Humor is a stupid joke.

A collection of jokes with a little stupid humor

1, bet on killing pigs and selling tea.

The pig slayer said that the hammer won't break the egg. ?

The tea seller said:? The hammer is broken! ?

The butcher said that the hammer won't break! ?

Not convinced, the tea seller brought an egg and beat it hard with a hammer. The egg was broken. I thought it was broken. ?

The pig killer said that the egg was broken, but I said that the hammer could not break it. Ah! ?

2. A buddy is introducing his family to his new girlfriend: I am not an only child, and there is a brother on it. My girlfriend asked curiously, ah, do you have a brother above and a younger brother below?

A man went to the cabbage field to steal cabbage, and it happened that an army came to the cabbage field to exercise. When he saw an army, he squatted down, and then the army began to fire. After the performance, the army left. He got up and said, what a big deal! Fuck, put a gun on it.

The goat introduced the elephant to the mosquito as his girlfriend, and the mosquito agreed.

Mosquito's parents advised: Come on, son, we can't even afford an engagement ring. ?

5. wife:? I know you have no money. My money is on the dresser. Take as much as you want. ?

My husband thought, this is unusual. I dare to go and have a look. There are twenty pieces on it.

English: Before she got married, she was slim.

Before marriage, she was like a coca-cola bottle.

English: After marriage, she became like a bucket.

After marriage, her figure became like a Coca-Cola can.

7. I opened the college entrance examination guide and saw that it was full of schools, and every page was crooked. Excellent teacher? A few words.

I can't sleep anyway. I looked at it carefully in the middle of the night before I saw the words through the gap. You wrote the whole book? Charge? Two words!

8. The reporter interviewed a centenarian.

? What is the secret of longevity for the elderly in cities? The reporter asked.

The old man sighed. Nothing. You can't die. Death is a burden to your children. ?

9. When a person goes to tell a fortune, the fortune teller touches the bones, looks at the face and counts the eight characters, saying that you are in love at the age of 20, married at the age of 25 and have children at the age of 30. You have a rich and stable life and a happy family in your later years. The man was surprised at first, and then he was very angry. He said, I am thirty-five, a doctor, single, and I have never been in love. When Mr. Wang heard this, he pondered a little and said, Young man, knowledge changes fate. ?

10, Xiao Ming asked his father: Why do you have two ears and only one mouth? ?

Dad said: this is to tell you to listen to other people's advice more and talk less nonsense yourself! ?

1 1. Two programmers are fishing. One of them caught a mermaid. The upper part of the mermaid was beautiful, and the lower part was fish, so the programmer let her go. The other party asked him: Why? He replied: No API.

12. My husband saw a message on his wife's mobile phone:? 00229 1 000524 002467 002582? . My husband stocks stocks, and at first glance, he knows it is a stock code. Someone recommended stocks? So I checked the name of the stock and suddenly realized: Saturday, Oriental Hotel, 263, I miss you so much! ?

13, seven-year-old son is studying? The moonlight shines on the window ... Mom, whose daughter is Yue Ming?

14, I would like to be a stone bridge, let the wind, rain and sun shine for 500 years, but I beg this girl to cross the bridge. ? Five hundred years later. . . A stone bridge said sadly, why is she wearing jeans today?

15, a woman was walking in the street wearing a mink coat. A man ran from behind, took off her coat, slapped her in the face and said angrily: You won't buy such an expensive thing, you must buy it! ? Then turn around and walk away. People in the street thought it was husband and wife, and the woman was confused for a long time, shouting: rob! ?

16, A: Why do you think foreign wines are black?

Winery manager: It's not easy. If there's rat shit falling in, you won't notice! !

A: Then why is the wine in China white?

Winery manager: it's simpler, that is, there is mouse excrement falling in, just say it's distiller's grains!

17. The parrot that won the first place in the parrot speech contest is called Coco. He came out of the cage, looked around and shouted, Why are there so many parrots here?

18、? My car tire is flat again. You are engaged in highway construction. Why is our highway so bad?

? Yes, when it comes to highways, the problem is big. Once, a foreign expert came to us on a motorcycle. When he saw our highway, he was very surprised and said? The motorcycles you produce are so good, but the roads are so bad. What happened? One of our bosses said: the problem is simple: motorcycles can be exported, but roads can't!

19. A landlord is dying. By the way, he added this sentence in his will: the two missing bulls can be disposed of like this: if they are found, they will be owned by my son; If I can't find them, they will belong to my housekeeper. ?

20. A hospital should save money everywhere. Once the mirror on the washbasin in the nurse's room was broken and asked to be replaced. The hospital refused and refused to approve it for economic reasons.

Later, when applying for this equipment, a nurse filled it out on the form? Human reflector? , quickly approved.

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