On "Mark"

Roommates like watching constellations very much. She often explains a person's behavior according to the online constellation, judges whether two people are suitable according to the constellation, and classifies people around her through the constellation. In addition, many people around you will have similar ideas, such as the traditional horoscope of China according to the zodiac; Or when you see a man with a Chinese face, you will default that he is serious and practical. Sometimes it's funny, but when you think about it, these "means" are actually used to describe a person. Even when introducing ourselves, don't we often describe ourselves as serious, thoughtful and good at playing table tennis?

Although there are different forms, I think these behaviors are essentially a kind of "labeling". Labeling people makes it easier for me to understand a person, and I also hope to give myself a psychological expectation based on these theoretical uncertainties, thus supporting the judgment and prediction of a person's personality and behavior.

What is the magic of labels, which goes deep into our lives and occupies our thoughts?

I thought about it for a moment, and I think the benefits that "labeling" can bring to us are as follows:

First of all, labeling may be a way to quickly establish a personal brand and promote yourself. To some extent, "label" embodies a person's strongest trait (note: this article only discusses the scope of people, not things). The descriptive language we use when introducing ourselves is actually the label we use to promote ourselves. By "labeling", others can quickly understand their personal character and deepen their impression. For example, someone introduces himself to a third party at a banquet and says, "This is a reliable person". This sentence puts a reliable label on himself, and others may think of us through this label when they need to be responsible for some serious things, thus helping us "sell" ourselves.

The second is to help us save energy in interpersonal communication. "My life is limited and I know too many people." . We are dealing with different people every day, some are close, some are familiar and some are unfamiliar. Understanding a person is a long process. Due to the limitation of time and energy, it is impossible for us to know everyone deeply. Tagging is a good way for a person to help us simplify the complex and judge a person quickly.

Third, we can urge self-discipline. By labeling ourselves, we can't help but move our behavior closer to the label in our daily actions. For example, when we label ourselves as "hard work" and think that we can do whatever we want to slack off at work, this label will remind us not to do so and urge us to stick to it.

Labels have so many advantages, so can we trust them easily and without reservation because of these advantages?

Everything is a double-edged sword, with both good and bad sides.

First, I don't deny that "labeling" has the advantage of deepening the impression, and even say that this benefit is very obvious. But can this advantage last forever? Perhaps labeling can help us deepen our impression of others and help us get an opportunity, but whether we can keep this opportunity depends on our real ability and morality. Once the truth is found to be inconsistent with the label, the brand directly falls in price. For example, Joker Xue, who has a good man, and Zhai Tianlin, who is highly educated in the entertainment circle ... so many dazzling auras suddenly turned into dust. Therefore, in addition to planting your own label, you should focus on really cultivating your own ability. The ability to be labeled is the long-term solution to preserve and increase value.

Secondly, labeling can help us save energy in interpersonal communication, which is beyond doubt. But at the same time, since it has the function of simplifying information, it means that there will be the defect of information loss. Many times, the concept of label is too clear, the definition is too narrow, and there is no room for ambiguity. This label is often biased. And man is a combination of contradictions, and it will never be good in one place and good in all places, so it is difficult to summarize it with a label. Since childhood, we have used the labels of "good guys" and "bad guys" to define others. We will think that good people are good at everything and bad people are useless. When we were young, we thought grandma was very kind, the police uncle was very tall and straight, and the thief was hateful. When I grow up, I find that this is not the case. Similarly, the labels we put on others now may not be applicable. Life is not a theory, life is colorful and changeable, and it has many accidents and uncertainties. Perhaps it is because the characteristics of the label are too clear, which makes us preconceived and biased and blurs the truth.

Third, labels can urge us to be self-disciplined, but unreasonable use may also hinder our growth invisibly. If we label ourselves as "procrastination", then when we are wondering whether we should start working and want to be lazy, we will use "Hey, who made me procrastinate?" . Labeling ourselves as "poor memory", we may take forgetting things for granted and don't need to find ways to correct them. At this time, the label will provide us with an excuse to stand still. Even if we label ourselves "hard work", when things need to stop fighting, we may continue to be dragged down by this label and hurt ourselves.

Every coin has its two sides. How to treat labels? In my opinion, label is essentially a tool, and we expect and apply it to make our life more convenient. The above disadvantages are often because we ignore our real goal and mistake the label for the purpose-in order to keep this label, we are led into the distance.

A leaf can be blind, and a leaf can know autumn. When we label ourselves, we should realize that I am such a person not because I label myself; But it is precisely because we are such people that we have such a label.

In the process of "labeling" others, in addition to certainty, we should also keep a fault tolerance and abandon the "unchangeable" solidified thought. Use labels for me, pay more attention to truth besides labels. Understand that we use labels to facilitate ourselves, and don't be superstitious about labels, which in turn will hold us hostage to misunderstand the facts.