Give you a happiness formula, which will make you close to happiness.

Li Ka-shing once said that the happiest thing was that the old couple opened a small shop and counted money together under the lamp after closing time.

Ang Lee was asked in an interview, "What is your greatest happiness at this stage?" This man is very interesting. He just replied shyly, "If my wife can smile at me, I will relax and feel very happy."

So, have you ever thought about what your happiness is?

The so-called "happiness" is actually a short-term and immediate feeling, which makes me very happy; And "meaning" is a long-term sense of value to others and society. If happiness and meaning are two elements, you can divide people into four types, which are? Self-realization, blind running, hedonism, nihilism? .

Meaning and happiness are called "self-realization".

This group of people not only pay attention to the meaning and value of the future, but also pay attention to the happiness and experience of the present. He is regarded as the person who knows best what he wants, what he wants to do and how to realize the value of life. If I had to talk about someone, I would talk about my idol-Charles Munger.

Pursuing meaning but often forgetting the present happiness is called "busy running".

Many "post-50 s" and "post-60 s" in China belong to this type. They give everything for their families, but they are reluctant to buy more expensive clothes for themselves. Their whole lives? Fight for a goal? : Going to the city, registering, buying a house, working, having children, helping children to go to a good kindergarten, junior high school, high school and university, and then helping children to take care of their children ... They rarely really engage in experience and happiness, and rarely enjoy the happiness of life.

Once you feel that you can only be happy after achieving your goal, you will keep digging a bigger "next pit" for yourself, always switching back and forth between short-term happiness and long-term anxiety, and you will be restless. This is what Li Xinpin said in the book Secret Side Effects. "Wish come true" may be a disaster! Because your goal is desire, not desire. "

Paying attention to the present, but not paying much attention to the meaning of the future, is called hedonism.

There are many hedonists around me, and the most typical one is the "moonlight clan"! Living in the present, spending in the present, I don't know the significance of saving money for the future. Although they are afraid of the future, they are also running away. The performance of escape is to constantly hoard goods and travel for comfort. ...

But ... The biggest problem facing hedonism is burnout and meaningless feeling? . They are faced with "unbearable lightness of life".

He is called a "nihilist" who pursues neither happiness nor meaning.

Nihilists seem to have reached the realm of "no desire, no demand", but in fact they have fallen into a kind of "? Learned helplessness? " In your life. If you are nihilistic for a long time, then depression and anxiety are not far from you.

After understanding the four types, will other types make you panic and feel at a loss, except the first one, and will the other three be unhappy? Next, let's talk about how to get into the happiness track. ...

For busy people, it is very helpful to increase happiness in the process of achieving their goals. You might as well try dating yourself.

What do you mean by "dating yourself" For example, tonight, you are going to read a book quietly, and suddenly a colleague comes to you and says, "Hey, I have something to talk to you tonight. Can you stop? " Most people will give up their study time and go out with that person.

We always have the illusion that "others are more important than ourselves"!

Is my relationship with you more important than your relationship with yourself? ? This is the subconscious reaction of "busy" people.

You might as well try to make an appointment with yourself: treat yourself as a distinguished guest and spend some time in your favorite way-listen to music, read books, or do something useless and interesting, enjoy being alone or with people you like ... In short, just waste this time correctly. What's the purpose of your doing this? Think of yourself as a very important person in life

Busy people want to "add happiness", but for hedonism, to "add meaning" may be called "gilding meaning"

"Don't do it for the small good, and don't do it for the small evil". Start with small things, such as helping others and participating in some public welfare activities.

Find an area that interests you and devote yourself to it in a short time. You can try to discover and take advantage of some of your own advantages. You can start cultivating one. The smallest good habit? For example, try to practice "delayed gratification". There is a book called The Road Few People Walk. You can find the meaning and goal of life in this book.

For nihilists, you can choose to "increase happiness" or "increase meaning" as the starting point. However, in fact, there are no real and complete nihilists in the world. If so, I think it should be caused by some psychological influence.

For the self-actualizer, you can be happier! You can change the question from "How can I be happy?" Change it to "How can I be happier?"

Set up a "happiness note" in your life, record five interesting and unforgettable things every week, and then ask yourself what you want to add more happiness, what you want to add more meaning, what you can do more and what you can do less.

In a word-everyone can be happier by "adding meaning" and "adding happiness".

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