Kafka's notes by the sea

He began to study specific implementation methods and make plans, but the question of whether his behavior was correct hardly appeared in his consciousness. All he can think about is how many Jews he can handle at low cost in a short time. According to his calculation, the total number of Jews handled in Europe is 1 1 10,000.

How many trucks will be prepared? How many Jews can each district accommodate? What percentage of them died of natural causes in transit? How can I finish this homework with the least number of people? What's the most economical way to deal with corpse burning? Bury? Melting? There are many calculations on his desk. The scheme is put into practice, and the effect is basically consistent with its calculation. Before the end of the war, about 6 million Jews (more than half of the target) were disposed of by his plan. However, he never felt guilty. In the dock with bulletproof glass in Tel Aviv court, Eichmann looked puzzled: Why should he be tried on such a large scale? Why is it so concerned by the whole world? I just put forward the most suitable scheme for a given topic as a technician. Isn't this what all the conscientious bureaucrats in the world do? Why are you the only one who is accused like this?

Is he guilty? Did he commit a terrible crime? A: Responsibility comes from dreams. The judge pointed out in court: "East German law requires you to kill people, but you know that these people who spit on someone and then run away are innocent. It is guilty to kill him knowing that he is innocent. As a policeman, it is guilty of not carrying out orders from superiors, but not sure of innocence. As a rational person, at this moment, you have the sovereign right to raise the muzzle one centimeter, which is your conscience obligation. The same effect was obtained. Although we are limited by the system, environment and laws, we are physically and mentally sound and we can make choices.

Not just beautiful. Yes, the stars are still alive and breathing, just like trees in the forest, I think. They looked at me and knew what I had done before and what I would do in the future. No matter how big or small, they can't escape their eyes. I once again fell into the intense terror under the starry sky, with difficulty in breathing and my heart racing. I have lived under so many stars until now, but I have never realized their existence. No, not just the stars. Besides, aren't there many things in the world that I don't know or know? Thought of here, I feel desperate. Even if I go to the ends of the earth, I can't escape this helplessness.

Therefore, we are all afraid of those unpredictable things that have been silent for a long time, far away and near. The key point is that after living a life of indulgence, contempt and recklessness, we suddenly find these great things that have been silent for a long time, just like the sudden cold water woke us up.

But you know: such a stable life will not last long. They will chase you like greedy beasts. They will enter the dense forest. They are tenacious, stubborn and cruel, and they don't know what fatigue is and what disappointment is. Even if you can endure masturbation here now, it will soon find you in the form of wet dream. Maybe you will rape your real sister and mother in your dream. That's beyond your control. That's beyond your self-control. You have no choice but to accept you.

About sex, about the potential desire of human nature, we are inevitable. Only when we have enough knowledge, we will naturally despise it, and we can get a quiet real life-starting with the boy who became a gay drug addict because of Oedipus in Red Prescription)

You are afraid of imagination, dreams, and responsibilities that should start from dreams. However, you can't help dreaming when you sleep. A sober imagination can always try to stop it, but dreams can't. (Freud's dream interpretation, subconscious, Oedipus)

Nevertheless, I still think that many parts of Tamura Kafkajun are you and me at the same time. Fifteen years old means that the heart collides between hope and despair, the world wanders between reality and virtuality, and the body wanders between jumping and sinking. We accept both ardent blessings and fierce curses. Kafka Tamura just contracted what we actually experienced and experienced when we were fifteen years old into an extreme story.

The author's preface only tells what the whole novel wants to show. After reading it, I thought of Oedipus, who was cursed, thinking that he could resist, but he only went to the curse in his resistance. Kafka also played truant, stayed away from his father, missed his mother, was cursed by his father, but went to the curse. When it was all over, he went back to where he should be and back to school. )

Kafka Tamura left home in a helpless state and devoted himself to the choppy adult world. Have the power to try to hurt him. That kind of power is sometimes in reality and sometimes comes from outside reality. Meanwhile, many people are willing to save or save his soul. He was driven to the end of the world and came back by himself. When he came back, he was not him, and he had entered the next stage.

So we know how difficult the world is, and we also know that the world can be warm and beautiful. Kafka by the Sea attempts to describe such a world through the eyes of a fifteen-year-old boy. Forgive me for repeating, Tamura Kafka is me and you. When reading this story, if you can see the world with such eyes, you will be very happy as an author.

(I saw a sentence in the author's comment area, saying that people have to pass a certain age to see that age clearly and resort to the pen. 15.6 years old, we are in the middle school period, the critical period of youth, and the shaping period of knowing ourselves and the world. We rebel, rebel, run away, think and struggle. We yearn for the world and rely on our parents and brothers. We look for friends and ask about the true meaning of life. We often think about the future, and sex begins to sprout ... However, after these years of youth, we finally return to the right track of life, and some memories are packed in a deep corner. )

Birds chirping, insects chirping, streams gurgling, leaves whispering in the wind, the sound of walking on the roof, the flow of rain, and the inexplicable and indescribable sounds from time to time ... The earth is full of so many fresh and wonderful sounds, but in the past, I was oblivious and turned a deaf ear to such an important phenomenon. It's like I'm making up for my past losses. I sat in the eaves gallery for a long time, closed my eyes and listened to the sound there calmly (as long as human beings get used to something, what they were afraid of before is no longer afraid, not to mention the unpredictable nature is always full of dangers, but it is always one with human beings. )

However, what makes me more tired is the kind of person who lacks imagination, that is, the' empty person' that T·S· Eliot said. They fill the unimaginative parts with straw and empty parts, and at the same time they unconsciously walk around the ground, trying to impose that numbness on others by listing empty words. Come on, it's the people who like those two people who just arrived.

People who lack imagination are mentioned many times in the article. From the point of view of this book, 15, 6 years old, black and white, unrestrained, should be the most disgusted with those remarks that bring us back to reality, those I am good for you, those you understand sooner or later, you are still young and you don't understand, I have experienced these, it is like this, you are unrealistic, and so on, I can't help but think that if this is the case, each of us will definitely. ).

Narrow, harsh, unimaginative self-righteous propositions, empty terms, usurped ideals, rigid ideological systems-for me, what is really terrible is these things. I fear and hate these things from the bottom of my heart-what is right and what is wrong-this is of course a very important question. But many times, this kind of individual judgment error is not uncorrectable afterwards. As long as you have the courage to admit your mistakes, you can usually make up for them. However, the narrowness and harshness without imagination are no different from parasites. They change the main body on which they live and their own shape, and multiply indefinitely. There is no hope of being saved here. As me, I don't want that kind of thing to enter here. "

"In that case, I ..." The voice lacks the necessary weight. My words were swallowed up by the blank before I found the direction. (write about a way in which a person can't hear clearly in a low voice, or suddenly falls into deep silence)

Oshima looked me in the eye: "I tell you, Tamura Kafka, your feelings now are also the theme of most Greek tragedies." It is not man who chooses fate, but fate who chooses man. This is the fundamental world view of Greek tragedy. This kind of tragedy-defined by Aristotle-is ridiculous, not so much because of the shortcomings of the parties, but because of their advantages as leverage. Do you understand what I mean? People are dragged into a greater tragedy, not because of shortcomings, but because of advantages. Sophocles' King Oedipus is an obvious example. King Oedipus brought him tragedy not because of his laziness and stupidity, but because of his courage and integrity. So this is an inevitable irony. "

"And there is no redemption."

"In some cases," Oshima said, "in some cases there is no redemption. But irony makes people deeper and bigger, which becomes the entrance to a higher realm of redemption, where universal hope can be found. Only in this way, Greek tragedies are still read by many people and become the prototype of art. I repeat: everything in the world is a metaphor. Not everyone killed his father and raped his mother. Right? In other words, we deepen and expand ourselves by accepting irony through device metaphor. " (Chapter 265438 +0: Father's terrible fable, philosophical thinking, Greek tragedy interpretation, fate interpretation, why do you say that people choose fate or fate chooses people? What we are trying to change is to develop in a better direction, but we are not allowed to face new problems and new difficulties. Should it always be in the low configuration stage? Will fate affect us like that? Looking around the world, it seems that ordinary people don't believe in the trick of fate, so? )

Loneliness piled up there like mud. The faint light passing through the water layer shines around like fragments of ancient memories. There is no sign of life in the deep water. How long has she been looking at me, or where am I? I found that the law of time has been lost. There, time will be extended or precipitated according to the inner needs. The inaccuracy of time, under the influence of emotion and psychology, is attached to Murakami's language, depicting such a vivid, accurate and meaningful situation. )

As long as you look at the smile on her mouth, you can trace the beautiful track left by a happy heart, just like the arc of fireflies staying in front of your eyes in the dark. The power of beauty, the appeal of that tension, my happiness is crescent-shaped, hidden in your mouth and your eyebrows.

Her words did enter my ears and shook the eardrum. Sound waves entered my brain and were replaced by language, but language and meaning could not be connected. (the most appropriate description when you can't speak)

"Love is to rebuild the world, and anything can happen in this world." (love)

"In that case, I ..." The voice lacks the necessary weight. My words were swallowed up by the blank before I found the direction. Write a way that one can't hear clearly in a low voice.

Oshima looked me in the eye: "I tell you, Tamura Kafka, your feelings now are also the theme of most Greek tragedies." It is not man who chooses fate, but fate who chooses man. This is the fundamental world view of Greek tragedy. This kind of tragedy-defined by Aristotle-is ridiculous, not so much because of the shortcomings of the parties, but because of their advantages as leverage. Do you understand what I mean? People are dragged into a greater tragedy, not because of shortcomings, but because of advantages. Sophocles' King Oedipus is an obvious example. King Oedipus brought him tragedy not because of his laziness and stupidity, but because of his courage and integrity. So this is an inevitable irony. "

"And there is no redemption."

"In some cases," Oshima said, "in some cases there is no redemption. But irony makes people deeper and bigger, which becomes the entrance to a higher realm of redemption, where universal hope can be found. Only in this way, Greek tragedies are still read by many people and become the prototype of art. I repeat: everything in the world is a metaphor. Not everyone killed his father and raped his mother. Right? In other words, we deepen and expand ourselves by accepting irony through device metaphor. " (Chapter 2 1: father's terrible fable, philosophical thinking, Greek tragedy interpretation, fate interpretation,)

. Loneliness piled up there like mud. The faint light passing through the water layer shines around like fragments of ancient memories. There is no sign of life in the deep water. How long has she been looking at me, or where am I? I found that the law of time has been lost. There, time will be extended or precipitated according to the inner needs. (Time misplaced, affected by emotions and psychology)

As long as you look at the smile on her mouth, you can trace the beautiful track left by a happy heart, just like the arc of fireflies staying in front of your eyes in the dark.

(the power of beauty, the appeal of that tension)

Her words did enter my ears and shook the eardrum. Sound waves entered my brain and were replaced by language, but language and meaning could not be connected. (the most appropriate description when you can't speak)

"Love is to rebuild the world, and anything can happen in this world." Humans do things for love, big and small, without fantasy, change and rebirth, and a new world begins.

Images beyond meaning stand up like paper-cuts and start walking alone, like dreams. (Just as literature is abstruse)

But its sound quality, like the spring rain soaked by flying stones in the garden, gently brushed our consciousness. The spring rain moistens things quietly, and the flying stones wet by the spring rain should be a kind of nourishment, a kind of firmness, a kind of touch and a new feeling brought by a new image.

At this point, the pain from Hoshino is extremely barbaric. A huge lightning flashed through my mind, and my consciousness went blank at once. Breathing stopped, as if being suddenly pushed from the top of the tower to nine levels of hell, and it was too late to call. Excessive pain made him unable to think about anything. All the thoughts are baked and all the feelings are focused on the pain. The skeleton of the body seems to fall apart at once. Even death will not be destroyed to this extent. I can't open my eyes. He lay there completely helpless, drooling on the tatami and tears streaming down his face. This unusual state lasted about thirty seconds. (How to describe unbearable pain)

I closed my eyes and put the girl's heart quiver into my own heart rhythm. Beautiful and miserable, my heart moves with you.

"The so-called pure present is a process of devouring the future and the past, which is difficult to grasp. In fact, all the senses have become memories. " "

The young man raised his head and looked at the girl's face with his mouth half open: "What, this?"

"henri bergson (French philosopher)." The girl said, while kissing the glans penis and licking the remaining semen, "Don't complain."

"I can't hear you clearly."

"Matter and memory. Haven't seen it? "

"'I am both the relevant content and the relevant thing itself.' "

"Wow!"

"Hegel defined' self-awareness' and thought that people can not only separate themselves from the container, but also actively understand themselves more deeply by projecting themselves onto the object as a medium. This is self-awareness. " (The world learned from Introduction to Literature and Object World)

"'I am not a Buddha, but a heartless thing. As a heartless thing, nature does not distinguish between good and evil, and does not act according to good and evil.

"Ueda Akinari's" Rain Moon Tale "section. You won't read it anyway. "

"Accurately, the stone itself is meaningless. The situation needs something, and it happens to be this stone. Russian writer Chekhov put it well:' If a pistol appears in the story, you must shoot it.' What do you mean?

"Because everyone is looking for their missing part through love, it is inevitable that there will be sadness when thinking about the object of love-to different degrees-and it feels like stepping into a room that has already been lost. Of course. You didn't invent this mood, so it's best not to apply for a patent. " The existence of things must have its reasons and functions.

"If you can open the entrance stone here, you won't have any trouble? Like Aladdin and the magic lamp, there are puzzling goblins or something, or the frog prince jumps out and kisses us tightly? Or was it eaten by Martians? "

When I was a child, my grandfather told himself the story of Buddha Sakyamuni. There was a disciple named He Ming, who was so stupid that he couldn't even remember a simple scripture. Other disciples looked down on him. One day, Sakyamuni said to him, "Hey, He Ming, your brain is not good. You can forget the scriptures. You can always sit at the door and shine your shoes for everyone. " He Ming was honest and didn't say, "Sakyamuni, are you kidding me?" Don't make me lick your ass! " For the next ten or twenty years, He Ming has been shining shoes for everyone according to the instructions of the Buddha. One day, he suddenly became the most outstanding figure among Sakyamuni's disciples. Hoshino still remembers this story. I remember it very clearly, because he thought that the life of continuously polishing shoes for everyone for 20 years was a mess no matter what he thought. This is a big joke! But in retrospect, this story has caused another kind of echo in his heart. Life is a mess, he thought. I just didn't know when I was a child (what is the cleverness of smart people? Even the Zen disciples will laugh at their peers. Why not ordinary people? So where is the chaos? Who is the chaos? I'm afraid I don't know what achievements and combing have been made in life. What is the truth behind it? )

"One by one. That's not your responsibility, nor is it my responsibility. Responsibility is not prediction, curse, DNA, illogicality, structuralism or the third industrial revolution. We are all destroying and losing, because the world itself is built on destruction and loss, and our existence is only a silhouette of its principles. For example, the wind, there are both strong winds and comfortable breezes, but all the winds will eventually disappear. Wind is not an object, but it is nothing more than the general name of air movement. The ear is empty, and the metaphor is clear. " There is no metaphor for knowing the wind (about the destruction of existence)?

This is all about love, Tamura Kafkajun. If you are the one with amazing ideas, then you must be the one wandering in the deep darkness. You must bear it with your own body and mind. Love is a matter of two people, there is no need to force it. No wonder everyone else is alone. We must know the darkness and pain it brings and bear it. )

"The world we live in is always adjacent to another world. You can step into it to some extent, or you can come back safely, as long as you are careful. But once you cross a certain place, you can never come back. I can't find my way home. Maze! Do you know where the maze first came from? " I shook my head. "Originally put forward the concept of maze, according to the current knowledge, is ancient Mesopotamia. They pull out animal intestines-sometimes human intestines-to tell fortune and appreciate the complex shape of intestines. Therefore, the basic shape of the maze is the intestine. In other words, the principle of the maze lies inside you and echoes the maze outside you. "

"Metaphor." I said.

"yes. This is a metaphor. What is outside you is the projection inside you, and what is inside you is the projection outside you. Therefore, you step into your inner maze by repeatedly stepping into your outer maze, which is very dangerous in most cases. " (abstruse, I have to admit, everything outside is bound to be influenced by our hearts. I know the complexity inside, but why is it dangerous from the outside to the inside? Is it because the external projection is not so real and it is easy to misinterpret the internal? )

I opened my eyes. I was lying in bed with no one around. It's late at night, it's dark, and all the clocks and watches are gone. I got out of bed, took off my underwear and washed the semen off it with kitchen water. Like a bastard born in the dark, white and sticky. I drank several glasses of water in one breath. No amount of drinking can quench your thirst. I am really lonely. In the endless darkness of midnight, surrounded by forests, I will always be lonely. No season, no light. I turned to bed, sat on the bed and took a deep breath. Night hangs over me.

Now, what is vividly displayed in your body. It stays there like a shadow. The shells disappeared without a trace and were completely destroyed. You have something sticky on your hand, like human blood. You put your hand in front of your eyes, but there is not enough light to see what it is. It's too dark inside and out.

(Men and Boys)

(theory of yin-yang and five elements of human body)

"Then I want to ask: Do you think music has the power to change a person? For example, what will suddenly change because of the music you hear at a certain time? "

Oshima nodded. "Of course," he said, "what we are aware of is similar to chemical action. After that, we checked ourselves and learned that all the scales have reached a higher level, and our realm has expanded by one round. I feel the same way. It only happens once in a while, occasionally. Like love. " I really feel the emotion and understanding of something.

Hoshino lingered in the room. By the way, maybe Canel Saunders will call. The old man must know how to deal with stones. Maybe he will give a loving and helpful suggestion. But no matter how you look at the phone, it doesn't ring, just keep silent. Silent phone calls look introspective. No one knocked at the door, no mail (even one), no special events (even one), no climate change, no premonition. Only time passes without expression. Come at noon and quietly approach the evening in the afternoon. The second hand of the electronic wall clock on the wall glides smoothly across the water of time like a lobster. Nakata continued his journey of death in bed. I don't know why I have no appetite at all. After drinking the third can of coke, Hoshino symbolically chewed a few soda cookies. (This is probably the mood when I am most lonely and bored.)

"I threw away things that I shouldn't have thrown away in the distant past." She said, "I threw away what I cherish most. I'm afraid I'll lose it sooner or later, so I have to throw it away myself. I think it's better to throw it away than to be accidentally taken away or disappeared. Of course, there is also anger that cannot be reduced. However, that is wrong. This is something I can never throw away. " The more precious things are, the more difficulties or fantasies we face. We are always afraid of losing them, so we take the initiative to lose them to compensate for our fears. This only ends our experience of having precious things ahead of schedule, and we lose value and focus.

"We are all losing all kinds of precious things," he said after the phone hung up. "Precious opportunities and possibilities, irreparable feelings. This is a meaning of survival. But in our heads-I think it should be in our heads-there is a small room that keeps these as memories. It must be a room like a library bookshelf. In order to know the correct state of our hearts, we must constantly make search cards for that room. You also need to clean, change the air and change the water for the vase. In other words, you are destined to live in your own library forever. " In fact, that room is our memory, our experience is accumulating, we are moving forward, constantly demanding answers like experience, and rewriting past experiences with new experiences.

"I hope you remember me." Saeki said, "As long as you remember me, it doesn't matter if you are forgotten by others."

"It's best to sleep first." The boy named crow said, "When you wake up, you will become a part of the new world."

Soon, you fell asleep. When you wake up, you will be part of a new world. The result of the ending is that everything is like a dream. /kloc-the special experience of 0/5 years old, it is because of the experience that you have a more certain attitude towards returning to your past life, and that is where you should stay. If it was a new life, I think you should have walked out of the desert long ago, not before you set foot on it! )