Do you think I'm still the one who has to think about it for fifty dollars for a long time? I want something five dollars deep.

1. The world is sick, not to mention I have to raise it.

2. Don't go out when the roads in single dog are frozen in winter, because if you fall, it will freeze into ... Wang Wang will break the ice.

Lazy personality, interest is playing, specialty is eating, and skill is sleeping.

4. Is the daughter-in-law important or the game important? Daughter-in-law is of course important, so I only dare to play games and dare not hit my daughter-in-law.

When I got up in the morning, I saw someone shouting in the mirror, "Wow, this beautiful girl looks like a flower."

6. I am so stupid. You said you would love me forever, but I forgot to ask, is it this life or the next life?

7. What is a friend? Put 500 yuan on the table and you won't lose it. If you put a bag of melon seeds back, there will be a pile of skin left.

8. This is a magical era. Pupils call themselves gods and demons, junior high school students call themselves my palace and me, senior high school students call themselves grandfathers, and college students call themselves babies.

9. After cutting my hair, the barber asked me how I felt. I was silent for a while and said, I am happy if you are happy.

10. Please don't giggle at me when I call your full name, because I'm serious at this moment.

1 1. The old vine is a faint crow, the school food is too bad, and the classmates are hungry. The sun is setting. Well, I'm going home.

12. Grandpa said that in their time, when they met questions that they couldn't do in the exam, they wrote "Long live Chairman Mao", and no one dared to cross it.

13. Every woman is looking for a man, but in the end, she finds that the most man is herself.

14. In the afterlife, I want to be a dandelion, without attachments, without desires, calm and safe.

15. I was from Shenyang before drinking, and Shenyang is mine after drinking.

16. Every time I finish my homework, I sit at my desk and sort out the materials, as if I had just finished broadcasting the news broadcast.

17. The girl I love has a round chest. If I touch her big ass, she will still call me a hooligan.

18. The boy at that station was very handsome, so I went forward and grabbed his potato chips and ran away.

19. Born in light, born in food, born in fat, born in bangs, born in gale, born in me, why not have my partner?

20. If you are good, I can consider not patting your ass or touching your chest!

Young man, you don't even have five dollars, do you?

An idiot married a wife. On their wedding night, he asked, Who am I? Hearing this, the woman looked at the wall and said nothing. Men know it's impolite and apologize. The woman said, don't interrupt, I was counting, and the man suddenly fainted!

Just started school, a girl transferred from the middle school next door is quite beautiful. The teacher asked her to introduce herself on the platform. The girl went to the podium and said, Hello, my name is Jiao Yuan, and I am 17 years old this year. Thank you. On hearing the name, I smiled. The teacher glared at me: What are you laughing at, Mai Biyan? I .......

My daughter is three years old, and my wife came home from work at noon last night to have lunch together! Wife: Honey, did you watch TV last night? My daughter looked at me and asked, Dad, did I watch TV last night? Me (hesitating for three seconds): No! Daughter: No! Mom ~ wife: hmm ~ hum, you two are so treacherous ~

I remember a few years ago, I met an old fortune teller on the road. At that time, he stopped me and insisted on giving me a divination. I asked him, "What can I do for you?" The old man confidently replied, "Well, five dollars is nothing." Me: "Do you think I have money in my pocket now?" The old man stared at me for a long time and asked me strangely, "Young man, you don't even have five dollars, do you?" Crazy, really not. . . . .

Once again, the reporter went to interview penguins and asked what you are doing every day now. Penguin: Eat, sleep and play with peas! Ask the second, the third ... the answer is the same. The last one arrived, and the reporter said, Are you Doudou? Penguin slapped the reporter. Crying, I fell asleep. . . Go to sleep. . . .

When I was a child, I dug in the yard and dug up an antique jar with a good seal. I thought it was a treasure left by my ancestors, but when I opened it, it was modern money. . . I gave the money to my mother, but my father beat me up. . .

I heard from a friend that when he was in college, a boy with low emotional intelligence finally met a girl he liked, and they just started dating. Once a girl was ill, and a boy accompanied her to the infirmary for intravenous drip. Ten minutes passed, twenty minutes passed, and nothing happened. Thinking of breaking the silence, the boy asked, "Is it cold?" Girl: "cold". Boy: "I'll cover it for you when it's cold?" The girl blushed and whispered "Yes". Then the boy stood up and put his hand on the drip bottle.

When I went to the drugstore to buy gunpowder, I saw a sister weighing herself on the scale at the door. While she was not looking, her boyfriend came up behind her. Sister looked at the results, obviously paused, turned and hugged her boyfriend, and actually began to cry ... crying. ...

In high school, my deskmate and I made a bet on helping each other cook. On the first day he lost, he helped me cook and gave me at least half a catty of rice! Then say don't waste food! I am a girl. I'm hurt. I lost the next day, he said with a smile, keep playing. I'm not afraid! I can eat as much as I want! So I waited in the last row before the delivery truck left and only gave him a bite of rice.

A monk came to the canteen and bought a bottle of shampoo and two cans of beer. Curious, a friend asked the monk: wine and meat pass through the intestines, but the Buddha stays in his heart. Master, you don't need this shampoo, do you? Monk: Oh, this is for my wife. Friends think that a master is a master!

Dad called and said something had happened to my sister. I hurried home to see my sister sitting on the sofa crying, and my mother's eyes were red. I quickly asked my dad what happened, and my dad said, "Your sister deleted your mother's happiness, and your mother hit level 500!" "

Boys get married and say it's cheap to get married now. I'll let you spend 9 yuan to fix it.

1, Nuoxiao: Not married. Talking about loving you is just my outdated toy.

2. You may get married after your first love. After all, no one really loves me.

3. I am paranoid. After we get married, I can always see you smiling at me.

My sister got married today and didn't get the blessing from her parents, but I hope my sister is happy.

I hope those couples in school will continue to talk about marriage.

On the 34th day together, penniless, I accompanied him to work in Zhanjiang. I don't expect him to get married, but I just want to spend the most difficult time with him now.

My sister will get married tomorrow. I wish her happiness.

8. The baby and Xiaoming are getting married. Love Ryan and Li Feier.

9. There is a kind of happiness that makes us get married.

10, he is 22 now, and he will get married in two years. What about you? I still have school, dreams, youth and parents, right?

1 1. The baby is married. Only the giant panda opened and didn't send Weibo to bless her.

12. If you get married before me in the end, you must tell me, and I will secretly hack you and bless you.

13, "May I marry you when I was seventeen years old."

14, even if you get married tomorrow, I won't be reconciled.

15, baby Huang Xiaoming is married! What about Ryan?

16. Today, he sent me a recording of "Let's Get Married" he sang. I cried. We've been dating for over a year. I believe we will wait until that day.

I want to be his marriage partner.

18, stay together, and we will get married when we are old.

19, I was thinking, it's good to see you again when you are tired of playing or want to get married.

Will you please give me an invitation when you get married? I want to see how that Wen Ya girl realized my dream of marrying you.

2 1, he said: If you can come to my side now, then we will go back to get married at the end of the year, but he knows I can't.

I told my predecessor that I don't want to see him again in my next life, but I don't think so in my heart. I still love him, but he is married.

23.baby and Huang Xiaoming are married. What about Ryan?

I always say that I won't get married in the future just because I'm afraid I can't.

I hope I can wait until your wedding day.

26. We are online dating. married

27. It's cheap to get married now. I want you to spend 9 yuan money on it.

28. I hope that the person I want to marry in a few years is you I fell in love with when I was a teenager.

29. "I am married, will you come to my wedding?" "Of course I will go. How can the groom get married without going? "

30. The man whom Ryan protected for so long got married after all.

A copy of a circle of friends, which contains a 52 yuan red envelope for my brother.

1. The husband who gives his wife a red envelope can be said to be the cutest husband.

Forget it, don't talk nonsense, the Spring Festival is coming. Burning a bunch of fireworks brings you good luck; Open the red envelope and give you happy wishes; Say long live to you, a happy family; Send a short message, true friendship to you.

3. There is a friend who has done nothing but grab red envelopes since the New Year's Eve dinner. The results are as follows.

When I received my boyfriend's red envelope, I felt very happy ... I love you.

5. The gift was received, and the little fox sprouted on me! When my nails are longer, I can print foxes.

I can't thank you enough for the red envelope you gave me. Thank you, friend.

7. There are no gifts this Valentine's Day, only 13 14 yuan's red envelope.

Although I was really dizzy by the barber today, I still felt great when I received the gift.

9. Just after the Spring Festival, the Lantern Festival has arrived again; I still miss the joy of receiving red envelopes during the Spring Festival, and I still remember the happiness of reuniting with my loved ones. I texted you to make you dizzy! Wish happiness and sweetness! The future is bright!

10. I may not be your best employee, but you are my most respected leader. Happy holidays!

1 1. Although the amount of your red envelope is not large, it at least proves your intention.

12. I woke up in the morning and received red envelopes from my husband and daughter. In the kitchen, my husband has packed jiaozi and jiaozi. They are delicious, but the dumpling skin is a little thick, as thick as steamed bread skin. I call it "Nostoc jiaozi"!

13. Dear spot sauce! Gifts and red envelopes have been received! I'm so happy! Thank you.

14. No matter what happens in the future, I want to thank you for coming into my life and bringing me beauty and happiness!

15. When I received my daughter's red envelope, I felt very happy ... I love you, so ...

16. Long time no contact. I know my situation is so difficult that I want to buy all kinds of things and give me red envelopes.

17. Imagine that if it weren't for this, I wouldn't understand many things. Thank you for your help.

18 .. It hurts to be delayed after receiving the gift, but it is very worthy of recognition that Fat Orange has a heart that is willing to spend two for me.

19. All over the body, credit card, bank card, Alipay, WeChat red envelope, balance 0. Starved to death in the northwest wind.

20. A journey of a thousand miles will accumulate steps; The ship of Wan Li is a compass; Thanks to the guidance of the leaders on weekdays, we have today. I wish you a happy New Year!