Is it unfilial for my daughter-in-law who lives upstairs and downstairs with her mother and cooks at home not to let me send it down?

Being able to live upstairs and downstairs with your mother, so close, shows that you and your daughter-in-law should be filial people. Unfortunate people don't live so close to their parents. Your question is just a one-sided contradiction. In fact, there is no need to rise to the moral high ground to discuss whether your daughter-in-law is unfilial, because everything happens for a reason. Why this is so is what you need to know.

Everyone who is married knows that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most difficult in the world, and in most families where the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not good, the husband has not fulfilled his due responsibilities. You said here that you cooked delicious food in your own house, and you wanted to send it to your mother's house, but your wife refused to send it, but she didn't write down why not. Finally, I put a hat on her and wanted to give her a label of unfilial. This will do no good except to intensify the contradiction between your husband and wife and even your mother-in-law.

If your husband and wife get along well with your mother, generally speaking, as long as there is no conflict in time, they should all eat together, but from the topic, you should eat separately, which has nothing to do with whether your daughter-in-law is filial or not.

Secondly, you can ask your daughter-in-law yourself why the delicious food cooked at home is not allowed to be sent to your mother. If it's a weight problem, it's not enough to send it yourself. Next time, you can buy more delicious food and cook more copies, and this problem will be solved. If it's because your daughter-in-law doesn't want to cook good food for your mother, she can cook it herself next time. I believe your mother would rather eat the delicious food you cooked.

So, instead of discussing whether your daughter-in-law is unfilial here, go back and ask why and solve the problem. Only in this way can we have a harmonious family relationship.