Stand-up comic dialogue lines

1. Last time I drank too much, I used chopsticks as chicken feet and ate one and a half.

If you don't eat green food for three days, your eyes will see stars. Eating meat is better than not drinking soup. Eat more noodles and soup to avoid prescribing medicine. Weakness deceives others, strength deceives others. Eat three slices of ginger in the morning, such as ginseng chicken soup.

The simplest thing in this world is talking. Yes, you said I should spit on the nail, didn't you? Then I also said that people have two skins on their mouths, which makes sense. If you say revenge is not a gentleman, I also say that the prime minister can punt in his stomach. If a thin camel is bigger than a horse, is a feathered phoenix not as good as a chicken?

4. At dawn, the peach blossoms in the yard are red. One for my father, one for my mother and one for my brother. Brother doesn't want to eat grapes Grapes are flowing, I want to eat leg of lamb. The leg of lamb bleeds and wants to eat the old turtle

5.oh! He grinned at me! You think I dare not stew you. If we had a pot at home, I would stew you.

6. The poor make ten steel hooks on the cross street, but they can't hook their relatives; The rich people are in the mountains and forests, and they can't break up meaningless guests and friends with their clubs. The general has a gun in his hand and can't stop the words "hunger and cold". Heroes may not be heroes so far.

7. Go in? No way! At her age and my age, people have two skins on their mouths, and they are all done! The base of the tongue is crushed to death! There is a person who can talk, but can't listen. You can't wash it off if you jump into the Yellow River! I have to take care of everything, this!

8. Ding-ding, bowl maker, thinking about drinking rice soup, drilling a rolling pin with his eyes, thinking about white flour soup, nailing palladium to the lid, eating mixed noodles, and nailing the bottom of the pot into a windowsill eye!

9. The old man is in good health, that is, his mouth is full of teeth, only one tooth is left, and his teeth are still stuffed when he eats ... He eats lotus roots in his eyes.

10, some people say that I have changed. In fact, I am still the same as before, but I am covered in mud in the well. Someone looked at me by the well and thought it was fun. Then I came up, washed my clothes and drove away. The man by the well said I was bloated. Actually, it's not that I'm inflated, it's that he's lost. Why don't I feel this way about others myself? I'm really ashamed.