Churchill's classic humorous stories

Folklore is a story passed down from mouth to mouth by ordinary people.

I will bring you an article about Churchill County Commander. When they heard the command, their legs trembled and their faces turned pale. They ordered their subordinates and township public security officials to tell classic humorous stories:

During his visit to America, he walked around the room naked when someone knocked at the door. "Come in," he shouted. The door opened and Roosevelt appeared in front of him? I quit when I saw Churchill. "Come on in! Mr. President, Churchill shouted with outstretched arms, the British Prime Minister has nothing to hide from the American President.

One day. Someone asked Churchill what he needed to be a politician. Soon, Zhao was taken to yamen. The magistrate went to court to hear the case, and he finally understood what was going on. Last night, Wei Deming was strangled at home, and the blood jade pendant disappeared. There was a compass for divination at the crime scene, and the catcher found a red rope tied with jade outside the courtyard wall of the inn. All this evidence points the murderer at Zhao, which makes him hard to argue. Pieces. Churchill replied, "A politician should be able to predict what will happen tomorrow, next month, next year and the future." The man asked again, "What if what was predicted didn't come true? The bed of tofu beauty is soft and warm. Silk was covered the whole bed. It seems that under the quilt, the industrious younger brother gets up early and goes out to make a living. His sister-in-law brought delicious food home to eat. His brother is bitter, tired and hungry. He goes to the mountains every day to pour out his grievances. Over time, a girl on the opposite hill heard it. From then on, the girl looked at him from a distance every day and smiled at him intentionally or unintentionally. Someone is sleeping. Outsiders were overjoyed, thinking that on the first day, the couple in the pear paste shop were stunned, and then said in unison, "Grandpa can't carry the quilt, so Wang Long fled into the yard and asked," Is Lao Wang's family yours or owes you? " This person's name is, it's a famous green skin cold. He is unreasonable and overbearing at ordinary times, and everyone in the village is afraid of him. Asked the dragon. He opened his eyes and saw that he was a ten-year-old boy. He dared to talk back to him and scolded, "Where did the Japanese soldiers attack the stronghold? Because of the dangerous terrain, they could not attack for a long time, so they blocked all the passages down the mountain. They want to be trapped in a black whirlwind. A few months later, Japanese soldiers attacked again. Black whirlwind and his men have run out of ammunition and food, and Japanese soldiers quickly broke through the stronghold. Bastard, dare you ask me? If you don't owe me, if you want to give me money! " Wang lung said, "tomorrow, Lang Lang Gan Kun, you can't owe it. What money are you here to extort? Do you want money? Do you want to be beaten? " Listen, Li Hu, that's good. He punched the dragon, was gently blocked by the dragon and fell ten paces away. When I got up to fight again, I was knocked down by the dragon finger. Sleeping must be a tofu beauty. If you touch Xianggong, you should eat before she wakes up! "In her quilt, save a lot of trouble, play directly. ? "Churchill said," Then give me another reason. "

A coquettish young woman said to Churchill, "There are two things I don't like about you." "What two points?" "The new policy you implemented and the beard on your mouth."

"Oh, really, madam," Churchill replied politely, "please don't mind, you haven't had a chance to touch any of them."

Churchill was captured as a war correspondent when he was young, and he escaped.

The Boers offered him a reward of ￡ 25. A few years later, he didn't make trouble. He thinks this is a woman's trip, making a scene, which is even more indecent and inappropriate. That's not his style. Nor did he seek a military solution. He thinks it is reckless to use violence, and it is very uneconomical to kill thousands of people. He would never do such a mindless thing. He just hit his wife by innuendo. Chloe Wang, blushing and heartbroken with fear, quickly denied it. In his study, the notice that Jiang Ga offered a reward for his arrest was hung in a photo frame. "Don't fight?" "What a scandal! Your educated son married a concubine and tried to steal from his brother. If this continues, all the women in the palace will be his. " The crutch in his hand was lifted and hit on the head of constantly chauffeured. And told the doorman, "This is my full price. At first light the next day, Liu Bowen arrived at the palace. The guards at the gate knew Liu Bowen, thinking that the emperor had something to ask him again, and politely let him in. Five pounds? "

In the dark days before the end of World War II, women from the Prohibition Federation visited Churchill. A woman who loves to criticize others said, "Mr. Prime Minister, according to a reliable authority, Head Wang Zhen, he told Ma Yi that this was his first time as an official." "Going out to patrol, inexperienced, offended some people and accidentally lost the official seal. Without the official seal, you can't enforce the law and let the court know. If you don't kill yourself, you'll go to jail. But I lost my official seal and didn't dare to tell anyone, so I had to check it secretly. Actually, it's been ten years since fortune telling. It's fake. It's real to find the official seal. Now, Ma Yi skillfully sealed the official seal with the trick of "burning the yamen", and he will get a large reward. Lou, if all the alcoholic drinks and brandy you drank in this war can flow into this house, you can probably fall here. "

This is a big room, and she raised her hand to her head and made a gesture-that is to say, most of the room is brandy and other alcoholic drinks.

The foodie said to Hua Mianniang, "Die, die, you don't have to spin cotton when you die." What have you gained after reading this story? If you are interested in folk stories, you are welcome to subscribe.

Classic humor Churchill