Is there a stand-up comedy line like Xie Xueshi's? Is .......... urgent?

It's very hot in the dog days in June.

There is a Zhangjiawan in JD.COM.

The old couple are eating in the yard.

Here comes a fly, which is really annoying.

This fly took a grain of rice,

The old man angrily chased Sichuan.

My wife waited at home for three months,

The book didn't arrive, the letter didn't pass,

I hired a fortune teller to do the math,

Mr. Wang said, "If you break it according to divination, you will lose money and make you angry."

His divination is really clever. In fact, this six-year-old is smart not only for him, but also for me. What is the score? Let an old lady do the math.

"Sir, you give me a divination."

"What is it?"

"My old man has been gone for three months, and I haven't heard from him. Do you think it is dangerous? "

"Oh, what did he do?"

"Well, chasing flies!"

"Go after flies? ! What is it? "

"The fly took a grain of rice."

Of course, it is also a waste of money and anger to compensate for the tolls. Whether you can get it back or not will hurt your money and make you angry. This is nonsense. This divination has no spirit. Sometimes the spirit, he is ignorant, he has a set of methods to calculate divination. As soon as you stand there, he will convince you as soon as he talks to you. How to convince him? Look at his methods. This hexagram pays attention to "Yao Chun". What do you mean by "Yao Chun"? You're the one who divines. I won't do it for you first, but I will arrange it for you first. When I speak jargon, I call it "Yao Chun". The divination is about "patting the spring" and "cheating the spring". Obviously, he didn't understand you, and he insisted on lying to you! Right? He also has an idea. If there is anything wrong, he can get it back. I thought you said you couldn't take it back. He can take it back. This is the so-called "breaking the chain". There used to be fortune tellers on the overpass. As soon as this stopped, he said it. "This person when at home, this when outside, this business. Oh, dear! This man, your Tang Yin is shining, and your wealth is thriving. You should have a fortune in May this year ... "There are three words at the bottom: right? But he won't say this "right". Why not? He is afraid that when he finishes, people will tell him "no"! Then what should I do? He didn't say, he said slowly, "You should have a fortune on May 1 this year ..." He didn't go on, he watched. If that person really has wealth, he can see it; if that person doesn't, he can see it. what do you think? His method is called "there is a fixed eye, but there is no blink of an eye." If you are right, this person is of course stunned; If you are wrong, you should roll your eyes (learn to roll your eyes). That's not true. He saw it!

"You should have a fortune in May this year ..." He looked at you and then at this. He knew it was wrong, so he quickly recycled it. He has something to say:

"... oh, by the way, you should have a fortune on May Day, but you haven't got it yet, have you? "Hey, this is not nonsense!

"Dude, you don't look so good. You should be prosecuted in August this year ... "

There is also a "yes" under it, not to mention that he looks at that one and rolls his eyes at that one.

"Ah, you should go to court, but with the help of a noble person, you have been shelved. Maybe you don't know now? "

Don't say he doesn't know, not even him! He'll say that. Therefore, divination is not true. Ah, don't say you have divination spirit. Wow, not only a spirit, but also a diviner. Spirit is spirit. This thing is ridiculous. How does it work? Let me tell you something. Not now, during the Daoguang period of the Qing Dynasty, there was such a thing. Not far from Beijing, there is such a village dozens of miles away. There lived a farmer in this village. This man is surnamed Huang and nicknamed "Toad"! The man said, "This is new. Does anyone have this nickname? Ah, because he looks particularly like this, with two small round eyes, upturned nostrils, a big mouth, a pockmarked face, black or not, yellow or not, and a green face. So, this nickname is Yellow Toad! Although this man is ugly. He is capable, eloquent, and able to observe the face. After studying for a few days, he flipped through the almanac when he was free. Whoever marries a wife, hires a girl and digs a grave in the neighborhood will come to him. What are you doing? He would look at the imperial calendar and let him choose the date. He is also willing to mind his own business. If he says a few words, someone will really believe him and regard him as a prostrate saint! Although he is so clever, his wife is a burden. What happened to his wife? Gross. What's the matter? This disease is terrible, my legs are cold! Two cold legs, if you are not sick, you can still use them to do some farm work. Once you get sick, you can't leave the ground. This disease still happens frequently. When will this cold leg disease break out? If the weather changes, you will make a mistake. My leg hurts on cloudy days, and it hurts on rainy days. In order to catch up with it, when his wife was ill, he had to cook when he came home from the fields. Why? His wife can't go to the fields! After a long time, he was anxious and annoyed. He also found such a trick. Whenever his wife says her leg hurts, alas, it will be cloudy again tomorrow. If it hurts badly, it's ... rain! He's ready. On one occasion, his wife stayed up all night, and the next day Lao Huang went to work in the fields. God, it was sunny, but it was sultry and hot. Old Huang, just put on this hemp fiber! Go outside with a hoe and hemp fiber. His wife took a look: "Lao Huang, crazy! The weather is really nice. Why are you wearing linen clothes? Take it off! "

Lao Huang ignored her and went out. His wife looked at it: "Hey! What's going on here? Let you take it off! "

He took a step forward, which means pulling Lao Huang. He just took such a step, "Ouch!" My leg hurts. "Ouch ..." Squatting there. Lao Huang turned back happily: "Hey ... why am I still wearing hemp fiber?" Your leg hurts, doesn't it? You've been making trouble all night! Won't it rain today? What if you don't wear hemp fiber? "

His wife is also very happy. They were very happy, but when Lao Huang went out, people in the street were very happy. Why?

"Ah, second brother, why is this yellow toad? Begging for rain? Hey, it's a nice day. Why are you wearing linen clothes? Take it off! "

Lao Huang said confidently, "If you don't take it off, you'll need it later!"

"What are you doing? What's the use for a while? "

"What's the use? It's raining today! "

What he means is that his wife's leg hurts. Isn't it nonsense when everyone hears it is raining? There are no clouds in the sky. Where is it raining? I didn't believe him, so I went to work in the fields. This work has been done for over an hour. Hey! Suddenly, I looked up and saw a black cloud coming from the south and coming at me like the bottom of a black pot. It was soon laid, there was a thunder, wow ... it was raining cats and dogs. Everyone ran home, drenched like a chicken. Look at Lao Huang, wearing hemp fiber, shaking every step as if nothing had happened. Hey!

"Old Huang, you are really good!"

Lao Huang loves to blow the air: "Why do you have two down feathers?" By the way, I don't even know it's raining on cloudy days, especially so! "

What does he mean? My wife's leg hurts. Can I not know? Everyone has a look, wow, Lao Huang is really capable! A few days later, I got up early in the morning. It's cloudy and cloudy. Lao Huang is going to work in the field. First, he asked his wife, "How's it going? Does your leg hurt? "

"It doesn't hurt."

"It doesn't hurt, ok!"

He came out with a hoe and took a look. Well, many people are covered with hemp fibers.

"Hey, Lao Huang, go home and get hemp fiber!"

"Take that? Strange and troublesome! "

"annoying? Don't take it for a while! "

"Get what rain? Don't worry, it won't rain today. "

Go to work in the fields. Listen, everyone: it didn't rain? It's so cloudy, it won't rain, will it I just hoed the ground for two ridges and watched. Oh, my God, hey, the clouds are clearing away and the sun is coming out. Lao Huang, you are still sarcastic: "What's the matter, you took all the hemp fiber for nothing? I told you, don't listen, look, it didn't rain. "

"Old huang, hey, strange, that day we were caught in the rain, you slowly twist home in hemp fiber. Hmm? Today, we all hold hemp fibers and have leucorrhea. What do you mean? How do you know if it will rain? "

"Ah ..."

How dare he say, "My wife's leg hurts, so I understand." . How do you say this? When everyone asked again, he said excitedly, "Ah, I figured it out by Zhuge Liang's lessons."

Wow, hello, everyone. It's amazing that it can be calculated whether there is rain or not in the early stage of Ma Shen class! It's good to play here. Everyone shouted at him. Come on, what happened before? A man married his wife and hired a girl. He came to see Lao Huang and asked him to show him the imperial calendar. Later, I heard that he wanted to teach Zhuge Liang before the horse. Well, whoever loses something will come to him. Daughter-in-law Zhang lost an earring to find him.

"Uncle, I lost my earrings. Your pre-competition training is very clever. Please help me calculate! "

How can he say: I won't, I will treat it as a rainy day, and my wife will follow me! He can't say!

"Oh, I'll do the math for you."

He pretended to be crazy and thought, "have I lost my earrings?" Okay ... I didn't lose it! "

"Uncle, you said you didn't lose it, but it's gone."

"no! I told you to go home and find it. You'll find it beside the jar and behind the water tank. Go! "

Daughter-in-law Zhang left and went home to look for it, next to the pot. Oh, I really found my earrings. How does his divination work? Lao Huang is hard to think. He thought to himself: she is a daughter-in-law, and her daughter-in-law cooks and carries water every day, except beside the pot table and around the water tank. He said these two places. Well, I really found it at the kitchen counter. Wow! Now it's louder. One day, Li Er's sister-in-law came to see him. Li Ge has been gone for more than three months, and I haven't heard from him. Sister-in-law Li Er came: "Brother Huang, you see we haven't heard from each other for more than three months, and there isn't a letter. I'm really worried. When do you think he will come back? "

"Ah, divination!"

"ah!"

"Well, good"

Pretend to pinch your fingers, he doesn't count first, talking to Li Er's sister-in-law.

"Hey, sister in law, you also is really of, what can I do for you to send someone to come to me? Why do you have to come by yourself? Look at your heavy body, why are you still going out! "

"Ah ... never mind, I'm only nine months old."

"Oh ... well, come out! If you don't come back this month and don't write, you must come back next month. Go ahead. "

Wow, you must come back next month! What happened? I really didn't write it. I'm really coming back next month. It is working again. How does it work? Lao Huang is hard to think. When he heard that he was pregnant for nine months, well, that's what he thought. This woman is pregnant, and he knows it, and he knows it! If you don't write for three months, just wait to come back and serve the moon! Hey, I'm really coming back next month. It's great to call here, so I'm screaming. Not only did he say that he could pinch and calculate, but he also named him "Huang". One spread to ten, ten spread to hundreds, hundreds spread to thousands, thousands spread to thousands, villages spread to townships, and townships spread to counties. From one hand to the other, to Beijing.

Hey! Old Huang should get rich. Something has been lost in the Beijing Palace! What is missing? Daoguang lost a priceless night pearl! The night pearl is lost like this, and the light is urgent. In the Qing Dynasty, Daoguang was the least angry emperor, not only the least angry, but also a greedy emperor. Calculate, his dragon robe has been patched! So stingy. It would be great if such a night pearl were lost! Send the nine magistrates to the temple at once and give them a big reprimand. Give them three days to find the night pearl, but if they can't find it, they will be demoted and fined!

Three days? I can't get it back in five days! What's the matter? It's not easy to catch stealing the night pearl! Who is it? Cui Ying, the eunuch in charge of the palace, is a mole. Where do you think this thing can be found? Nine magistrates looked outside the palace, but of course they couldn't find them!

I can't find it in three days, so what? Demotion and pay penalty. If you can't find it in five days, you will be demoted to the Golden Temple and fined. To put it bluntly, I haven't found it for a month and a half. It's broken! I haven't found it for a month and a half. These nine magistrates have all been demoted to the Imperial Horse Circle to walk their horses!

On this day, Daoguang was annoyed and broke into a furious rage in the Golden Hall: "I have raised my troops for a thousand days and used them for a while. I have lost the night pearl for more than a month. What if nothing happened to the civil and military officials? " Murphy said, do you all want to walk your horses? "

Everyone was scared when they heard it: hula! Kneel to a large place, there is a poem called Lana Rong, kneeling half a step forward:

"Long live your honor, I heard that there is a fortune teller named Zhuge Zhou outside the front door of Xijiang River. This person can not only divine, but also' round light', and his skill is like a god. If you want to find him, count the whereabouts of the night pearl and you will know! "

Hearing this, the emperor said, "Come on!" Tell Cui Ying, the eunuch in charge, "Go outside the front door and look for Zhuge Zhou. Go into the palace and count the whereabouts of the Pearl at night and find it!"

Cui Yingri grinned with anger. How come? The night pearl is his inside man. Heart said: this assistant minister is old and glorious. Do you kneel well? Why do you have this idea? "Its art is like a god", spirit! Come here and find out I stole it. What should I do? But the emperor issued an imperial edict, and he had to find it. No, ride a horse! I took it from someone else. When I arrived at the Xijiang River, I asked. The first door, the one in the north of the road, went to the front and took a look. Very good! There are three white Chinese fir pillars with Yang Liuzhi's son tied to them, and a white note that says "I'm sorry to bring this bad news". Ask, Zhuge Zhou is dead! Hey, Cui Ying is so happy! All right, tell the emperor. Hearing this, the emperor said:

"If you die, find someone else, find someone else to calculate divination, and be smart!"

"hey."

Look again! Once again, I came to the mill head factory and saw a sign hanging at the door of a life museum: "Liu Tiezui". Cui Ying dismounted and came in.

"Can you calculate divination?"

Liu Tiezui looked at this style ... "Ah, I can do divination."

"Is it invalid?"

"Did you see my name not posted? Liu Tiezui', because I'm Kouga with an iron mouth, and I'm a diviner! "

"Well, really smart?"

"Ah, how clever!"

"So ... see you later!"

The soothsayer looked, where is this snoring in broad daylight? Tell him ling, he "see you later", what's wrong with that! How did he know? Cui Ying dare not look for the true spirit. Yes, his head has moved.

No, find someone else. I found another one. There is a "Kong Liming" pavilion on Qianmen Street. You ask there, it is also a kind of spirit! "See you later!" He went out again.

He pondered: No! Quan Ling, what should we do? Oh, by the way, don't look for the pavilion of life, look for the divination pavilion on the overpass. Yes! Find a hexagram stand and ask:

"Is your divination invalid?"

He also said spirit. It's all about the divination pavilion. Not working? Who can't tell? What does he eat? I asked several divination booths, and they all said, wow, wow, but I searched in Beijing for three days. I've searched all the divination booths in Beijing, but I can't even find one! What should I do? On the fourth day, when I went to see my boss, I was bored: I looked everywhere inside and outside the city, right! Xinma rode out of the city with his entourage and the reins. After walking dozens of miles, I was hot and tired and came to a village.

"Come on, have a rest!"

I got off the horse and saw a child under the tree. I asked, "Hey, do you have a fortune teller here?"

"Yes, this door!" Ah, it's Huang's door. The child is so sharp.

"Oh, great!" Go inside.

On this day, Lao Huang was at home. What is he doing at home? I'm worried about there. What is there to worry about? His wife's leg hurts again. It's going to rain again. After a while, he will bring firewood and things into the house, please! It's really annoying here. After such a long time, ah, Cui Ying, the eunuch's manager, came in.

"Can you calculate divination?"

Hearing this, Lao Huang said, "Ah … I … I will …"

"Is it invalid?"

This question is invalid, and the voice is quite loud. Seeing his style, Lao Huang said to himself, Where can I go for this divination? Simply tell the truth!

"My divination ... alas ... my divination ... alas ... is useless."

"hmm? Hey! I've been looking for it for a long time, but here it is! Okay, okay, oh, it's useless? Is it really invalid? "

"Alas ... I really can't!"

"Oh, come on, come on, come with me!"

"Where to go with you?"

"When I was in Beijing, the emperor's pearl was lost. You have to calculate! "

Hearing this, Lao Huang: What? Divination for the emperor. Isn't this nonsense? Don't say the calculation is invalid. If you say one wrong word, you will be guilty of turning back. "Said quickly ... the master ... you ... didn't understand, my divination, it doesn't work! "

"Nonsense, spirit is not for you! Go away! "

"Sir ... my divination ... is useless!"

"It doesn't matter whether it works or not. I'm telling you, even if it doesn't work, I'll put in a good word for you. What does it matter if the money is gone? If you don't go, you will disobey orders and ask questions outside the noon gate! "

"Oh, no charge!" I thought: if you don't go, then you will die. If not, you can give them some money and blow them out. ...

"Well, ... I ... Can I go?"

"Don't waste time! If you don't go, you will disobey orders. Go! " Without asking for anything in return. Let's leave now.

"Hey ... I'll go, I'll go ... you look after the house at home."

"Hey, look at this ... it's not bad luck. My leg still hurts. Look, are you leaving now?

"Oh, no, don't go? If you don't obey orders, your leg will still hurt. Oh, yes, I took hemp fiber! "

Cui Yingri looked: "Long-winded! The weather is so good, what are you doing with hemp fiber? "

"hmm? ..... No, don't worry, you can use it, it's raining today! " He is thinking that his wife's leg hurts and it will rain today. Cui Ying also didn't care too much.

"Ah, let's go!"

Take him to Beijing and arrange to stay in an inn. Lao Huang, I can't eat or sleep. I'm so sad!

"How do you calculate this thing?"

In the middle of the night, well, wow ... it's raining cats and dogs. It's raining, Lao Huang thought. Don't ask, my wife's leg hurts at home. Well, I was caught by a senior official. This master is killing me. I said it was useless. I have to come; He said, give two money out, where there is such a cheap thing? How to calculate for the emperor? All right, throw away the night pearl and let me find it. Where can I find it? Well, if it rains on a cloudy day, I can still work it out-that's not good either! I have to find my daughter-in-law-this thing is looking for the night pearl. How to calculate? Give it to the emperor tomorrow. Where can I ask him to find it? By the stove? Behind the tank? Is there a water tank in that palace? This is not fatal!

I'm sad, but I hate it. Who do I hate? I hate thieves who steal beads. He hates it in his heart. Sitting there in a hurry, his mouth full of words:

"The thief is wrong, well, who dare not steal you? Why steal the emperor? If you knew you stole it, would you live? Besides, this master is also at fault. I said my divination was useless. If I don't come, it's over. You begged me to come, urged me, urged me, can you live? "

He means that you urged me to come, so I came. Can you live if I don't exercise? If I don't count, you are guilty of dereliction of duty, and you can't live. That's what he meant in his heart, pointing out: "I'm coming, can you live?"

Well, this sentence has ears through walls, and someone heard it. Who is it? Cui Ying, general manager. Why did he come? Ah, he arranged for Lao Huang to go to the inn. He went back to the house, set the table, ate and drank, and his heart was full of joy: Oh, forget it, I will give the emperor divination tomorrow, if I can't figure it out, I will kill him, which is none of my business. Hey, this bead, I can't commit crimes in my life! Hey, well, he doesn't look like a capable person. Can a capable person look like this? Happy!

I am very happy here. Wow ... it's raining outside. When it rains, he is alert in his heart. No sooner had he opened the door than it began to rain cats and dogs.

Hmm? No way, his divination didn't work? It doesn't work. Why is he wearing hemp fiber? How did he know it was raining today? Oh, not "a wise head makes a wise mouth, a wise head makes a wise mouth", right? Pay lip service but not pay lip service. Tomorrow, I will go to Jinxitang and do a calculation. I will point out that he is the one who stole the beads! All right, I'm done! Hey, this is unbearable, no ... I have to listen to the news!

Then he came, and no one knew he was coming. He quietly came to the outside of the Huang family. He just stood there listening. When he came, the first two sentences had been finished, and this sentence was being said inside: "Quick, quick!" " I'm coming. Are you still alive? "

He also pointed out. Cui Yingri: Huh? "Hurry up, hurry up, I'm coming", here he comes; Can you live? I ... I can't live! He thought it was me! Oh, he's ... okay. ...

You'd better listen again. He wouldn't listen. He was afraid, so he pushed the door and came in. Goo goo knelt down and said, "Hey ... this ... fortune teller forgives me!" "

Lao Huang was shocked to see the manager kneeling here. When he heard that "the physiognomy forgave his life, the physiognomy forgave his life", he could observe the face and the color. I don't know what happened when he saw the manager spraying all over. He can hold his breath:

"Hey, don't be afraid, don't be afraid, get up and say, get up and say, what's the matter, you?"

"Ah ... oh, the fortune teller forgave me. Your divination is really clever. You're here. I ... I can't live. I know you're right. I stole this bead. I stole it. Please help me. "

Hearing this, Lao Huang: Smell! That's what happened! Old Huang Can really put on an act and held his breath: "Hey ... Oh, you stole it!" ! Hum, I already know that you stole it! I not only know that you stole the beads, but also know where you are hiding. "

Take the words to cheat, Cui Yingri listens, hey, it's all worked out ... I'm also stunned. Can you work it out? Then I'll let him talk.

"Ah, this is ... fortune teller, you figured it out, so you figured out where I hid the beads?"

If this is left to others, if you ask this sentence, you must ask to get down. Lao Huang has a glib tongue. When he heard this:

"Well, come out. Ha ... I said where did you hide the beads, I said? I said yes, but I won't say it now. I'll tell the emperor tomorrow! "

"Ah ... don't price! Why not say it here? "

"What am I telling you here? I said,' I figured it out, I know where you are hiding'? I won't say it, let you say it yourself. I think you dare to lie to me. " Hey!

"Oh ... banxian, please forgive me. I dare not lie. My beads are buried under the banana tree in the imperial garden! "

"Ah, that's all. I think it's buried there! " How many people did we count him? !

"get up."

"Yes, fortuneteller, why are you ... a fortune teller? You are a living fairy. You are indeed right. When you see the emperor tomorrow, please don't say I stole it. I ... will give you five hundred and twenty pieces of silver. "

Hearing this, Lao Huang sneered, "Ha …" What does he mean? Hey, this guy doesn't put pressure on himself anymore! But his sneer, Cui Ying don't know what he is doing, think he is too little.

"Ah ... oh, five hundred and twenty won't do. I'll give you a thousand. " Add another 500!

"Oh, okay, okay, you get up. I'll hide it for you when I calculate the divination for the emperor tomorrow. "

What is this? Before divination, he received a gift of 1200 silver, but he was in trouble. All right!

The next day, Cui Ying took him to see the emperor, who was very happy. He stood up and gave him a seat to count the whereabouts of the night pearl. What about Lao Huang? Although Cui Ying said it, you must pretend to come! I thought to myself: I have to pinch the tactic and recite the spell. Well, pinch tactic (learn gestures), how to pronounce the mantra? When he thinks about it, he won't say anything: "One, two, three, seven, eight, nine ..."

Hearing this, the civil and military officials, what? Magic! What kind of spell is this?

"According to divination, the night pearl is now in the imperial garden." The emperor heard this and said, "Come on, control the garden!"

Swing garden In the imperial garden, the emperor said, "Hey, Master Huang, my imperial garden is so wide. Where is the night pearl? "

"Oh, let me count it for you." (Learn to knead gestures and recite a spell)

"This fortuneteller surnamed Huang. See the king today. Where is the night pearl? Ah ... this banana tree is hidden! "

He can really put on an act! Hearing this, the emperor said, "OK, plan!" Shovel and pick together.

"Hey, be careful, don't hurt the national treasure!"

Wow, this is an act. It turns out that Cui Ying didn't bury the bead too deep, so she planed it twice and dug it out. The little eunuch washed it and handed it to the emperor. The emperor was very happy when he saw it.

"Oh, yellow, really yellow, this divination is too clever. Hey, Master Huang Shixian, who stole my pearls? Who buried it? "

Lao Huang, I didn't guard against asking this. I suddenly asked him and looked up at Cui Ying. Cui Ying, my heart almost jumped out of my throat. I don't know what he is going to say. Just listen to it next.

"Ah ... ah ... long live, the night pearl is a rare treasure. It has been basking in the moonlight for a long time and slipped out by itself! "

The emperor listened and said, "Well, that makes sense!"

Look at this bad king. He still thinks it makes sense! Pearl will walk alone that night?

Back to the golden palace.

"Master huang is really smart. Come on, give it to Master Huang ... two discs of Saqima! " Then find a big treasure and give it to two discs of Saqima, and you will know that he is stingy!

After giving him two plates of satsuma, he was not allowed to leave, and he was allowed to stay in the palace for several days.

The other one asked, why did the emperor leave a fortune teller in the palace when he found the beads?

Daoguang had his thoughts. He thought: I have lost this night pearl for more than a month, and there is no news at all. I can't find it! Hey! When Huang comes, even if he comes out somewhere, this kind of divination is too clever! I can't let him go. I'll call him again. If he is so clever every time he divines, he will be appointed as a court official. It's good for me to make him a court official! No one can hide anything from me anymore! He helped me solve it! Ah, because he won't be allowed to go.

But Lao Huang's heart was very annoyed. Lao Huang thought, isn't this something that has disappeared? Leave me, I ... What am I doing here? A companion is like a tiger! It almost killed me. I know when something will happen to him!

Tired, I thought to myself: I have to think of an idea to tell him tomorrow: I will go home. Yes! Find a way out. The next morning, when Cui arrived, he took Huang to the palace and called the eunuch in the office.

"The imperial edict has come from the holy land, and Huang Xuan Shi will go to the temple with it now!"

He was the first. Why? The emperor found Pearl that night and was very happy. He stayed up all night and came to sit in the temple early after playing in the harem. Go ahead, go to the imperial garden, hey! There is a jujube tree here. This jujube tree was brought back by Sambo, the eunuch of the Ming Dynasty, when he went to the Western Ocean. This kind of jujube is called "Zhuzao". It is round, big and red, but it is ripe. Still alive now, the emperor looked at such dates and picked them and thought about them. Oh, by the way, I'll let Huang calculate what I have in my hand. If he is right again, and his divination is really good, then make him a court official, right!

Then, Huang announced that he would go to the temple first in order. Huang knelt here and saluted. Should he stand up and give up his seat? This time, I just asked him to stand up and didn't give him his seat.

"Stand flat."

Yellow cloth seed stood up, the emperor a clutch this fist:

"Huang, your divination is very spiritual, come on, let you calculate what is in my hand. If it's right, I'll make you an official of the DPRK. Is there something wrong? Let me ask you a charge of cheating you! Count it! "

Lao Huang thought, Oh, how can this be calculated? Ok ... Of course, he's scared, and he's scared in his heart, but he can't show it on his face yet. He has to perform without photos. I thought about it here, and he thought about it. What's he thinking? I thought to myself: What's that in his hand? Oh ... this must be his pearl. I found this pearl, but I'm afraid of losing it again. I can't leave my hand. My hand is not Julie. I took this out in the morning, so don't ask, Pearl, right?

But if he wanted to say "the night pearl", it was wrong to kill him at that time. He's right:

"Long live ..."

He wants to say this sentence "You will enjoy your beloved night pearl in the morning", which is what he just said.

"Long live, early in the morning you ..."

The emperor said, "Ah, yes, it was made in the Qing Dynasty ..."

Hey! He's so smart!

As soon as the emperor let go, Lao Huang saw it, and his pigtails stood on end: Oh, boy, old man, thanks to my saying "early morning", it would be troublesome if I said "early morning", this thing! Yo!

"Long live the adult, I want to go home and have a look."

"Well, no, this divination works again. Come, have a big meal! "

Banquet? The emperor is so stingy and still holds a banquet? What is a feast? Just a bowl of tea and two pieces of "Shaqima"! He called it a party!

I can't help it Eat "Shaqima". I am jealous!

The emperor said, "Master Huang, your divination is too clever. I'm going to let you be an official in the DPRK, accompany the king and enjoy all the splendor. What do you think? "

Old Huang Xin said: I'm still with you? Boy, it's a good thing I said it early in the morning, or my head will move!

Emperor: "Master Huang, your divination is too clever. I intend to make you an official of North Korea. What do you think? "

Huang: "The grass people are all villagers, how can they protect you?"

The emperor thought, "You don't want to. If you don't protect me, if you protect others, my country will be unstable! " ! "The emperor gritted his teeth and came up viciously! Call Cui Yingri and whisper in his ear. Tell Cui Ying to go to the harem and bring Baochan. What is a treasure toad? Just a golden toad. Soon, Cui Ying came back with a box!

The emperor pointed with his hand: "Master Huang, are you a ghost? Find out what's in this box. If your calculation is correct, I will make you an official. If the calculation is wrong, it is a crime of deceiving the monarch. We will have an operation outside the noon gate, yes! "

Lao Huang thought, "I was fooled early in the morning just now. How do I calculate now? " He held back for a long time, gritted his teeth and stamped his foot, calling his nickname: "Yellow toad! You will die in this box! "

Hearing this, the emperor said, "Huh? He's right again! "