What's it like to love someone?

I also slowly hit a wall outside to really have a little reflection. I feel very kind, and then I will do many things that I feel good for others, thinking that I will get feelings and make everyone happy. Why not? Even if the other person is ungrateful, it doesn't matter as long as you are good to the other person. But later, I gradually found that everyone has his own different state, even if he is really good to him, and then everyone thinks it is good to him, but if he is the only one who doesn't agree, you will be annoyed when you do it, and you can appreciate it later if you have some understanding ability, but if you don't have that understanding ability, it may soar, and then you will feel that your kindness is being poisoned.

In fact, I may sum up two points:

First, the boundary and the bottom line.

As far as others are concerned, you can't do anything for others unless they want to, even if it is good for them. Even if you stand in their position, they will blame you, which is natural. For yourself, you actually have to understand that you have a bottom line. The bottom line is that you shouldn't be nicer to others than the average person. You are not a bodhisattva, but you are also an emotional person with flesh and blood. You can only help others the most with the least effort. That's good, but it's wrong for you to try your best to make others suffer less or less. Even if others suffer or pay more, it is his own necessary training.

Second, everyone is a unique individual, with flesh and blood and personality. Even if it is right, people don't have to admit it. This is the dignity of others, you should respect it. This is the first thing you should pay attention to when you get along with others.

In addition, I think fraternity: fraternity is not the overflow of love, not the kind of unrestrained help, it is good for others, it is stupid, everything must have boundaries, but also be worthy of yourself, and you are also a person who needs to cherish yourself. Even for a stranger, when I meet something and I want to do something or say something, I will say and do it in a way that I think is good for the other person. Even if there is no benefit, or even if it may not hurt too much, it is nothing, and it is nothing to suffer. Sometimes even knowing that the other party is a liar, as long as there is no clear evidence, they are willing to trust each other and always feel that they can care about each other. People are not bad.