I have seen a more detailed version of this joke before, and I wonder if anyone can list it. I'd appreciate it.

1. I remember the day my son was born ... the nurse took his son out of the delivery room ... It was really exciting to be a father for the first time ... I quickly took over my son ... and I habitually said, Come on, uncle, hug me, be good ... There was silence around me at once. ...

2. A friend's child goes to primary school, and the teacher asks him to draw. The first three pictures show that the pig got lost. Mother pig looked for the pig, and later she found it. Let's draw the fourth picture. According to our idea, the children will draw a picture of mother pig and pig living happily together, but I don't know ... The children drew a bonfire with two roast pigs on it. ...

3. Listen to what our teacher said: Our school used to be called * * Textile Institute, with a small campus and poor accommodation. After a boy finished his exam, his father silently took him around the school. He was probably scared by his poor school work and decided to go back to study again. Even when children's shoes were reread, the name of our school was changed from * * Textile Institute to * * University. Children's shoes didn't ask around when they volunteered, so they directly filled in the university of * *. As a result, on the day of registration, his father took him around the school again ... Father and son cried bitterly. .....

Before preparing for military training, a man was suddenly pulled into the team by my instructor, and the whole playground was watching him at once. The instructor kicked him in the stomach: is it a man to be late without wearing training clothes? Very typical. Two hours after the dissolution, the instructor asked him: What's your name? He cried with a wow: I'm a woman, living in the next building ... just coming down for a walk. ...

Yesterday, NPC deputies walked the red carpet, and Shi Yongxin, NPC deputy and abbot of Shaolin Temple, was surrounded by reporters, throwing out all kinds of questions, but he only whispered "Amitabha". I don't know who shouted "Master, use lightness skill".

6. My junior high school is famous for its invincible group fighting. Once a student in our school was beaten by six people from other schools outside. After he came back, our school immediately dispatched more than 200 people to carpet search near the place where he was beaten. Finally, I found the six men who beat him on a road, so I chased him all the way. On the way to the pursuit, they happened to pass by the municipal committee compound, so the six men rushed in in despair. There are only two armed police guards at the door, and their guns are empty. If we want to stop them, we can only send an alarm back to the door. As a result, they turned to see that more than 200 people in our school had rushed in with red eyes. ...

The next day, a large group of policemen came to our school to check with the teachers one by one, and arrested all the students with bad records of armed fights in the past for review. Later, I learned from my father who worked in the provincial party Committee that the work inspection team sent to our city that day was listening to the work report of the municipal party Committee leaders on economy and public security in the conference room of the municipal party Committee office building, and heard the following uproar. When they opened the curtains, they saw more than 200 people armed with machetes and sticks rushing into the municipal party Committee compound. ...

7. Going back to my hometown in Qingming these days, the taxi fare in Changsha is much lower than that in Shenzhen, but ... when I went to take a taxi that day, I saw that 9 1.8 was only a few kilometers when I had to pay the fare. Why is it so expensive? Did you meet a black car? You weren't robbed, were you? You turned n thoughts in a flash.

The master saw me standing there without paying, saying that the fare 15, 9 1.8 was radio frequency. ...

8. Math teacher: "You are so stupid that your IQ is negative. My IQ is 100 times of yours! !

9. Arts and crafts counter

Sell all kinds of slingshots, crossbows and swords

One day, a group of tourists with Taiwan Province accent wanted to buy it.

The boss said: You can't sell weapons to Taiwan Province Province.

. . . . . .

10. There is a custom in my hometown. When a girlfriend goes to a man's house for the first time, his parents will give him gifts, ranging from hundreds to thousands.

My girlfriend went to my house, and my mother gave my girlfriend two thousand yuan. Girlfriend may be embarrassed and not give it at all.

I took the money and said, hold it for my girlfriend first and give it to her later.

After a few days, I couldn't help spending all my money. I told my girlfriend that I had put the money in my passbook.

A few days later, my girlfriend asked me for a gift. My girlfriend said, save it first. My girlfriend said I lied to her.

I'm sweating with anxiety. What should I do?

I had a brainwave and went to the credit union to deposit 2 yuan money. At that time, credit cooperatives still wrote passbooks by hand, unlike today's machines.

I went home with excitement and wrote 2000 yuan in the "deposit" column of my passbook.

Looking back now, my wife is really talented.

The next day, I gave my girlfriend my passbook and said I didn't lie to you. My girlfriend happily took it away and hid it at the bottom of their box.

I forget it after a long time.

On an unforgettable day, my girlfriend found me, threw herself into my arms and cried with a wronged face.

I asked affectionately, what's the matter, baby,

Who bullied you? I want to teach him a lesson.

My girlfriend sobbed and said: Credit cooperatives bully people, I went to withdraw money today, and they said-ho ho!

I quickly asked: What did they say?

Girlfriend said: what they say doesn't count. What's even more exasperating is that an old lady in line behind me told me that robbing a bank requires children to have guns.