What advice can you give to a 20-year-old?

What advice can you give to a 20-year-old?

Don't cook chicken soup. Privately, for an ordinary person, at least for most people, the gold accumulation period of a lifetime is only a few years, which is about 18 to 25 years old. This is a transitional period from immaturity to relative maturity. Later, due to various trivial matters such as getting married and having children, the speed of growth and progress gradually slowed down. If we can grasp the accumulation period, I believe there will be qualitative changes.

The following is my personal feeling. The later, the more important. I am not cultivating the richest man, so the whole article is easy to understand. No big talk, no theorem theory. If you are in this confused period, I suggest you take a few minutes to finish reading this article, and don't take it out of context. I believe it will help you.

May more people calibrate their direction and be kind to themselves.

1. Refuse to stay up late and work and rest reasonably.

The reason why I put it in the first point is that it is a common problem of many people and it is difficult to suppress it. I will never put down my mobile phone until two or three in the morning, and I can't get up the next morning, day after day.

Staying up late not only damages the skin, but also induces gastrointestinal diseases and increases the risk of cancer, just like chronic suicide.

My mother often sends me "the danger of staying up late, it's shocking after reading it!" "These ten kinds of food will cause cancer" and other articles. It is not until people reach middle age that they realize that nothing is more important than health.

If you go to various departments of the hospital, you will find those crying scenes in TV dramas. Where will you go? It's really normal in the hospital.

Take good care of your parents in advance, develop good habits of work and rest, and don't wait until you are in pain to know that you are afraid of life.

If you don't know what to do, exercise first!

If you are still confused about the future, you don't know where to go. Then put down what you are doing, order a music that is so high that you can't stop exercising, and let all your troubles go with sweat.

Because fitness is really the only thing in the world at present, and it is the fairest thing to give and get. Since nothing can be done well, why not experience the feeling of success here in the fitness center first?

No time to run? Do you have time to get up and jog for half an hour every morning? If you can do the first thing, there is still time.

No time to go to the gym? There are so many fitness apps on the mobile phone, which one can't be used. Cheap yoga mats on Taobao are 20 and dumbbells are 60, less than 100, which is enough for you to practice muscle explosion. A group of training lasted for half an hour. Don't slap the glory of the king in the toilet. Is it time?

Fitness changes not only a person's figure, but also a person's spirit. And a good mental outlook is only the first step in good interpersonal communication.

3. Cherish time and learn to manage it.

This is really something that only 30-year-olds understand. The older I get, the less time I feel, and I hope to have 24 more hours a day.

How to make better use of time, in a word: concentrate on doing big things, distract yourself from doing small things, and do small things in the middle.

The mind should be clear, when to do something, and don't put the cart before the horse.

In addition, things have priorities, which can refer to the four quadrants of time management.

4. Properly handle interpersonal relationships

Anger is one of the few failures in this world. Everything is written on the face, but the face is not big enough. All the emotions that can't be written are hidden, leaving only a smile.

Make more friends with useful people, repay those who are good to you and let go of those who hate you. Be tactful and try not to offend anyone. You never know what role he will play in your life.

Examples of thirty years in Hedong and thirty years in Hexi can be seen everywhere in life. ? Take a step back, put yourself in the other's shoes, put yourself in the other's shoes and solve the problem.

Please pay attention to your personality: because of your own personality, you always live in the expectation of others, chase others' approval, constantly lower your bottom line and meet others' reasonable or even unreasonable requirements. But you didn't get what you deserved. In this unequal interpersonal communication, your contribution is taken for granted, and even a refusal will cause dissatisfaction of others. Then, before you learn to be tactful, please learn to say no politely, keep the bottom line of principle and keep your dignity.

5. Never deceive yourself.

There is an interesting phenomenon around me. Excellent people say that people who don't do well like to flaunt themselves.

Inefficient people say that they work hard to work overtime, while learning casually says that they stay up late to study.

Some people have made up their minds to start a library, learn piano, practice calligraphy and write programs ... from morning till night, but what is the reality? More than half of the time was spent brushing Weibo Zhihu and blowing water in the toilet. Less than 20% really work hard.

A few days later, I sent a circle of friends to say how hard I worked, turned around and treated myself to a big meal and took a small vacation. It was all in vain in the end.

Everything gives birth to the sea, and you and I are both ephemera. It is understandable to know your own level, but you must realize it if you exaggerate it. Don't go round and round and finally lie to yourself.

Send a word: it is inevitable that people are born with self-pity. Only by staying awake at all times can we see the real value.

Intransitive verbs improve work standards

Students may be less exposed to the word standard. What is a standard?

There is an old story that everyone must have heard. Two young men, A and B, entered a company at the same time. Both of them are diligent and handle things neatly. But two years later, A rose step by step, while B stood still. The boss asked B to go to the market twice, and B quoted the price of potatoes once and the price of bulk purchase for the second time. The boss asked Party A to walk again in front of Party B. Party A not only learned the price of potatoes, but also collected all the prices of Chinese cabbage, cucumber and sweet potato, and learned that the price of tomatoes will increase slightly in the near future. If the boss needed to buy goods in large quantities, people would have invited him to the door of the company.

The above story may not be true, but it may be exaggerated. Let me tell you another little thing. My great-uncle used to be the secretary-general of the city. When I was a child, a senior leader came to the city and needed him to do it himself. I saw him correcting typos and punctuation marks in the document over and over again. After tearing off a piece of paper, the handwritten telephone number should be cut neatly with a paper cutter before being handed over to the leader.

Now I tell you, what is the standard?

The standard is to do things reliably. The leader tells you one thing, and it depends on the individual. After the task is completed, the leader is satisfied, even if he meets the work standard, it would be better if there are surprises beyond the psychological threshold of the leader.

Most people are the second in the story. They are not flexible or afraid to take on more work. If you work for 3000 yuan with a salary of 3000 yuan, then your life is 3000 yuan. The boss's evaluation of you is nothing more than four words: hard work; However, if you do 10,000 jobs with a salary of 3,000 yuan, 10,000 jobs are vacant and need talents to fill them. Who won't let you go? Jean B.

Seven. Have confidence, I will kill all the flowers after they bloom.

This proposal may be controversial, depending on personal circumstances.

After I bloom, a hundred flowers blossom. This poem has always been one of my life maxims.

Seeing this, I tell you that I used to be a blushing and unsociable person. Can you believe it? When I first attended the speech, I was red-faced, stammered and read the manuscript mechanically. After I stepped down, my mind was straight and I didn't know what I was talking about. Later, yes, my great-uncle was on camera again. When he learned about this, he took my hand and said, Son, just say whatever you want in the future. Remember that no one in this world can treat you like anything!

Be a low-key person and do high-profile things. Although you started your performance, setbacks and embarrassment must be experienced in the process. Don't care what other people think. No one in this world will treat you like anything.

Eight. Think, take a long-term view and look at everything dialectically.

I said that interpersonal relationships are smooth, and some people say that work will inevitably offend people.

I said to be low-key and do high-profile things. No one in this world will treat you like anything. Some people say that it is not good to be arrogant.

I said to be wary of fragmented reading. Some people say that fragmented reading can also gain knowledge.

Most young people are facing the same problem, brainwashed by online public opinion media, lacking mature and independent three views and comprehensive understanding of things. Eyes are white except black, but more gray is ignored.

Everything should be divided into right and wrong, especially in life, when people criticize others for deliberately targeting themselves.

The world is not binary, nor is it black and white. The cause of a thing is caused by many factors and needs to be treated dialectically.

Nine. Master a skill and learn to manage money.

These two points were written together.

First of all, people need to have a skill as the foundation. So how long does this skill need to grow?

The benefits can meet the needs of life.

For example, computers, but unfortunately the CET-4 certificate is tasteless and discarded. For people engaged in the computer industry, the CET-4 certificate is not enough. If you want to make money from this, it will be a great experience in the world.

It takes at least five years to learn a skill. Don't think you can accomplish something in a short time, and don't do several things at the same time. I support the development of various skills, but please remember that it is great for a person to do one thing well all his life.

There is nothing to say about financial management, four words: open source and reduce expenditure.

You haven't honed your skills yet, so open source, what are you driving? Pinch the needs of some people, which may be daily needs or special festivals. I won't elaborate on this part. There are many articles sharing entrepreneurial experience in Zhihu.

As for reducing expenditure, it is entirely up to the individual's will. With so many accounting software on the mobile phone, the next one depends on how much he earns and spends a month.

Off-topic: don't borrow big money! Don't borrow big money! Don't borrow big money! Don't ask me why (angry face)

10. Treat people sincerely and be grateful.

Many people may not have noticed this, but this is what I want to say most.

Although I can save my life for you at any time, I should be kind to everyone around me, love you, love you and love my parents.

With the changes of the times, the previous generation has gradually failed to keep up with the current pace of life and way of thinking. The only idea is that their children can live a smooth life. Contradictions arising from the way of thinking, try to take a step back.

The older I get, the more I miss the time when I lived under my parents' wings and treated them well. Don't let the rest of the evening be used as a confession of disobedience to your parents.

See here don't hurry to get a spoon (no, I'm not cooking chicken soup (? ˇ_ˇ? :))。

Problems and solutions

Go to bed regularly, turn off your cell phone before going to bed, put it where you can reach it, and set the alarm clock for getting up.

Friends with strong self-control can make good use of mobile phone memos, schedule apps or bring a small notebook with them to develop the habit of taking notes. If you have poor self-control, buy a notebook, record the next day's plan in detail the night before, and check the implementation the next night (don't browse the notebook here, or you will accidentally fall into your pocket, and draw everything that can be recorded in an hour and ten minutes).

Well, seeing this, many people are facing some problems. (1) What should I do if I have a fever for three minutes? (2) What should I do if the environment restricts myself? (3) Why work hard?

(1) First of all, think clearly, when you decide to work hard, it means you have to give up your present ease and leisure, lol, dota, ow, wow ... and meaningless chatting and carnival nightlife. You buy the books, manuals, dumbbells mentioned above, learn musical instruments, art, photography, and take the postgraduate entrance examination. The roommate was so scared that his chin fell to the floor. Why did you suddenly become a good friend when you were lying in the trough? What about the upper bunk brothers who are kings together?

Do you suffer? Shit!

You have sacrificed so much, you should let others know that you are trying!

Then you must show the determination of a strong man to break his wrist and the courage to be a million teachers. Your voice is so loud and powerful, just like a Taoist calling you to cross the sky. Everyone is looking at you and thinking, please start your performance, but you can't insist on giving up halfway. Are you ashamed to breathe? Is it decent on the face?

It's a man. If you bite your teeth, you can hold on.

(2) Whether it is a dormitory, a shared apartment or an office. If you are surrounded by people who surf the Internet all night, blow water, fight landlords at work and wash socks until they shine.

Then let me tell you something, brother. I understand your difficulty. That's how I got here. I can't fucking study in such a lazy place. Reading is too noisy for you to pretend and practice the piano. The exam is coming soon, dragging you all night. After a long time, I will slowly slack off.

Man is a creature that easily drifts with the tide. Moreover, at the initial stage of their efforts, they have no firm belief and are more likely to be shaken. If you can't change the environment, change yourself. Find a quiet person to practice, and one day you will come back with a certificate, or play the violin and lark at the gala. They will realize that you are already very powerful.

(3) I have no reason to work hard. I like to live an ordinary life, which is probably the lie I hear the most. Stop paralyzing yourself with ordinary life. What is an ordinary life? Reaching a well-off society is an ordinary life, and a well-off society is a middle class. Look at you now, can you buy a house and a car without your parents, get married and have children, take care of your parents and afford a serious illness.

You don't have to work hard for your parents, so do you work hard for your children? Nowadays, the class is gradually solidified. Because of their lack of strength, they can't give future generations a better educational environment. Do you want them to be confined to the working class all their lives? If you don't care about this, at least work hard for your future.

Unwilling? Do you like to pretend? Work hard if you like it, or pretend to be forced.

Go now!

Also, a message for single dog:

What if you still don't have a girlfriend? Keep the change, brother! Look at those male gods, with good family background, good study and beautiful girlfriends. Hey, I'm so angry.

Falling in love takes more time than you expected. Without any emotional experience, I will only be busy. After spending parents' hard-earned money, we still have to break up in the graduation season, and the investment and income are completely out of proportion. You have lost a lot, don't think about falling in love, otherwise the gap will only get bigger and bigger.

Throw away unrealistic fantasies, delete dating software early, give yourself time to grow up and become a hero before she gets married. Who will die then is still unknown.

If you don't consider practical factors, you must force your girlfriend.

Finally.

The above suggestions are all suggestions, but how to implement them depends entirely on the individual. Man is not a machine, and can't rotate day and night. He relaxed himself a little, tried to make good use of 60% to 70%, and made achievements in continuous progress, which was not bad. If 60% cuts off 20% or 30% of efforts, it will really become laziness, slow down time and let yourself down.

Before you try hard, you are uneasy and vacillating, encouraging yourself that a person can endure any kind of life if he knows what he is living for. It is not until you manage your life with your heart and look at your energetic appearance every day that you will know that a moderately relaxed life after reasonable planning is truly fascinating.

Finally, I will share with you a method of reading. You can have a look if you are interested.

This is the view of an elder. I have been reading books for several years and find them very useful. Share it with everyone here.

Reading, like eating, is divided into three categories. Dinner, fruit (dessert), snacks.

1). Dinner class

A person's daily energy intake comes from three meals a day, which is a rigid demand. What can be helpful to study and work is dinner. For example, preparing for the language proficiency test, taking the CCIE test, and taking the constructor test ... then the relevant books are just needed at present. It must take up your whole study time, and all other reading plans should make way for it, otherwise it will be a waste of time.

How to eat dinner? Chew slowly and digest well.

2) Fruit (dessert)

The definition of such books is very broad, but it is also easy to understand. Everything is used to supplement one's own level, including cultivating one's own literary atmosphere, supplementing knowledge and laying a foundation for future planning. It's all listed here.

Suggestion: If we cultivate the self-satisfied temperament of taking poetry as a book, we should read books such as literature and history throughout.

There are professional books that lay the foundation for future development or have strong knowledge, and you should concentrate on reading them in your spare time.

Biography, life, philosophy and life books should be browsed rather than read too much.

How to eat fruit? Pay attention to a small number of meals, but not more than the main meal, not to chew repeatedly.

3) Snacks and supper.

Pulp Fiction, gossip, comics, magazines.

Just as spicy noodles can't be eaten as food, it's no use reading such books in the toilet.

What, you ask me how to eat snacks? How else do you want to eat? Don't eat if you can't eat. Eat too much and wait for the hospital!

Please pay special attention to:

Beware of fragmented reading! Beware of fragmented reading! Beware of fragmented reading!

The only use of fragmented reading is that when several people are talking about mountains, you can boast a lot of awesome things that others have never heard of, and besides, you get very little!

Don't study psychology today, read economics tomorrow, and think back to what you have browsed online. How much can you remember? Articles you saved in your favorites, articles you said you would read when you were free, and several articles you have read. Are there some links that can't be opened now

Speaking of which, some people may ask how much you have achieved: about 80%.

We can walk slowly, but we will never retreat.

Don't be impatient while you are young.