Father's love, in my name, reading questions (50 points)

My father didn't name me. My father is an out-and-out farmer and out-and-out illiterate. At the time of my full moon, my father specially invited a famous fortune teller in the village and learned that I was LMNT, and because my father wanted me to jump out of a poor mountain village when I grew up, the fortune teller gave me such a name: Jinxiang. However, because of this name, my childhood was very lonely-the "war" game that my friends often played wouldn't let me join-and they would mock like books: "Jinxiang, what bad luck it is to surrender today!" So he left me alone. That feeling is beyond my father's consideration. I don't know if my father didn't go to school all day, or was busy with heavy farm work all day, or failed to get rid of poverty. His long-term moping, bad temper and eagerness for success constitute his unique way of disciplining me-the baby's promise is beaten and scolded! And my hatred for my father, it is in this experience again and again, constantly intensified and deepened. So, when I received the college admission notice, I rushed to the top of the mountain and cried. It's not that I became the first college student with a bright future envied by the whole village after ten years of cold window, but that I can finally get rid of my father's control and realize my dream of not seeing him! Therefore, I disdain my thrifty father's big banquet and am busy entertaining the villagers who come to congratulate me; Therefore, when I rushed out of the house, I was so anxious and desperate that I didn't care about my father's sadness at all ... In the first two years of studying in the provincial capital, I didn't go home once, nor did I write a letter to my father seriously. Even every time I receive the living expenses from him, I just write a sentence like "The money has been received, don't miss it". Until my junior year, my father wrote a letter to me, and my soul and conscience were strongly shocked. I began to know how to chew and read the heavy fatherly love of "hatred" that has been repeatedly ignored in my life ... The letter was written by my father when he found my little nephew in junior high school. Nothing important, just asking me if I'm okay. I wrote a few pages credibly, only because my little nephew recorded in detail a dream of my father that night: I dreamed that I was eating steamed stuffed buns, and just after I took a bite, my two big teeth disappeared inexplicably. At first glance, the steamed stuffed bun was red, and his teeth stuck to it ... After waking up, my father couldn't sleep any more, so he asked my little nephew to write a letter at dawn. It's just because there is a saying in my hometown that dreaming of losing my big teeth will kill my loved ones. My father's first thought is his son who left home to study. After reading this, I scoffed at my superstitious father's practice and even complained. Finally, the little nephew told a story that surprised him, saying that just as he spread out the paper and began to write, he suddenly stopped because he couldn't remember my name for a moment, and was scolded by his father: "It's a pity that the son of a bitch has read so many books and his memory is too lazy. Called' Jinxiang'! " The little nephew of "Jinxiang" wrote it on paper while chanting. "Write wrong! Wrong writing! " The little nephew said that his father looked at the name he had just written and shouted. Then, I grabbed the pen from his hand, scratched the word "Jinxiang" on the paper and told him, "I only know these two words in my life!" The little nephew said that he was too surprised to speak at that time. You know, the whole village knows that Mr. Zhong doesn't know a word, including his own name! This is fatherly love! Apart from fatherly love, this strange and real phenomenon can't be explained! At that moment, my soul, which was wrapped by my "hate" father and became ignorant, rough and numb, was deeply burned and awakened! I couldn't help but burst into tears and walked to my hometown with a letter in my hand. I suddenly knelt down-to my father, the father who gave me great love in my life but didn't understand, let alone repay, repent and kowtow ... 4. Read paragraphs 5-7 and briefly describe the process of my inner change.