Let go of the past and let yourself go; Really straight; It's too respectful and shameful.

Confucius said, "Boyi and Shu Qi did not forget and hate the past, but hoped to repay their grievances."

Confucius said, "Boyi and Shu Qi don't hold grudges, so there is little resentment in their hearts."

Boyi and Shu Qi were sons of the late Shang Dynasty. The two men first served as courtiers under Zhou Wang, and later thought that Zhou Wang was too autocratic, so they took refuge in Zhou Wenwang and Zhou Wuwang.

King Wu's attack is equivalent to rebellion. The two men took Zhou Wuwang's horse's head to dissuade him, but Zhou Wuwang insisted on attacking him. After Shang Zhouwang was destroyed, Boyi and Shu Qi were very unhappy. They didn't eat Zhou Su, that is, they didn't eat the food of the Zhou Dynasty. Finally starved to death on the shouyangshan, which was the ancient Qing Dynasty.

Confucius commented on Boyi and Shu Qi, saying that they had not forgotten the past, that is, they had offended him in the past, and they would not be sad. The past is the past.

"Hatred is hope" will lead to fewer complaints.

Confucius asked everyone to let go of the past, and his way was to "let bygones be bygones." Why let bygones be bygones? Because evil is the result of karma, countless reasons come together, and an evil thing is produced. Since the cause of evil has been changing, what's the point of holding a grudge? Even if we had a heated argument about one thing in the past, it's long gone. The cause of evil is gone, and it is meaningless to dwell on the old evil all the time. All contradictions are due to the matter itself, not the relationship between people. If all contradictions are attributed to the relationship between people, hatred will never be resolved.

The most important core of "letting bygones be bygones" is selflessness. Why do some people regard all contradictions with others as problems of interpersonal relationship? It is because we value ourselves too much and self-interest too much.

Feeling: reduce some selfish interests and don't dwell on the past, you will reduce a lot of complaints to others.

Confucius said, "What does micro mean? Or ask for help and ask the neighbors for help. "

Confucius said, "Who said Wei was loyal and honest? Someone borrowed vinegar from him, but his family obviously didn't have it, but he went to a neighbor's house to give it to others. "

"Slightly high" means the tail is high.

We have all heard the story of "holding the tail column". Confucius criticized Wei Shenggao and said, "Who says this Wei Shenggao is straightforward?" ? Once, someone asked him for vinegar, but he didn't have it at home but didn't tell anyone directly. He ran to his neighbor and asked for vinegar, then gave it to him. In Confucius' view, the practice of heightening the end is not straight.

Straight, there is truth and falsehood, some people are really straight, and some people are fake. False straightness means taking straightness as political capital. In ancient times, many civil servants belonged to the category of insincerity and directness. There is a saying that "fighting to death with arms, remonstrating to death with words".

What is true straightness? There is a saying that "the straight heart is the Dojo", and the true straight heart is unintentional and unintentional. "If I don't care about anything, why doesn't everything always revolve around me?" If you don't care, when others ask you for vinegar, you won't hide anything and nothing; But if you don't want to borrow vinegar because you are afraid of offending each other and worrying that they will misunderstand you, then countless ideas will be born in your head in an instant. At this time, you will "ask your neighbors for help". How tired it is to be alive!

If a person is true, he will not care about others' evaluation of him, whether it is high or low, will not deliberately please others, and will face everything with a realistic attitude. In this way, the whole life will become more calm, concise and comfortable.

Feeling: Facing everything with the attitude that fact is everything, not caring about other people's comments and not trying to please others, life will be simpler and more comfortable.

Confucius said, "Zuo Qiuming is ashamed of his clever words, good manners and full respect, and Qiu is ashamed of it. If you hide grievances and make friends with others, Zuo Qiuming is ashamed and autumn is ashamed. "

Confucius said: "rhetoric, flattery and respect are so low that Zuo Qiuming despises such people, and so do I;" Obviously, I already hate a person, and I pretend to be friendly to him. Zuo Qiu-ming disdains such people, and neither do I. "

"Flattery" refers to a person who smiles at everyone, is a little too flattering, respectful to the extreme, and even grovelling. Zuo Qiuming didn't like such people, and neither did Confucius.

"Being friends with resentment" means hiding your resentment when you obviously hate someone but are deliberately nice to him. The "friend" here is a verb, meaning to associate and please.

In fact, there are many such hypocritical phenomena today. After listening to Confucius, we may think that it is easy for him to stand and talk, because Confucius is an intellectual and an official. With so many students around him, he doesn't need to please anyone. But ordinary people, such as a salesperson, need to sell their products to customers. How can they do business without good relations?

In fact, senior salespeople and junior salespeople are different. Low-level salespeople are often "eloquent and respectful", but truly high-level salespeople can have an equal dialogue with customers, so that customers can feel its discretion and education, and customers are willing to make friends with him and become spiritual friends with him. In life, many people have become friends with people who sell things to themselves, and such salespeople have a higher level of accomplishment.

Even if you can't do it for a while, you shouldn't deny Confucius. We can work towards a higher level. Confucius is not a man who aims at fame and fortune. But in real life, many people may have to be "eloquent and respectful" in order to make a living. We should also be considerate and tolerant of them, but we must be clear that this is by no means a good thing.

People always develop in a better direction. At first, you may have to "earn money on your knees", but everyone should keep practicing and learn to earn money standing up.

Feeling: Don't think that you can win the list by drinking and washing the sauna with customers. Learn to communicate with customers on an equal footing and become friends. Learn to earn money standing up.