How to get back together with your ex-girlfriend? Teach you a few tricks to get back together with your ex easily.

I believe many people think that breaking up is a permanent thing. It's over if you divide it, and it's wishful thinking to save it. But what I want to say is that it's not difficult at all, but you haven't found the right method yet. Next, I'll teach you a few skills to make it easy for you to get back together with your ex.

Most people don't know this, that is, the most important thing to save is not all kinds of methodologies, but the theory that you have to find the right direction for you to learn, and your efforts have achieved the desired results.

For example, some people are not satisfied with whatever they do when they are in love or looking for a reunion. At this time, you will feel that you are not good enough for each other and don't pay enough. No! In fact, this is because you don't know each other well enough, and what you give him is not what he needs at all, so he is always dissatisfied.

This is where you look in the wrong direction. In recovery, all efforts are useful, but due to individual differences, it is difficult not to find motivation and learning methods, but to find the right direction accurately, so that all efforts can be rewarded.

Therefore, what some people call "trying to recover" is actually an illusion caused by the pain he suffered when he was rejected. He will have the thinking mode that "pain represents my efforts", but this is wrong.

Because the source of pain is that you feel powerless. Therefore, if you fail too many times in the previous recovery, you are likely to fall into the pain of "learned helplessness", which will lead you to hesitate in the later recovery, not only easily miss the best recovery opportunity, but even make you afraid of recovery.

So you found out? You can't make it back, even make yourself miserable, just because you didn't find the right direction, because you ran counter to success and didn't realize that you just had to turn around.

Then I will take you to analyze how to find the right recovery direction.

First of all, you should recognize the situation.

You should recognize the fact that you have broken up. You should know that your relationship may be worse than ordinary friends or even lower than strangers. So, if you are seeking to get back together, and he ignores you and treats you coldly, don't resent him because the other person is "soft-hearted".

Because in the previous contradiction, the injury suffered by the other party needs to be cured and made up. If you try to kidnap him with morality and emotion at this time, you will hurt him again.

Therefore, don't force him to understand your urgent mood at this time, let alone show your emotional side in front of him. Because no matter how good you are, once a person remembers your emotional characteristics, it will have an impact on his subconscious. So that every time he is a little soft on you, the disgusting side will pop up in his mind when you are out of control.

So don't vent your emotions in front of your ex. Your "crying twice and hanging three times" performance will only make him more convinced that his decision to break up with you is extremely correct.

Secondly, you should know that redemption is not to "convince each other", but to prove yourself.

Some people like to use "mouth" to make up for it, and only do some fake actions with words but no practice.

When saving, we must know that "wanting to get back together" and "wanting to change" are useless. The point is what you have done, what changes you have made and what you have become.

It's important for you to change yourself. As for the change, you can definitely judge whether you are just an impulsive "disguise" from the details and time. Therefore, it is useless to always say "will change". You have to do it, improve yourself more, and let him see that you are acting and changing. Your change can make him feel your sincerity, and then he will naturally be attracted to you again.

Because the essence of feelings is attraction, and the core of attraction is value. Therefore, its own construction needs all-round extension and development. You can expand your social circle and make yourself beautiful, interesting and excellent. In short, it is more useful to take action to do one thing than to dream 10 thousand things. So, take action, develop in many ways and improve your self-worth.

In addition, recovery also needs your proper "inaction".

For example, I have a friend. After breaking up with her boyfriend, she buried herself at home and thought about the reason why they always quarreled. After careful consideration, she finally came to the conclusion that she was too blind. Her boyfriend is obviously very tired, but he has been pestering her to do this and that with her.

After getting this conclusion, she quickly went to apologize to her ex-boyfriend and vowed that this would not happen again. It didn't work out. Instead of being moved as she expected, the other party asked with a puzzled face, "What are you talking about?"

When you save it, you don't really need to solve all the contradictions. Contradictions will develop and change, so many problems that you thought could not be adjusted at that time are completely out of the question now.

For him, this relationship between you is over, and the existence of these contradictions has long been meaningless to him. Because people who break up don't want to put their feelings, time and energy into this relationship.

So it's really your own business to resolve conflicts after breaking up. In the process of your painstaking solution, it is only you who are moved.

Therefore, to learn proper "inaction", clear rationality can only emerge if we are freed from the contradictions and entanglements of emotional attachment. So don't focus on resolving contradictions and misunderstandings, but on causing emotional fluctuations of the other party.

In addition, adjusting mentality is also a key step in recovery.

In the part of psychology about redemption, the core is not to know how to control each other's hearts, but to learn how to control their emotions. Therefore, the importance of adjusting mentality is self-evident.

Don't show too much negative emotional value because of grievances.

"Expressing dissatisfaction" is indeed a means to maintain equal communication relations. But this doesn't apply to your present situation, because if you always "express dissatisfaction" and "make suggestions", you will destroy the "friendly" wall that you and he have finally built.

So you are not qualified to express your dissatisfaction and show your negative emotions. Because he used the way of "withdrawing from the relationship" to "end his dissatisfaction".

Therefore, when you forcibly pull it back, if you encounter your "dissatisfaction" again, the other party will not have the result that you want him to realize that he is also wrong. It will only further convince him that this relationship is meaningless.

In feelings, it's either black or white, and it's meaningless for you to dwell on right and wrong. Whether it's your fault or his fault, if you have to investigate the responsibility, believe me, there will only be three words "inappropriate" in the other person's mind at this time.

Take the initiative to reduce the price

Many girls will think that saving is self-posting. I feel that I have no self-esteem and I am afraid that I will not be cherished.

But the initiative is not to ask you to kneel back, nor to sell it out and inspire his sympathy. Initiative is to let you master the initiative of the relationship, but also to leave room for both sides, so that they will find you without psychological pressure in the future.

"Fear of not being cherished" is itself a kind of "weak thinking". Just because girls take the initiative does not mean that they will lower their self-worth, and your value will not change at all because of taking the initiative.

Improve psychological endurance and don't be too sensitive to difficulties and setbacks.

Willpower is a consumable, but recovery is a protracted war. So you can't try too hard to save it.

Working too hard will only raise your expectations, lead to a gap, and it is more difficult to accept the fact that you are in the wrong direction and your efforts are in vain.

In so many recovery cases I have contacted, recovery success is usually accompanied by a process of constant frustration, and there are few smooth sailing.

Because rehabilitation itself is the coexistence of pain and hope, and it is a process of growth. In this process, you will certainly face many difficulties. But you should face up to this objective phenomenon, don't be too sensitive to these setbacks, and remain moderately passive.

For example, if you send him a message, he won't reply for a long time; Or he always makes the same mistake frequently and never changes his mind. At this time, you should not care about these temporary troubles.

If you are always immersed in such a small setback and can't extricate yourself, it will only consume your willpower excessively, so it is only a matter of time before you give up.

Finally, "everything is ready", you can start the corresponding test.

You can try to interpret the language and actions of the object. This will enhance the effectiveness of your behavior.

For example, if you send an invitation to meet, he will reply to you the next day, only saying "think about it". Then you can read the meaning of his behavior first. Does he want to promise, but because of face, so put on airs? After you have such a judgment, don't jump to conclusions. You can try again in a few days.

In short, the appropriate temptation is that you need to judge the other person's "true psychology" in combination with his dynamics. Pay special attention to each other's changes, because this may affect your recovery. Not only that, you also need to be able to analyze each other's needs according to their changes. With such a set of operations, you will become the person who knows him best.

So, when you don't know what the other person is thinking, don't guess, give yourself an answer. Before you find the answer, you can get along with him normally and wait for the answer.

If you have to guess, try to get closer to the good side, which is more conducive to saving and developing in a good direction. This is the "law of attraction": if you don't think it over, things will really get worse as you think; Think about it, things will get smoother and smoother.

"You must let him know that he will be better off with you." This is the direction of recovery.

Therefore, the most important thing to save is not to save the past, but to let the other person see your future. The future is the most important thing.

The purpose of reunion must be to move towards a better tomorrow. If you can grow, improve, become better and bring happiness to yourself and him in the process of recovery, then this is your greatest gain.

Psychological test: test the probability of getting back together after breaking up.

Have you ever thought about the possibility of getting back together after two people break up? This set of test questions helps you test the probability of getting back together after breaking up. Let's try it together.

Do you still have your ex's contact information in your mobile phone?

It's five points.

No, all 0 points have been deleted.

What is the reason why you broke up?

Due to objective reasons, the family disagreed with 1.

Long-distance love, no future 2 points.

TA thinks I have a bad temper and our personalities are incompatible. Three points

There is a third party involved in our relationship.

After our quarrel, no one would bow their heads and broke up in a rage.

I think TA has a bad temper, always complaining, and was dumped by TA for 6 points.

Of the following four statements, if you had to choose one statement that you agree with most, which one would you choose?

If a person loves another person, he should love all of TA, regardless of its advantages or disadvantages. Otherwise, it is not true love. He likes 2 points at most.

Although feelings are what you want, but it depends on people's efforts, the other person's love can also be controlled, as long as it can meet the other person's psychological needs, love can guide 4 points.

Twisted melons are not sweet. If TA doesn't want to get back together, I respect the idea of TA 1 minute.

The emotional world can never be equal, and those who want to get back together must not be stingy with their 6 points.

When you express one thing, you value it more.

The accuracy of verbal expression is 2 points.

Talking to the other person gives the other person a strong impression of 1.

Are the people around you comfortable with what you said? 6 points

The ultimate goal that words can achieve is 4 points.

What do you think are your basic emotional characteristics?

Emotional, often unable to control his temper 0 points.

Self-control ability is strong, the surface is calm, but the inner mood fluctuates greatly, and it is difficult to calm down 2 points in case of contusion.

Everything is a cloud, and it is not easy to get angry by nature. My friend praised me for my good temper by six points.

Feelings are not slow and direct, but once they are unstable, they are easily excited and angry. Three points

Did you save your ex?

I saved it, but it was rejected. I didn't save four points.

No, I don't know what the other person is thinking, so I dare not say 2 points.

I saved it several times, but the other party was very exclusive, Lahei, and I don't want to see my zero again.

I tried to talk, but the other party thought we were not suitable. Hope to find happiness 6 points.

The complete version of the test questions and answers can be obtained by private mail.

I'm Chen Yu, an emotional counselor, and I know more than you think. If you are emotionally confused, you can ask for a private letter or comment.