Blind fortune-telling joke

Who uses ancient poems, two-part allegorical sayings, couplets or jokes with homophonic Chinese characters?

Harmony Association:

Two apes cut down trees in the deep mountain, and the little monkey dared to look (sentence)

How does the old beast solve the problem (hoof)-solve the problem?

Lotus root and lotus root, (why do I get a couple)

Apricots don't need plums (fortunately, they don't need media)

A dog gnaws at a river (monk) bone-Su Shi

Poems on Dongpo of Flowing Water (corpse)-Fo Yin

Su Shi-the first spring of Xiangyang family.

Go beyond it (Fish) Celebrate the Good Man-Fo Yin.

He Danshang (monk) on Shiguta

Embroidered in front of the beauty hall (scholar)

Confucius was born on the weekend of the week.

Light dance (martial arts) began in Hanzhong (light dance: lightning; Hanzhong: the sky)

Lantern cage lights, paper (orange) shells used to be just windproof.

Drum drum, tangerine peel can't knock half (summer)

Wentingyun

Light a candle at the bottom of the well and you can play Go together. (candle indication, expired)

Linglong dice Anhoudou, what do you know about bone acacia?

Bamboo branch Liu Yuxi

The willows in Jiang Shuiping are green, and I can hear the songs on the Langjiang River.

Rain in the east, sunrise in the east, said it was not sunny, but it was still sunny. (Sunshine-Affection)

Lotus (pity) son is bitter in heart,

Pear-shaped (separated) intra-abdominal acid in children

A blind man walked into a cigarette shop. (touching the lamp).

Wrapped in the air-playing the fool. (install wind).

Sung river's strategist-useless. (Wu Yong).

The old woman went to the henhouse-idiot. (running eggs).

The straw hat seller throws the pole-be careful. (leaving the rope).

Brother is not at home.-Come on. (sister-in-law).

My nephew plays with lanterns as usual. (According to uncle).

The rain hits Huangmei's head-bad luck. (pour plums).

Half a grain of cotton-no way. (bullet-free)

Bald man with an umbrella-lawlessness. (no hair can't).

A short transition-inner peace. (Pan Xin).

Horse shops buy pigs-that's not true. There is no such city.

December weather-hands and feet. Frozen hands and feet.

A father kowtows to his son-hang it all. There is no such gift.

Public toilets are still being stoned-causing public outrage. (causing male feces).

Under a fur coat.-pretend. Pretending to be a sheep.

Confucius' action is a complete loss. All the books.

Pregnant women walk on a wooden bridge-despair. (The risk is quite high).

Grandma's dead son-hopeless. (No uncle).

The husband slapped a face. (wife is cold).

Scholar towel. (Bao Shu).

The tortoise climbed the threshold-but look at this. But look at this page.

It's not surprising that the needle is still picking out towels. (Not enough for a flag).

Slam the bamboo with a blunt knife.-hard. (it won't ring).

How dare you tie a chicken feather to a telephone pole? What a big duster.

Knock melon seeds, knock bedbugs-everyone has them. There are all kinds of benevolence.

Light grass and drums-I don't want to. (Silence).

Crutches at intersections-you can't be the master. I can't do it.

Chatting at the salt store-I have nothing to do. It's too salty to cook.

Zhang Tianshi doesn't need a boat to cross the sea-it has its own laws. (have their own methods).

Blow the horn from the window-it's famous. (singing outside).

The dragon god moved.-great. (out of the sea)

Laojiu's brother.-Really? (old ten).

Buried in an empty coffin-arrogant. There is no one in the Woods.

Eight-pronged approach-rules. (turtle lifts).

Wear gloves in June-conservative. (hand protection).

Raw peanuts.-it must be noisy. I'm going to explode.

The shoemaker doesn't have an awl-that's good. (needle and thread)

It is just right for any girl to marry Zheng Jia. (Zheng Heshi).

Monk's house-temple. (wonderful).

Wash Huang Lian by the river-why bother? The river is bitter.

Blind people wear glasses-false intelligence. (pretending to be clear).

Dreams become butterflies-daydreams. (Want to fly).

Monkeys learn to walk-pretend. (fake orangutan).

Hardcover maotai-very old. (Good wine)

Spider trawling-selfish. (from silk).

The blind lead the blind-busy is busy. (blind and blind).

Long live Grandpa with a nosebleed-Zhen Hong. I am red.

What's next-ask the question to the end. (tattoo to the end).

Walking in the watermelon field. (the circle where the left and right sides intersect).

Take off your old shoes and put on new ones-turn over a new leaf. (changing shoes).

Sacks and straw bags-each generation is not as good as the next. One bag is not as good as one.

I can remember the beans at the bottom of the bowl. (the grain enters the eye).

Selling cloth without feet-bad intentions. (deliberate accident).

A poor carpenter starts a business-only one sentence. There is only a saw.

Brick kiln fire-rumor. (kiln smoke).

Without oil, it is a waste of heart. (Waste of energy).

Zhong Kui married his sister-fooling around. (ghost marriage)

The dung boat crossed the river-playing dead. (loading shit).

Sticking to the Nest and Mixing with Huang Lian —— Year after year of suffering. (sticky)

Open a drawer in a drugstore-have fun. (looking for pills)

Frogs dive well-I don't understand. (poop-poop).

Riding in Opera-No (Walking)

Saute pickles without soy sauce-as promised. Salt comes first.

Eating jiaozi without stuffing-naughty. (pick the skin).

From Henan to Hunan-it's even harder. (South Canada).

Carry a stone with a lantern-do it. (copy).

The earth temple was washed away by the flood-be careful. (Liu Shen).

Whips in the fields.-Bullshit. (urging cattle).

The backbone of children-the generation of small people. The back of the villain.

Aviation somersault-handstand. (inverted flight test).

The mouse fell into the water tank-fashionable. (wet hair).

The old monk lives in a cave-there is nothing. (No temple).

The cargo ship is at sea.-amateurs. (Foreign Airlines).

Burn the flagpole-sigh. (long charcoal).

Weasel in the henhouse-speculation. (stealing chickens).

Soak the stone in the sauce jar-it's a long story. One salt is hard to get in.

There is a reason for setting off firecrackers in the well. (with a round sound).

It is not easy for an old hen to hold an empty nest. (No eggs).

Eat ginseng-spare. (added).

Pi Di's mother-too thick-skinned. (Empress Dowager Pi).

Millennium stone Buddha statue-honest man. (Old Stone Man).

Bring a sheep into the photo studio-make a fool of yourself. (Make a sheep face)

Growing vegetables on the wall-no chance. There is no garden.

Crazy chat with a fan. (rumor)

Twelve taels of silver-for sure. (one ingot).

Sleep in the toilet-it's not far from death. It's not far from shit

Tang Priest's book is serious. A true sutra

Eating a small bowl depends on the weather. (author Tim).

The meat pot was thrown into the river-groggy. (heavy meat).

The tortoise has chicken feathers in its belly-anxious to return. The turtle's heart is like an arrow.

There is a hole behind the temple-great. The temple is finished.

Birthday star Qi Xianhe-No road. No deer.

Put down eighteen dollars twice-I've heard that for a long time. (nine articles).

Girls in dyehouses don't wear white shoes-naturally. (self-dyeing).

Tie a braid in the back-breaking the law and discipline. (tail hair disorder).

The stove turned over-what bad luck. (Pour coal).

Smoke in the rice cooker-confusion. The rice is burnt.