A scholar's fortune teller grows grass on the wall _ A scholar's high school grows grass on the wall.

There are riddles, jokes and allegorical sayings about homophonic Chinese characters.

Fire in Kannonji-Miao (Temple Disaster)

Monkey Sun sits in the golden hall-unlike a kind king.

Birthday Shooting-Same tune (gun)

The birthday girl plays the pipa-a cliche (playing)

Wheat straw fire-blowing economizer

Horse racing in the alley-the problem (hoof) is hard to come by

Cross the river by pulling the beard-modesty (pulling the beard) is excessive (crossing the river)

Ring the bell and pull it into the air-fantasy (ring)

Catch bees and eat honey-Tian (sweet) is shameless (stinging)

Buy camels at Huguo Temple-There is no such thing (city)

Zanthoxylum bungeanum is caught in the rice crisis (rice)

The fly flies into the cow's eyes-tired of looking for it (tears)

Bean dregs stick to the door-not sticky (sticky)

Beans and firewood are on fire-hurry (dustpan)

Dried Tofu cook the meat-How many portions (vegetarian)

Cooking with tofu-no words (salt)

This couple hoes the ground-regardless of (hiring) people.

200 yuan peanuts-you have to refute (peel)

Peach in both hands-reasonable (gift)

Blow the two speakers into a tune-they want to ring together.

The charm of drought worships witches-damn it

Bamboo shoots outside the garden-nephew (raw)

Men don't beat their wives-it's a blessing (husband and wife)

A scholar writes poetry-he has two hands (the first one).

Bald man takes off his hat-the first name (Ming)

It's just right for a girl from He's family to give it to Zheng Jiazheng (Zheng Heshi)

Abdominal rowing-expert (navigation)

Measuring Rice with a Turtle Cover —— What Sound (L)

There's smoke in the rice cooker-the rice is burnt.

Light mosquito-repellent incense under the bed-there is no bottom (mosquito)

Frozen Tofu-Difficult (Mixed)

Stir-fry hot beans in a cold pot-the noisier (stir-fry), the colder.

Kitchen God sticks to the door-there is something in words (pictures)

Sand versus bluestone-solid (stone) versus solid (stone)

Sailing on the beach is shallow.

Cows without horns-fake scolding (horses)

I missed the temple fair-don't worry (crowded)

A coffin without a bottom-not a person.

No money to buy conch-save (suck)

A pregnant woman crosses a wooden bridge-taking risks at the same time.

Holding a horse spoon-sincere (sheng) heart

Holding cotton in your arms-a soft (warm) heart

Put the comb in your arms-relax your heart.

The poor buy rice, per liter.

A poor carpenter started his business-only one sentence (saw)

The tinker planted a somersault-handstand (iron)

Zhang Tianshi went to the seaside, feeling very strange.

Zhang Tianshi knelt in the mud and begged (sunshine).

The donkey is riding-no wonder (riding a horse)

Cock wears a hat-official (crown) plus official (crown)

Knock dust on the chicken's head-how many (chickens) suffer from anger?

Chickens peck at ants-just right (food)

Just accept the sole without an awl.

A paper railing-you can't lean on it.

Paper stool-you can't do it (sit)

A papery stove-it won't work if you cross (the pot).

Paper pipa-talking (playing) is not allowed.

Donkey skin stuck to the wall-what a shame (painting)

Kidnappers go to the hospital-consciously (treating feet)

Frog jumps on the drum-understand (knock)

Walking down the coal mine with crutches-bad luck is coming step by step (coal)

Cross the road with a beard-modesty (with a beard)

The horse in the painting-not surprising (riding)

Jujube core cutting board-a few words (saw)

Sell cloth without a ruler-it's intentional.

Selling shrimp without scale-catching blind people (shrimp)

Bonfire bug's ass-not much (bright)

Monks open umbrellas-lawlessness is impossible.

Separated monks-troubled (temple)

Monks sitting in caves-nothing (temples)

Monk dragging wood-something happened (temple)

Monk's home-temple

Monk's skull-can't (send)

Chopping bamboo with an axe-in a hurry (section 1)

Cast a net in a fish pond-excess (fish)

Foxes quarrel-a set of Hu (fox) characters

The fox rides a tiger-the fox is a fake (driving) from the tiger.

Dogs have horns-foreign (sheep) gas

Dogs eat tofu brain-leisure (bit)

Dogs eat grass-pretend (sheep)

Dogs eat cucumbers when they are wrong.

Blind people make fried dough sticks-blind people (fried paste)

Blind people wear glasses-smart (Chongming)

Cattle herders eat crabs-needless to say (with salt)

Sauté ed pickles with salt-too idle (salty)

Install a pot on the kang-transform (the stove)

Washing Huang Lian by the River —— Why is it bitter?

Vegetables grow in rivers-they are not burnt (watered).

Oil pouring candle-a heart (core)

The plasterer fooled the mouse-perfunctory (eyes)

Masons have no ash-wait for bricks.

The plasterer beckons-looking for you (mud)

Masons' tiles are painted with knives.

The clay idol has grass on her body. She is crazy.

Muddy loach playing drums-talking nonsense (playing)

Fear of carpenters-just a word (saw)

Hanging lanterns in the air-mystery (hanging)

An empty shuttle for mending the net-there is no rule of law (weaving)

Empty coffins go to the funeral-there is no one in the eye (wood)

Empty steamer on the table-contending for (steaming)

Put a dry cage on your shoulder-get angry with the fire.

Needle on the thread board-hold it (don't)

Orchard in spring-makes sense (peaches and plums)

Watching the field in the Spring and Autumn Period-Specializing in finding fault (fork)

Glass Bodhisattva-Understanding Man (God)

Selling steamed bread-Yu (steamed)

Zhao Kuangyin has a nosebleed-the red one is (me).

Who gouged out his eyes-the blind judge (ghost)

Chenghuangmiao Drum-Ghost Watch (Knock)

Huang Cheng's master's horse-no wonder (riding)

Lord Huang Cheng's Hu Dou-Ghost Noisy (Fried)

Dai Xiao, Lord of the Town God-Running in vain (robe)

Licorice in the drugstore-an indispensable kind (taste)

Open the drawer of the drugstore-look for (pills)

There is a fire in the teahouse-indeed as expected (burning)

Bo is in the teahouse-Hu (pot)

Straw as a lamp-carelessness (core)

Rumbling in the grass mud pond-laughing (fermenting)

A straw hat is a gong-I can't think of it (loud)

Grass Beach Fire-Kindness (Green)

Buckwheat shells are mashed-they are not sticky (sticky)

Vitex negundo L.

Sitting in the lobby and using the toilet-stealing (dirty) officials

Little trees have little shade-they can't take care of them.

The tree has fallen-there is no shadow (shadow)

Bacon soup-needless to say (salt)

Eat too much salt and salt-just relax (salty)

Kimchi and Tofu-the word (salt) comes first

Boil tofu with pickles-needless to say (salt)

Pickles dipped in soy sauce are too strict (salty)

A crooked monk confessed that something was wrong (neck) with Niu Jiao sheep.

The sheep asked, "Who are you?"

The cow said, "I am a cow."

The sheep asked, Shit, who are you?

Bull: Shit, I am a cow.

A saw that B was struggling to move the box, so he said, Let me help you move it.

B can't use the roller on the box, so he says to A, Go away!

A is very angry, B says quickly, I let you use the wheel.

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Wo Chun (I am stupid)

Lying in the plum blossom and smelling the flowers, (I have no culture),

Lying on a stone and depicting the sky.

The fish kisses Shi Shui, (asking who I am),

Lie on the stone and answer Chun Lv. I am a big donkey.

(a) engaged in health undertakings.

My husband works in other places, and met him online at noon.

Husband: Wife, what did you do this morning?

Wife: Honey, I cleaned at home this morning.

Husband: Oh! What a good wife! That-testicles?

Wife: Ah ...?

(2) Appear

My husband doesn't surf the Internet often. When I was in junior high school, I met a female classmate on the Internet. He happily sent a message: "Are you there?"

The female classmate happened to have something to leave and didn't reply for a long time.

My husband was a little impatient and typed a line and sent it: "What took you so long? Dedicate yourself quickly! "

That female classmate is simple. Suddenly seeing her husband's information, she ran over and replied: "Come on! Wait! "

(3) Find an Internet cafe

My friend is away on business. When he left, he said to meet online at 3 pm.

I waited left and right and finally arrived.

Before I could speak, I saw a message from there: "Turtles are really hard to recruit!" "

I didn't react for a moment: "What?"

Friends laughed; "Internet cafes are hard to find!"

1, at the beginning of the new semester, my dormitory brothers and I went to the department to pay tuition. A notice was posted at the door of the department office: this year, a unified fee will be imposed, and sexual intercourse will cost 4,600 yuan, and no accommodation fee will be charged.

The third child worked as a cashier in a shop during the summer vacation. We all said that he made a sum of money easily, and Lao Liu retorted, "Easy? You try! I was dizzy after working at the cashier all day, and my hands were sore. "

The fifth student in the Student Union is responsible for the reception of new students. Today, he came back and said, "There is a beautiful junior in the class next door to our department. Her surname is mute. "

After the freshman party in the department, I asked my fifth and third children to send the stereo back to the student union. Put it in their hands, fearing that they would not hold it stably, they asked, "Are you holding it firmly?" . "Hold on! Hold on! " The two men answered in unison.

The dormitory owner has a new girlfriend, who gave him a new walkman. The boss looked at the instructions, fiddled with them and said to himself, "Everything is fine, but there is only one channel!" " ".Old three watched martial arts in the upper bunk and asked," Isn't one enough? "The boss said," I want one more channel to connect to the computer. " "wow! You are really sick! " The third child said.

6. Old four's girlfriend is also in our class. Both the experimental class and the curriculum design will be in the same group. Of course, every time the old four has to share more tasks. One night, we were playing chess in Guo Jun, and because we were short of manpower, we dragged our fourth son who was doing an "internship report" and was half a night late. When I was resting the next morning, I heard my old four's girlfriend shouting at him with an "internship report": "You didn't finish it! You're not done until you're done! But why did you lie to me! " . Afterwards, we invited Old Four to have a meal, and it was the two brothers who made him lift his head.