-in-law, and the voices echoed. The laughter in the bridal chamber lasted all night, and the laughter and slapstick were getting louder and louder.

"Saxi Bed" game is a group folk game. All the actors have sex, the sister-in-law is the protagonist, and the others are supporting roles.

Because the protagonist has a great responsibility to undertake the task of invigorating the atmosphere of the bridal chamber. Therefore, the protagonist has to be carefully selected by the married family. It's as important as choosing a wedding emcee. Before marriage, the groom's whole family chooses one by one from the sisters-in-law of the same clan and neighbors. Some places choose one, and some places choose two.

The protagonist of this Sassi bed selection must first be a "lucky man" with two children; You must also be able to sing and make up words; Furthermore, you should be articulate, flexible, good at reading words and observing emotions, and improvise. In addition, because it takes a long time to make the bed and the lyrics are long, it is sometimes necessary to improvise according to the specific situation, so the person who makes the bed has a strong memory and can correctly describe what he sees, hears and scenes with lyrics. Limited by these conditions, the screened sister-in-law is naturally better.

As a sister-in-law, I am very proud of being valued by married people. They will try their best to help the groom's family adjust the atmosphere of the new house. Chinese civilization has a history of more than 5,000 years, and people still call marriage a "bridal chamber". Although human beings have transitioned from cave-like life to today's high-rise buildings, the word bridal chamber has not changed so far. I have never seen anyone change "into the bridal chamber" to "into the building".

Legend has it that this was stipulated by our ancestor Xuanyuan Huangdi.

The Yellow Emperor defeated Chiyou, calmed the war, established a tribal alliance, stopped group marriage, ended the barbaric era, and the era of human civilization began.

How difficult it is to change to monogamy in the age of human beings who are used to group marriage! This may be a great revolution five thousand years ago. For the newly unified tribal alliance, there are some factors that are extremely unfavorable to unity in the group marriage system, and there are often incidents of robbing marriage, not only for men, but also for women. Tribes in the new alliance often fight over marriage snatching. Over time, contradictions will inevitably intensify and the tribe may split again. Huangdi often frowns for this matter. He found the ministers around him, such as Chang Xian, Da Hong, Hou Feng, Li Mu, Cang Xie and others. After many discussions on how to stop group marriage and establish monogamy, no one has come up with a feasible way.

One day, the Yellow Emperor accompanied a group of giants to check whether the caves where people lived were safe. Suddenly, I found a family living in three caves. In order to prevent the invasion of wild animals, they built high walls around them with stones, leaving only one door for people to enter and leave. This discovery immediately aroused the interest of the Yellow Emperor. That night, he called all the ministers around him. The Yellow Emperor said, "I have an idea to stop group marriage. Let everyone talk about it and see if it works. " . Ministers are all called Huangdi. Say it. The Yellow Emperor said, "Today, we saw the caves where people lived. I think the only way to stop group marriage is to call tribal people to congratulate, hold ceremonies, worship heaven and earth, parents and future couples. Then, celebrate with wine, sing and dance, and announce that they are officially married. Then, the husband and wife will be sent to a cave (room) prepared in advance, surrounded by high walls, leaving only one door to enter and exit. Eating and drinking will be sent by relatives of both men and women at home, from March to forty days, so that they can establish feelings in the cave, learn to cook and learn to live. In the future, all men and women who are married by tribal men are called formal marriages, and men and women who rob others are no longer allowed. In order to distinguish married women from unmarried women, all married women must tie their unkempt hair in a knot. People know at a glance that this woman is married, and other men can't make other plans, otherwise it will violate tribal regulations. "

When the Yellow Emperor finished this proposition, he was immediately supported by Chang Xian, Da Hong, Li Mu and others. Many people suggested that Cang Xie should make a law and make it public, and this idea was quickly supported by various tribes and people. People rushed to dig caves (houses) and build high walls for their children. As soon as their children got married, they were sent to the bridal chamber after the ceremony. The bad habit of group marriage gradually disappeared.

However, thousands of years of customary forces are the most terrible forces, which are deeply rooted and cannot be completely changed overnight. Some people are not used to monogamous life for the time being. It is said that there is a pair of hunting experts, the male is Shi Jie and the female is Mu Miao. Both parents agreed to get married. After the wedding, both of them were sent to the bridal chamber. After living for less than ten days, Shi Jia began to feel that it was meaningless to stay with only one woman all day. It is best to get married in groups. You can find two or three a day with whichever you like. Mu Miao also felt uncomfortable in the bridal chamber. It's really boring to be with a man all day. It is better to be free in group marriage and love each other for a few days. I don't like to find another man in a few days. How free it is. Because both of them have the idea of not wanting to live a monogamous life, one night, in the dead of night, both of them climbed up the wall and fled separately.

Shi Jie and Mumiao both fled into the big forest, where no one lived. The more anxious they are, the more frustrated they are. I didn't bring hunting gear, for fear of wild animals. After dawn, thirsty and hungry, they unconsciously came together again. In order to save their lives, the two had to live alone. Picking wild fruit mushrooms all day to satisfy hunger. Because I got lost, I couldn't walk out of the big forest for a while and didn't know what to do. Finally, they realized that no one can live without anyone at this moment.

One day, they were really thirsty, hungry and tired, and both of them were lying under a big tree to rest. A swarm of bees buzzed over his head. The stone broke a branch and beat it around to disperse the bees. Unexpectedly, the bees got angry and stung them all over. Shi Jia found that the bees were coming out from the cracks in the trees and took out the flint they carried with them. He told Mu Miao to pick up the dry wood and soon got a fire. They pulled out matchsticks from the fire, split the tree and continued to burn. In an instant, the bee burned its wings and could no longer fly. The flame passed through the tree gap, burning the hive, and honey oozed from the tree gap. At first, neither of them knew what it was, but it smelled good. They dipped a little in their hands, put them in their mouths and licked them with their tongues. It was very sweet. He asked Mumiao to taste it again. They decided that it was non-toxic and quickly picked up some bark and filled all the honey that flowed out. They had to pick mushrooms in the forest all day and dip them in honey to satisfy their hunger. In this way, I spent a whole month in the big forest. Fortunately, it was discovered by Yu Ze, a hunting expert under the Yellow Emperor, and the stone pier and Mumiao were saved.

After tossing and turning in the big forest for more than a month, the young couple were on tenterhooks all day, afraid that wild animals would attack them. No one wants to be apart, and no one can live without anyone. Only when the relationship between husband and wife is getting deeper and deeper can we truly appreciate the taste of love. After returning to the tribe, Shi Jie and Mu Miao never separated, and the young couple established a happy family from then on. This is the origin of the "bridal chamber honeymoon" that has been passed down to this day.