Why is it so difficult for boys to take off the bill (why on earth is it so difficult to take off the bill)

Come on, it's been 202 1 year, and some people still feel miserable about being single? If you ask me, being single is good, being single is beautiful, and you can be good with whoever you want. Let's go, friends are all over the world, and there is no bondage or fetter to do anything. Isn't wonderful delicious?

Indeed, when it comes to being single, we usually associate it with loneliness. But in fact, there are still many people who actually enjoy being single. Therefore, in order to further understand the real life state of this group, explore the reasons why they choose to be single, and how their psychological state is, we launched a survey on "My Single Life".

225 singles participated in this survey, including women 177 and men 48. In terms of age distribution, the respondents are mainly between the ages of 25 and 29.

* The data samples used in this article are from the fan base. If this data is used to infer the situation of other groups, it may be biased.

In order to distinguish the different reasons for being single, we first divide singles into two types:

According to the respondents' feedback, more than 30% (33.78%) are actually single. We further explored the reasons why they didn't want to take off the bill, and found that the most selective option was "like the state of living alone, simple and free (48.00%)"

(For the "other" option here, we have checked the contents filled in by the respondents, including reasons such as "difficult to say" and "unclear", and will not analyze it for the time being)

Is a person's life so attractive? Indeed, according to research, a person's life does have many benefits.

Single people have more time to exercise than those with partners. They are less likely to see a doctor and are healthier. Being single is more attractive than not being single. They have more contact and closer ties with their friends. Single people have more time and experience to spend at work, and they are more likely to achieve success and promotion. As a lovely fan said, it is troublesome to have money to fall in love, but it is not troublesome to be single! I can't help sighing that the world is awake! )

Then, for people who are passive and single, why do they want to take off their bills but can't? What is the reason why I want to take off the order but fail again and again?

We asked all passive single respondents what they thought was the biggest difficulty in getting rid of being single.

46.94% people think that it is "the small circle of life and the lack of ways to know people" that leads them to take off the order.

But u 1s 1, "the life circle is small and there is no channel" is actually caused by their lifestyle. Under the "favorite entertainment" option, most passive singles like to spend their time on "one person's activities".

Compared with other forms of entertainment, this lifestyle almost blocks the possibility of contact with others. Therefore, for passive singles, the biggest difficulty in getting rid of order may not be "no channels", but their own way of life, which determines that it is difficult for them to meet new people.

However, from the survey results, in fact, some single friends will actively participate in activities, so why is it still difficult to take off the bill?

On the topic of "What do you value most when choosing a partner?", the top three options are three views fit (15.45%), personality (14.97%) and personality (14.26%). It can be seen that most singles pay attention to some abstract and difficult-to-quantify comprehensive conditions, while quantifiable standards, such as academic qualifications and economic level, are rarely mentioned.

In real life, when people use some abstract criteria to choose a spouse, it may be more difficult than using quantifiable criteria to find a partner. (but it's not bad ~)

In addition, we also found that although many people "want to take off the order", they may actually lack motivation and it is difficult to really take action. In the ranking of important life options, only 2.67% people put love first.

When talking about "how to solve the physiological demand", more than 40% of users said … "There is no such demand"! ! Boy, I said I wanted to take off the bill. The psychological and physical driving force of taking off the bill is far from enough, so it will naturally not be very effective!

Of all the respondents, only 3. 1 1% are facing frequent emotional collapse. As many as 47.56% people said that their mental state was positive most of the time.

Bianchi once pointed out in his research that single people are more likely to get emotional self-satisfaction than non-single people. This is because once single people meet their own needs, they can reduce negative emotions. But for people with partners, the more self-sufficient, the more depressed they will be because the other person does not take care of their own needs.

Nevertheless, being single for a long time may bring some negative effects.

In view of these potential negative effects, we have prepared some practical tips for everyone to "prescribe the right medicine"! (Of course, if you are a staunch celibate and fully enjoy your single life, you can watch the fun ~)

Step 1: major rectification of mate selection standards

Dr. Helen Fisher believes that in the process of human growth, a "love map" is formed, which lists the characteristics of your favorite partner. This love map will guide people to find the other half.

But! The reality is that it is difficult for you to find someone who meets all your requirements. Therefore, it is necessary to distinguish the priorities of your mate selection requirements.

Then, make appropriate choices according to the priorities you listed. When looking for a partner, "appropriateness is more important than perfection". As long as the other party can meet the "core requirements" of all your requirements, if the other requirements are not met, it will not have much impact on your relationship ~

Step 2: Multi-channel development

First of all, don't refuse those opportunities of "taking the initiative to send it to your door". For example, if your parents want to introduce you to a friend, you can meet him as a friend first. Maybe you can really meet the right person, or maybe you finally meet other suitable people through ta.

Then, according to your hobbies and living habits, open up more channels to meet people: take out a piece of paper and list all your hobbies on the paper, including "things you are familiar with and often do" and "things you are not familiar with but interested in", and extend the ways to meet more friends according to these hobbies.

Step 3: Learn chat skills.

With the requirements of mate selection and potential development targets, what is needed next is the "ice-free" chat tips.

At the beginning of the chat: prepare an open "opening remarks".

For example, "How have you been recently?" "There is a xx drama that is very popular recently. Have you seen it? " You can imagine several interesting topics in your mind in advance, so that even if the other person's answer is "good" or "bad", you can resume the conversation from other topics.

→

Chat in progress: pay attention to "you come and I go"

A good dialogue can last on the basis of mutual discussion and participation, so remember to output unilateral opinions and pay attention to guiding the other party, such as "I think XX ... what do you think?" Continue the dialogue by asking leading questions.

→

At the end of the chat? No, if you want to chat often, don't have a clear sign that the chat is over, such as "I had a good time this time, I'll talk next time", which will make people feel that your conversation is formal every time and directly pull back the narrowed distance.

The correct way is to respond with a friendly expression pack (everyone is an adult, dddd), or interrupt this chat with something else, such as "I'm going to eat first". This kind of chat will not give people a feeling of being too formal (si) or rude, which is more conducive to easily starting the next chat.

Step 4: Keep the romantic faith in love.

Finally, no matter what stage you are in now, remember to keep romantic faith in love. When we are more willing to believe in love, the more we can meet and experience the relationship that makes us feel satisfied, and then believe in love more.

Don't avoid it easily because of emotional trauma, and don't give up because you have worked hard for a long time without paying back. At the end of the questionnaire, we asked you such a question: Do you always believe that there is love for a person for life in this world? Nearly 90% of the respondents answered: "I believe".

Therefore, I also believe that those of you who are willing to sail with love will surely meet the fate in life.