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Social customs and habits

There are countless excellent books on business and social etiquette in China, one of which is Business Etiquette in China by Scott D. seligman. Especially if you are interested in this subject, you should consult specialized subject books. Therefore, this module is not intended to cover all aspects of social etiquette in China, but there are only a few foreign teachers you may meet in the first six months in China. Readers are strongly advised to read this unit and write as many serious notices about face and relationship as possible in the following discussion before starting this unit.

Have you eaten?

Compared with the west, inviting people to eat in ancient villages has a special and different significance. Because it is the most common form of giving gifts, it is rarely considered or regarded as a social joke that we may be used to. In China, two people should keep a tacit understanding. However, the rigid "balance sheet" (hereinafter referred to as treasure or reward) is mutually beneficial over time: ensuring a long-term harmonious relationship.

This is not a face-to-face gesture or preferential treatment except that you were invited to your honor dinner by your employer shortly after you arrived here. (Ren Qing) Being given the most accepted dinner invitation shows that you are ready and willing to respond positively to some upcoming requests and return the favor. Sometimes, you will know why you are invited to dinner, because you have provided something valuable, but it is often not. You will take the initial bath and very complicated dinner as a responsibility, and you will follow up soon.

If you are not sure what your expectations for dinner are, you should not accept the invitation (gift) until your expectations are determined. Instead, politely postpone your decision, for example, "That's very kind of you, but I wonder if we can sit down and have a good cup of tea first, so that we can talk without interference", invite the potential host for a cup of coffee or tea, and then encourage him to share his ideas with you. If you are willing and able to respond positively to the request, let him pay the bill, indicating that you accept his dinner invitation. If you think it's unfair to ask how much you paid for dinner, then the service that suggests charging is asking you, so be sure to pick up the label.

Besides its gift function, you can invite colleagues from China to dinner, make friends with you or forge a way to have the same expected reciprocity at the beginning. In China, I am not used to "going to Holland" and who is invited to pay all the inspection fees. Conversely, you have to send an invitation, and in the future, during this time, you pay the bill. Try to make sure that you don't buy much less things for dinner than you are invited to attend, nor much more than you are invited to attend. As for it, it is considered a major faux pas, which will put the responsibility on China. They may be unable or unwilling to repay this favor in a position at a later time (they rarely allow this to happen).

Gambe! And table manners

At a formal banquet or dinner party, offering alcoholic drinks is far more than toasting them to quench their thirst. After the first toast, you usually toast the highest-ranking officials or people before the dinner. You should never drink this drink. After toasting, it is customary to drink the whole thing (cheers), then straighten your arms and put down the glass slightly tilted forward, which is actually to empty your glass.

In China, which is more complicated and traditional, members with low status propose a toast to both sides of his glass, and the person below is his toast object. This is a remarkable social etiquette: the greater the social status gap, the greater the distance when meeting, and it should be the lips of the two glasses. You will leave a very good impression on the other party, and you will also give your China colleague or host a considerable face, which is lower than his first two toasts.

This is a polite attempt to taste every dish you offer. Of course, all the dining services in China are "family-style", and all kinds of dishes will be served and put in a lazy Susan. Lazy Susan will put the latest dishes in front of the guests in turn, so it is customary to wait until he (she) tastes the dishes for the first time before it is your turn. For the first time, only a small amount of food is needed for each plate. Everyone has the opportunity to taste all the dishes, which is completely normal. You get the second or even the third helping, as long as you haven't finished the food. Besides, you'd better leave some leftovers on your plate. In China, "clear your plate" means that you are still hungry and you have got enough food.

In China, it is not considered impolite to pick your teeth with a toothpick at the dinner table. After a meal, just cover your mouth and use your other hand (toothpicks are always plentiful at the dinner table). If you need to blow your nose, you should leave your head off the table, or better yet, just leave the table a few feet before doing so.

Finally, when resting and eating, be sure to put chopsticks flat on the top of your plate or at the conical end of the rest. If a caddy has been provided, this positioning is only applicable to the caddy on the right side of your plate. In any case, you should stand upright in a bowl of rice with chopsticks, because it is a memory candle used to mourn the dead, which is considered quite insulting (it shows that you want to die after your master or other guests).

Privacy and personal space

As the land area is only smaller than the continental United States, and the population exceeds 654.38+0.3 billion, privacy and personal space are a premium in China. Therefore, China's view on what is suitable for society is very different from the distance between us. In fact, there is no exact Chinese translation of private English words. This concept simply doesn't exist for most people in China, because it does exist for us.

Throughout your stay in China, you will often be asked countless questions. As westerners, we think this is very personal, even privileged information, such as, "What's your salary?" "How much did you earn in your hometown?" "How is your girlfriend?" On the other hand, you will often hear yourself say, "You are a little too fat to come uninvited, which is often an outspoken comment." "You look a little old-fashioned: you should shave." "You should dress warmly: it's getting colder and colder now." These types of advertisements and personal attack comments are not actually insulting or patronizing, but they are intended to show a person's interest in you and your happiness.

Remember, when we discuss the image of Guangxi and China, we attach great importance to protecting and cultivating their close relationship, that is, family members and close friends. However, on the contrary, it is a real network of relationships with anyone outside, which partly explains why China has a meaningful social welfare and charity organization (and the lack of this special aspect, China is quite confused by westerners. From their point of view, we seem to regard complete strangers and people who are far less in need of help as our family and friends. Related, few people don't care about public property, which can be stolen. In China, you are not a real China person unless you have four stolen bicycles. As mentioned above, Scott seligman provided Ming Enpu with the observation data of his missionary work in China for 54 years (1872 to 1926).

Dr. Ming Enpu saw that this trend was also obvious in the Chinese Empire in 1894. "Not only China people are not interested, but it belongs to the public," he wrote, which is a characteristic of China. "But all these properties, if protected and stolen, are a sign. Paving stones, square sticks and bricks facing the city wall for private use are gradually disappearing ... This is a common phenomenon in China ... Whether someone imposed and deceived the emperor, he added: "(page 73).

Although they relatively ignore public property, the value of China is above all else and the society is harmonious. They believe that the needs of the group as a whole, personal expression and personal freedom should be conquered. In public, they often show Quick restraint in emotional expression, and don't see many advantages of direct or opposite. Therefore, they will avoid getting involved in any unclear personal or family affairs. Related, and personal space and property are highly valued and concerned, community spaces or public areas, including streets and apartment buildings, especially stairs, are often dirty and often littered with debris.

On a rainy, dreary and cold spring afternoon, I just started a new foreign teacher and opened a mobile phone account. Suddenly, we heard the harsh sound of rest, turned our heads to the street and witnessed a very close attempt between the car and the oncoming truck. Obviously, a manhole cover has its own way of loosening. Before, every car turned over continuously and finally fell off completely, and a big hole was found, which was not easy to distinguish until the driver was almost too close to the middle of the road and could do nothing. In the next few minutes, we observed such dangers several times until this young colleague and I decided to do it ourselves. We left the building, watched this all the time, entered the street, the traffic was interrupted, the manhole cover was opened and put back in its proper position. We returned to China with applause, and with clear observation, no one in China ever took action to correct this problem alone, because we two foreigners just finished from a store manager.

business card

Business cards have more important social significance in China than in the West. Everyone expects not only them, but also the people they introduce and greet. If your school doesn't automatically provide you with a business card, ask if you can buy it from school or someone will take you to a stationery store. They are relatively cheap.

In China, it is considered polite to receive and offer business cards with both hands (gently grasping both ends of business cards and extending your arms horizontally between your thumb and forefinger), especially when receiving business cards and offering them to people with higher social status. When you receive a business card, take a few minutes to check it and put it in your pocket, which shows mutual interest and respect. It is very common to receive or transmit any such practice with both hands. You will find that, for example, waitresses often receive your money with both hands.

Lucky thirteen?

14 is considered so unlucky in China, so in a new apartment building in Guangzhou, the building number was changed to 13A.

Although well-educated modern China people reject superstition at the intellectual level, on the basis of pure emotion, China is still very lucky, and the fate of a country is the same.

China people think the numbers eight and six are very lucky numbers. An Bayi string mobile phone number, namely 138-8888-8888, sells for 50,000 yuan (US$ 7,000) in a city. Four, especially none. 14 is considered unlucky. In China, there is only one sound between "death" (city SI3) and "bu 14" (city SI4).

Related, the average person sees an array positioning and the main streets of the city, and 20 yuan sells him insight into your future fortune telling. Although most young people in China reject the meaning of astrology, in their daily life, most college students we surveyed said that they would definitely consult an astrologer and choose a "lucky day" for the purpose of getting married.

In view of the importance of interpersonal relationships in their lives, most people in China believe that success is the result of as much (or more) luck as possible, rather than the result of self-efficacy and hard work. After re-listing, most people in China are controlled from the perspective of external control, while most people in the West are controlled day by day in their life trajectory, that is, from the internal function operation, we think that the main success is that hard work, talent and determination have gained the upper hand in life: as a rule, China people do not.

Give sb. a present

The lucky numbers discussed above have certain cultural norms. When choosing gifts, you should remember that these occasions are the same in China, because they are in the west.

As gifts in China, the most common items are fruit baskets, candy and biscuit boxes, cakes, expensive tea leaves, cigarette boxes, and several bottles of decent wine or high-grade Baiji incarnations (distilled sorghum, the country's national drink). However, unlike the West (Lucky Seven), odd numbers are usually considered unlucky. In China, there is an old saying in China: "Happiness comes in pairs." Therefore, gifts should be in pairs or even numbers, for example, a dozen roses will be fined, but roses will not be single red.

Gifts should be wrapped in bright and festive colors, such as red, pink and yellow. Avoid black and white paper (or decorative bags) because these colors are related to funerals. Similarly, the clock (and all time movies) is considered a very inappropriate gift. In China, the pronunciation of the word "Zhong" is very close to "attending a funeral" (or death).

During the Spring Festival, it is considered as a good red envelope (incense treasure) of social money, which is given to children's close friends, important acquaintances and business partners. The amount will depend on the person's status and intimacy. On the other hand, if it usually takes weeks or even months to receive the red envelopes of wedding invitations after marriage, it is considered appropriate to include at least people or couples from 200 yuan (or more, depending on the nature of the relationship). In particular, close friends may choose gifts (even numbers) that are usually expensive at present instead of cash.

China is still visiting.

It is a custom that you should cheer up. If you pay special attention to your workplace, you must take a sick day. You can expect a small delegation to visit school staff in different States, depending on the importance you think of going to school. Usually delegations bring fruit or some other food, and they only stay for about 20 to 30 minutes. For most westerners, when they are sick and have a fever or some other diseases, what they want to do most is to get up and receive guests, but this is normal in China. The purpose of the visit is to prove the respect and concern of both sides. No matter how miserable you are, you should be kind.

Public displays of affection

The four friends grabbed a gun and crowded together as if to leave the shop. A typical scene of China.

Although this is slowly changing China, especially college students in major cities, it is generally considered inappropriate to show your body's feelings for members of the opposite sex in public places. You can see old couples in China walking hand in hand at night, because they come together, but usually, young and middle-aged couples don't do the same thing.

Contrary and contradictory, so it may be rare to see two members of the same sex express their feelings for each other in brotherly physics. Sometimes, people will notice that their close male friends (usually teenagers) hug each other's shoulders or waist. Usually, you will see two girls or women (all age groups) walking hand in hand or arm in arm. Two very young western sisters are usually together when crossing the street. For many westerners, it really takes some time to get used to this scene, because in our culture, it is usually associated with homosexuality, but in China, it definitely has no such meaning. From our point of view, this is a more pleasant and naive China culture, and we feel totally lovely as foreigners.

You slept well.

According to the practice of the whole Mediterranean countries, China people, especially China people in the south and southeast, last from noon 12 to 2:30 pm every day (in other words, two and a half hours for lunch). I will stick to this practice. In any private or public school, your job will never be arranged during this time, and your FAO will be everywhere during the nap. Many foreigners live in China for a period of time and often follow the trend. Whether you decide to take a nap in the afternoon or not, you need to remember that many people do this in China, so if you have something to do, you need to attend, which is very wise. You should do it before 1 1:30 in the morning or after 2:30 in the afternoon.

Although public institutions and facilities (post office, police station, hospital, bank, etc. ) They are technically open during the nap, but they are often seriously inadequate. Shops and businesses owned by local families will also be open, but owners are most likely to fall asleep in the back room (or on the right side of the crib shop). On the other hand, in China or the post office bank between 2:00 and 2:30, this is a great way to beat the crowd.

Looking forward to my road?

About 65% to 70% of China is still rural and agricultural. Therefore, many people in China move to cities and never take the elevator. A few people will press the wrong key (usually when they want to go down, they will press the "up" key to summon the "up" sound). Because of this, absolutely no one will stop at the elevator floor and wait. When the elevator finally reaches the first floor, it is not unheard of for those who have been waiting to rush into the elevator without first letting the people inside exit in their own way. This is a foreigner who has been neglected here for a while, and there are those small similar troubles.