She

1In September, 995, she was lying at home in Los Angeles and had reached the end of her life. In her later years, she was extremely thin. Even when she was young, it was difficult for her beloved cheongsam to wear the charm of her youth. They hung neatly in the closet in her mind, covered by dust. However, she remembered another thing that she had forgotten all her life, but also remembered all her life. Before leaving, she seemed to see the wedding note as thick as carving in the lantern. She still remembers that the first two sentences were written by herself and the last two sentences were written by him.

It was 1944. Her good friend Yan Ying is proof. She and Hu Lancheng got married, and they can finally be together.

However, three years later, she never saw him again, and even had almost no correspondence. But in "little reunion", she stubbornly wants to write her own good feelings after the disillusionment of love, and let the world know that he is not such a bad person.

Miss but give up, understand and be compassionate. She wrote love as heather facing the wind in the wilderness and grew up without regrets during this period of life. This is Zhang Ailing, who sang it from a clever angle in Heather's prose.

- 1 -

Heather's Essay is a song included in the album No.2 by Auntie, an antique singer. The lyrics are delicate and affectionate, but unconventional. The tune is deafening, quietly taking you through the life and present of Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng, and taking you to witness the love of the whole city with another understanding. When I first heard this song, there was a video of the same name on the Internet. At that time, Ming Tai and Yu Manli were edited in the video. I listened, tears flowed down unconsciously, silent tears streaming down my face, which shows that this song is so affectionate.

Although the lyrics tell her unforgettable love from the perspective of Zhang Ailing, they are not rigid and deliberate. A lyric is an unforgettable memory and an understanding of love. Then, the lyrics are about the unknown twists and turns in her heart after Hu Lancheng betrayed her. To use a well-known heroine's heart in A Letter from an Unknown Woman is "I love you, but it has nothing to do with you".

She persisted, tried stubbornly, and then decided to break the love. However, she just kept her love in her heart and carefully wrote down the feelings and memories he and she shared when they started writing, as if his best side was still with him.

She perfected her love with imagination and kept it for a long time. And she gave up the real him in love because she couldn't bear the pain of sharing with others. That kind of sharing not only divided her heart and time, but also cut her dignity and let the wind blow away. She would rather be alone, like a lonely heather on the wasteland.

The heather mentioned by Zhang Ailing in Talking about Music is in full bloom in the Yorkshire moor in Wuthering Heights. Flower language is lonely, betrayed love, just like Heather's love, just like Heather's own, desperate but always dignified. Flowers from all over the mountains once buried the hero of Wuthering Heights, but Zhang Ailing was reborn here.

I listen to the song and tell you in detail that there is a story here, two paragraphs of separation, three books and a few words of emotion.

- 2 -

A story. Their meeting.

Among thousands of people, in the boundless wilderness of thousands of years, it is neither too early nor too late. He met her and changed things at a glance.

It was in the early spring of 1944. It should be in Room 65, 6th Floor, Apartment Hede Road 192, Jing 'an Temple Road. In fact, their first meeting was in the beautiful garden of Daxi Road where Hu Lancheng lived.

After watching Blockade, Hu Lancheng sat up straight and thought she must meet her. Let Su Qing tell her Zhang Ailing's residential address, and then call home the next day as an enthusiastic reader.

When we first met, we submitted a notice to the audience, which was rejected. The second time, Zhang Ailing took the initiative to visit.

Obviously a stranger, he seems to be a bosom friend who talks about everything. When we first met, we talked for five hours. At that time, she should be a famous writer in his eyes, but she looked like a neurotic little girl and an immature female student. In this way, the distance between them has narrowed.

They went from friends to lovers in a very short time. Maybe love came, and the running-in time could have been ignored. Like an ordinary girl, she gave Hu Lancheng a photo of herself published in Heaven and Earth and wrote an inscription on the back:

They went from lovers to husband and wife, but this road is difficult in reason. Because when Hu Lancheng and Zhang Ailing fell in love, he was still married, until August of the same year, Hu Lancheng's wife filed for divorce. That's why there is a wedding letter, and only that wedding letter. They became a real husband and wife, but they didn't go through legal procedures.

In this way, Zhang Ailing seems to be really infatuated with Hu Lancheng, regardless of her legal status. At that time, Hu Lancheng's rhetoric was that she was worried that her identity would drag Zhang Ailing down, and only gave her a piece of wedding paper.

However, when he went to Wuhan, he met another woman, Zhou Xunde, and married her. At that time, Zhang Ailing, who finally got the news from Hu Lancheng, was heartbroken. In a whole-hearted love, nothing is more cruel than the loved one telling himself that he has changed his mind.

However, Zhang Ailing had not given up on Hu Lancheng at that time.

She even tried to live in peace with the woman Hu Lancheng later fell in love with, and offered to paint her. I have to say here that the woman here is the third woman Hu Lancheng fell in love with besides Zhang Ailing, Fan Xiumei. They were in Wenzhou at that time.

She endured and endured until there was no turning point. Zhang Ailing finally decided to leave Wenzhou, out of sight and out of mind. It was raining when she left. She sighed in the rain and said to Hu Lancheng who came to see me off, "You won't. I thought that if I had to leave you, I wouldn't commit suicide, and I wouldn't love anyone else. I would just fade away. "

After she left, the relationship was like drawing a full stop.

- 3 -

Two separations, from Shanghai to America.

After bidding farewell to Wenzhou, Zhang Ailing returned to Shanghai. Later, Hu Lancheng went back to Shanghai to find her, and stayed at her residence for one night, only to avoid the danger. In these eight or nine months, Zhang Ailing has been supporting him with her own manuscript fee, and even if she is separated, she wishes him well. He came to Shanghai, stayed there for only one night and left the next morning.

That was the last time they met.

When we meet again, it is a pen and paper meeting, and the words are like a face. Zhang Ailing once wrote two letters to Hu Lancheng.

The first letter is a farewell letter. Zhang Ailing chose to break up after everything settled down in Hu Lancheng, because she had been worried about each other's safety and didn't want to cause any more trouble when Hu Lancheng was displaced. In the form of a farewell letter, she also filled in the last stroke for her unfinished period.

In the farewell letter, Zhang Ailing's 300,000 manuscript fee was attached. In this way, Hu Lancheng will gain more vitality in stability. Is this letting go or not letting go?

The second letter is a letter. In a letter to Hu Lancheng, Zhang Ailing wrote that it was difficult to find the books she needed because of the lack of book resources at hand. I hope Hu Lancheng can send books for reference. As for the rest, don't think about it. She doesn't even want to reply to this letter. Maybe she didn't want to have anything to do with him if she didn't have to. This is put down again, but I still can't put it down.

- 4 -

Three books. Little reunion, the love of the whole city, this life.

The first book mentioned in the lyrics is little reunion, which is also the last book published in Zhang Ailing's works. It was not published before her death. The manuscript was completed on 1976, when she was abroad and left Hu Lancheng.

The heroine Jiu Li and the hero Shao Zhiyong in this book are comparable to the shadows of Zhang Ailing and Hu Lancheng. Zhang Ailing once wrote in her creative experience: "This is a passionate story, and what I want to express is the endless twists and turns of love. After complete disillusionment, there is still something left. "

This is a writer's advantage, but fate is also a bit cruel to writers. The person she persistently misses has been written into words by her bit by bit, which has become an indelible image in the world, and it is the same person she has made up her mind to forget. She can't forget it when she walks around, so she can only obey her inner command and write it down.

Although people can't get together, the book is called little reunion. This is a reflection left by Zhang Ailing after she left her dignity.

The second book mentioned in the lyrics is Love in a Fallen City. This is not Zhang Ailing's famous work, but it is my favorite one. This book was written in 1943, before she knew Hu Lancheng, but Fan Liuyuan is very much like Hu Lancheng. However, she is more frank and frank, and treats her feelings more calmly, which is nothing like Bai Liusu.

Two inseparable men and women haggle over their own gains and losses, racking their brains to calculate each other, but they are also forced by each other to take a step back, take a step further, take a step back, make a living in the struggle of love, and also have love.

At the end of the story, Bai Liusu and Fan Liuyuan were trapped in the war-torn Hongkong, trapped in this world, but they helped them.

Legend is everywhere. She wrote her own legend, but she couldn't write the legend of herself and Hu Lancheng. The legend in that story is that her tolerance and compassion were given to Bai Liusu and Fan Liuyuan, and the sad men and women were completely isolated from the outside world, but she could not finish it with Hu Lancheng herself.

At one time, I thought that if she and Hu Lancheng met Jong and Miss, they might live forever, just like the ruins bombed by guns, thinking of the eternal Fan Liuyuan.

This Life is Hu Lancheng's most famous book. This book is an autobiography in prose style, the title of which is taken by Zhang Ailing, and the content is also related to their love, so Zhang Ailing will write to Hu Lancheng for reference after going abroad.

It's a pity that although Hu Lancheng is a gifted scholar, he is not a loyal minister who distinguishes between black and white in troubled times, nor is he the love of his life.

Zhang Ailing once wanted to spend her life together, but she could only stay in a shallow name. With the reprint of the book and the spread of the affair, it gradually dissipated with the wind.

-Conclusion.

Zhang Ailing, who personally sent a farewell letter, Zhang Ailing, who was too stubborn to meet each other, and Zhang Ailing, who still wrote Hu Lancheng in the book after separation, are all her own. Zhang Ailing who is honest with herself, Zhang Ailing who knows her inner love view, and Zhang Ailing who only wants peace even if she is separated. This is all her own. Like heather who is stubborn and crying on the wasteland, she stands firm in the wind and writes affectionately, so that the fragrance will last forever and the story will continue.

In her works, perishable love finally has the appearance of Heather.

(Tuanzi said: I want to cry when listening to music. )