Funny jokes, happy smiles.

1? On the first day of school, after cleaning up and lying in bed, a buddy asked me where I came from. I said it was from Handan. Dude, what a coincidence! A man with glasses in our dormitory is also from Handan, so I sat up and looked at him with glasses.

2 "What would you think if someone gave you10 million to your boyfriend?" "I will feel unbelievable, even a little dumbfounded. After all, it is very rare to have two good things at the same time in one day. "

3? A girl, nearsighted and without glasses and watches, ran into the street in Hanfu and asked, "What time is it?" A man with glasses said in a panic, "It's 20 19 years ..."

A friend went to tell a fortune, and the fortune teller said, "You will have a catastrophe in 250 years." Friend: "Why, someone dug a grave."

I went to the bakery in my new cloak coat, and my arms shrank in because of the cold. As a result, the boss thought I was disabled and refused to accept money. He also hung a bread bag around my neck. In order not to disappoint my boss, I went out at all costs. Just give me the twelve dollars I saved and give you five-star praise!

6 ? A boy likes chatting online. One day, he chatted with a sister in the same city online and made an appointment to meet today. So he went to ask his mother for 200 yuan. She asked what it was for. He said she gave him 200 yuan for a date. The boy went out happily, but he saw his father as soon as he went out. Dad said, "I don't know what it's like to take out a hundred dollars and spend half a month." The boy said, "Dad, I don't know what it's like to smoke.

One day, when the husband came home from work, the wife had cooked the meal. The wife said, "honey, you have worked hard." You can choose today's dishes. " Hearing this, the husband's wife was too kind to him today, so the husband asked, "What's the dish today?" The wife said, "scrambled eggs with tomatoes", and the husband said, "What can I choose for a dish?" Wife: You can choose to eat or not.

Today, after quarreling with me, my wife and I had a heart-to-heart talk. I think she must regret it. She looks very hungry and sincere. My wife called me over and said to me, "Husband, I find that every time I quarrel with you, I have a feeling!" " I said, "Is it a feeling of regret?" The wife said, "I don't feel good every time!" " "

9 ? Dad, something's wrong! Something happened! "I quickly whispered. Dad watched TV and said, "What's the panic? What happened? "Me:" My mother found the 200 yuan I had hidden, and now I am angry in the back room. . . Dad said angrily, "this! How does dad usually teach you? It depends on what you do this time! "

I said calmly, "Dad, I hid the key in your shoes!" " "

10, I took the bus and saw a triad brother with tattoos and sunglasses give up his seat to an old woman. In fact, people with tattoos are not bad, and it's not bad to think about it. Grandma also gratefully said to Big Brother, "Thank you!" Big brother came and said, "Be polite to me!"

Source network intrusion?