Sketch fortune telling is funny.

Crosstalk "Year of the Pig"

[The background music "Song of the Pig" plays in the background]

Pig! There are two holes in your nose.

You have a cold and a runny nose, Niu Niu.

Pig! You have black eyes.

Look, look, look, I can't see the edge.

Pig! Your ears are so big.

Fan after fan can't hear me calling you stupid.

Pig! Your tail is curly and curly.

It turns out that running and jumping can't be separated from it, oh.

Zhu tou Zhu nao Zhu Shen Zhu Wei (yi) ba

A good doll who is never picky about food.

Sleep three strokes in the sun every day.

Never brush your teeth, never fight.

Pig! Your stomach is very bulging.

I can tell at a glance that you can't stand the hardships of life.

Pig! Your skin is so white.

I must have voted for a rich family in my last life, oh.

It is said that your ancestors had eight rakes.

The fortune teller said that he was hit by a peach blossom.

I laugh and laugh when I see a beautiful girl.

No blushing, no fear, oh

Pig head, pig brain, pig body and pig tail

A good doll who is never picky about food.

Sleep three strokes in the sun every day.

Never brush your teeth, never fight, oh

It is said that your ancestors had eight rakes.

The fortune teller said that he was hit by a peach blossom.

I laugh and laugh when I see a beautiful girl.

Don't blush, don't be afraid

A smiled and walked onto the stage.

B don't understand: Look at this man, happy as a pig! Looking at Zhuge Liang from a distance is like looking at a pig.

A: The Year of the Rat is prosperous, the Year of the Ox is prosperous, the Year of the Tiger is fierce, the Year of the Rabbit is prosperous, the Year of the Dragon flies, year of the snake is auspicious, the Year of the Horse runs, the Year of the Sheep is released, the Year of the Monkey is high, the Year of the Rooster rises, and the Year of the Dog is prosperous. One zodiac sign is missing, and the Year of the Pig celebrates the New Year!

Well, not bad! In the Year of the Pig, pigs can sing and people can laugh.

2007 is the Year of the Golden Pig. In the year of the pig, it is said that killing pigs is not shameful, and I would rather be a pig than a chicken and duck. Use of pigs: eating meat and peeling. How to eat pigs: braise in soy sauce, stir-fry, dry-fry, steam, wrap jiaozi, steam steamed bread and roast suckling pigs. Pig products: ham, sausage, sofa, leather shoes, etc. Pig's favorite-chicken; How many pigs would die if there were no chickens! What pigs hate most: people and monkeys. The sad place of pigs-Jinhua. Ningxia is a safe place for pigs. Pig brands: Jinhua ham, Shuanghui ham sausage. The image endorsement of northeast pig-killing dishes is pig eight quit. The story of the pig: A butcher has been killing pigs and selling meat for a living. His son was dissatisfied with the present situation and went out to inspect. After visiting a factory, he told his father: People are so excited. There is a pig stuffed here and ham sausage. But you can't copy others, it will be infringement. Do you think we can do this: put ham here and a pig there. After hearing this, my father cursed: Bullshit, that's your mother! Idiom of pigs: pigs are not as good as dogs, pigs are not as good as dogs, pigs can't help trees, people are afraid of famous pigs and strong ones, and dead mice don't feel cold. Pig's proverb: green onions are stuck on the pig's nose-pretend to be an elephant; Pig eight quit to battle-pour a palladium; Pig eight quit to look in the mirror-not a person inside and outside.

Pass B (requires fast and steady pronunciation but clear articulation): Speaking of pig allegorical sayings, there are also two pigs in a trough-grabbing food to eat; Three dollars for a pig's head-that is, a mouth; Three hundred catties of wild boar-get a big mouth; Wild boar in the mountains-very fierce mouth; A thousand-year-old wild boar-food for tigers; Beggars raise pigs-little expectation; Daughter-in-law buys pig viscera-on tenterhooks. China Host Friends Network; Don't put soy sauce on the pig's feet-white mention (hoof); Shut the pig in the cowshed-unreliable; Build a pigsty on the ridge-the fertilizer and water will not fall outside the mortar; Sow ears-soft; The sow went into the cornfield-looking for a stick; Sows destroy the root of the wall-disorderly arch; Sows suspect rice bran-abnormal; Sows pry melon vines-disorderly arch; Lao Tzu steals pigs and cows-one is fiercer than the other; Old sows fight-talk without action; Old sow eats discus-hard mouth; Old sow eats bowl dregs-full of words (porcelain); The old sow fights with the cow-giving her life; Old sow climbs stairs-climbs high; The old sow chased the rabbit-she was out of breath; The old sow wandered in the garden-looking for a chance to be beaten; Old sow and cow fight-give up face; Born of tigers and pigs-evil and stupid; The old fat pig went to the slaughterhouse-the stabbed goods; The old harrier fell on the pig-he saw the darkness of others, but he could not see himself; Dead pigs are not afraid of scalding-they come out; Eat a pig's chin-love to talk; Eating pork and chanting Buddhist scriptures-fake good people; Kill the pig and gut it-search the intestines and scrape the stomach; Kill the pig without blowing-wither (fire recedes); Kill a pig without shedding hair-blow it up first and have a look; Kill pigs and divide water-everyone cares; Pencil sharpener for killing pigs-all by know-how; The way to kill pigs-there are guys; Kill the pig and poke the ass-each has its own way; Kill the pig and cut the ear-not the key; Swallowed pig bile and chewed coptis chinensis-suffered one after another; Feed the pigs in the jar-one by one; Two dollars for a pig's head-it's cheaper for him; The knife that nails the pig-be quick; Blind pig barking-blind hum; Lin rushed to the wild pig forest-launched a rescue; The fat pig ran into the butcher's house-looking for death; The pig ran into the butcher's house-the meat was delivered to the door; The pig head in the temple-each has its own owner; Bleeding pig-get down; Can't reduce pork and tofu-bully the weak and fear the hard; The pig head in the city god temple has its own; The crows in the tree-the pigs in the pigsty-are the same color; Planting crops to kill pigs-blowing the atmosphere to eat; Pigs in pigsty-inevitably get a knife; Shave the pig with a razor-cut it out and shave it; Hanging pigs under the eaves-bitter water dripping; Pig bile on the eyebrows-suffering in front of you; Wolves only bite lame pigs-bullying the weak; A pig's hoof without meat-bitch; Wolves cherish baby pigs-that's not enough.

A is connected to the cavity, and B is connected (the tone pronunciation is required to be fast and steady, but the pronunciation is clear): Hungry Han Gun is a pig's head-arguing; Hungry pigs occupy the wooden trough-never let go; Wild boar head is a tribute-insincere; Pig eight quit to worship Buddha-the mountain heart is unstable; Pig eight quit to thirty-six changes-not good-looking; Pig eight quit is not a fairy-ugly mouth; Pig eight quit is not a fairy-ugly mouth; Pig eight quit to lose his temper-ugly and evil; Pig eight quit to learn from the west-half-hearted; Pig Bajie crossed the flaming mountain-turned the rake upside down; Pig eight quit to eat ginseng fruit-bitter; Pig eight quit to eat coptis chinensis-bitter mouth; Pig eight quit to eat pig crow-self-harm; Pig Bajie is a hero-just full of joy; Pig eight quit to buy pig liver-a rare heart; Pig Bajie entered the daughter country-I saw it; Pig eight quit to enter the slaughterhouse-contribute yourself; Pig eight quit to shaw's wife-willingly; Pig eight quit to sell fried liver-which lung is this; Pig Bajie sells bean jelly-there are not many samples-it tastes a lot; Pig eight quit to marry-black light; Pig Bajie's martial arts-raking; Pig mouth-self-appreciation; Pig eight quit blind date-afraid of showing his face; Pig eight quit to play tricks-rake; Pig eight quit to arch the curtain-import first; Pig eight quit back daughter-in-law-willingly; Pig eight quit carrying his daughter-in-law-willing to spend effort; Pig eight quit fell into the kaleidoscope-full of ugliness; Pig eight quit chewing pears-what gods eat what fruit; Pig Bajie wants to marry a wife-wishful thinking; Taking photos of Pig Bajie-asking for embarrassment (see); Pig eight quit to look in the mirror-smelly; Pig eight quit to fall in the mirror-afraid of making a fool of yourself; Pig Bajie wears earrings-he thinks he is beautiful; The flowers worn by Pig Bajie-the uglier; Pig large intestine-no way; Bathing in pork soup-boring; Bathing in pork soup-boring; The pig arches forward-the chicken survives and then plans-each has its own doorway; Pig urine bubbles hit people-the plot is heavier; Pig's head bone-dead but not stolen; Raising camels in pigsty-outstanding; The pig woman eats the coating-she eats it herself; Dig loach in a pig's mouth-you can't dig it out even if you are dead; The trotters are salt-free-Dan (light) angle (foot); The trotters are salt-free-Dan (light) angle (foot); Bristle brush-thick and hard; Pigs in sacks-I don't know black and white; Castrated pigs cut their ears-both are bitter; Pigs in slaughterhouses-slaughtered at will; Cooked pig head-never talk; Lu zhishen made a scene in the wild pig forest-coarse and fine; Eating shredded pork and fried dough sticks-I'm tired of it; Belonging to pig-meat products; Belongs to pigs-can eat but not dry; Belongs to pigs-can eat and sleep; What I ate in my mouth was rotten pig hair-a mess; Digging teeth and gnawing pig's trotters-cross lacing.

Answer: Be the first one in spring, and make six animals and pigs first.

B: People get rich, pigs get rich.

A: People are full of love in the prosperous times, and pigs are full 18 years old.

B: People live longer and longer, and the pond is full of fish and pigs.

A: The Great Sage exorcises the Buddha Road, and the canopy is worth a good year.

B: A righteous dog keeps the door, and a good dog reports the New Year.

A: If you have a long-term vision, the sea is six numbers in two Song Dynasties.

B: It's a prosperous time, another high year.

A: 10-year-old middle-aged pigs are rewarded and climb higher and higher.

B: If the weather is fine, it would be better if it were fine in spring. The more food pigs have, the happier they are.