Teach you to see through a stranger

A student asked me, "Mr. Hu, how can I make others notice my existence?" In fact, everyone really wants to get more attention and attention in interpersonal communication. Whether in the workplace or in daily communication, we will always meet all kinds of strangers, turn each other into friends or enemies, or continue to be strangers, depending on whether your social skills are in place. See through each other and win trust, and your life will get smoother and smoother.

Many people don't know how to talk to strangers, they don't know what to say when chatting, and they can't communicate with strangers, because they think others disguise their hearts with masks. It is difficult to draw a tiger's skin without knowing its heart.

In contemporary society, is there such a technology that can see through each other's psychology through some subtle expression changes and some subtle behaviors? For example, flustered eyes, such as red-faced or blue-faced facial expressions, such as behavioral changes.

Teacher Hu told you that there is a super power called "cold reading", which is used by magicians and fortune tellers in real life. In short, convincing people that "this person knows my secret" is a skill, which can make them feel that they have met a bosom friend and gain their trust.

For example, chatting with an unknown woman can reveal her family, work, hobbies, ideas and so on. Use the right skills at the right time. What will the other party think?

The lady might think, "How did he know? How does he know me so well? He is too powerful! " She may be curious about you and gradually develop a good impression on you.

Doesn't that sound amazing? In fact, it is not difficult to use. In fact, many people who are good at interpersonal communication unconsciously use the "cold reading method". Blessed are the single men who are reading this article. Teacher Hu teaches you some great "mind-reading" skills. Knock on the blackboard!

First, if you want to talk to a girl, how should you approach her?

The answer is: approach from the side where the other party didn't take the bag or luggage. One side of the human body is alert and the other side is relatively dull. People are more alert to the dull side. So women will use the slower side to carry their backpacks for self-defense. At this point, if you strike up a conversation from one side of the opponent's bag, that is, from the defensive side, the possibility of being rejected will be much higher.

What if the other party doesn't have a bag? There are other methods, such as observing the dividing line of hair. The forehead that looks wider is the more alert side; The hidden side of the forehead is the darker side.

Second, how to test the progress of your relationship with her?

Tip 1: Cup technology. If you are drinking with the other person, pretend to inadvertently move your cup close to the other person's cup during the chat. If the other person doesn't move the cup, it means that the distance between them is shortened.

Tip 2: Bagging skills. If you see the other person intentionally putting the bag between you and her, it means that she is still a little wary of you. You have to slow down the pace of communication a little, or keep your distance, not too close.

Third, how do you feel that there is still a distance, what should I do?

Tip 1: In the first conversation, if you inadvertently extend your hand to the other person, the other person's subconscious will think that this person is not resisting me, but being honest with me. On the other hand, if the other person can't see the palm with her hands crossed, it means that she is still on the defensive.

Tip 2: When the other person is talking, he will definitely breathe, pause and think. When the other person inhales and exhales, you nod slowly. Please note that you are not nodding at the content of your speech, but nodding deeply and slowly with the rhythm of the other person's breathing.

Finally, Mr. Hu concluded that when using the "cold reading method", we must make a positive interpretation. Use non-absolute and ambiguous language to try to figure out each other's psychology. Once you read it correctly, the other person will be excited and curious; It doesn't matter if you read it wrong. Tell him that your subconscious is like this, and you may not feel it yet. Then change the subject and say another topic.

"Cold reading" can help you close the relationship and feelings with strangers, which is a very important skill, so everyone must learn and master it.