Find me a sketch, not a cross talk, but a joke, played by two people. No video, no lines.

Zhao: My back hurts when I sleep, and I feel queasy when I eat. What's the matter? I have been pursuing happiness all my life, and I have got it. What is happiness? A: Happiness is pain.

Song: Some people spend money to eat and drink, some people spend money to order songs, some people spend money on beauty, and some people spend money on massage. Today, I have a good job and someone pays me to chat with people.

Zhao: Oh, my son said to find someone for me to arrive at nine o'clock.

Song: This place beats around the bush. This is the right place. Ding dong.

Zhao: Who is it?

Song: A Mei.

Zhao: Who?

Song: It's me, big brother.

Zhao: Oh, my God, it's sweet in a low voice. The sugar content is quite high, at least four plus signs. (opens the door) Oh, my God, this little old lady with a low voice.

Song: You're welcome. Call your elder sister and ask your mother to do anything. Are you alone in this room?

Zhao: There is also a puppy in that house.

Song: That's you.

Zhao: Huh?

Song: Your son said that the countdown started when I went out. There was a traffic jam on the road just now. It's fifteen minutes before an hour. Come on, ah.

Zhao: What are you doing?

Song: Our aim is to be positive and enthusiastic, and exchange my sincerity for your smile. Come on, I'll take it off first.

Zhao: Big sister, big sister.

Song: Hurry up, there is no time.

Zhao: No, you don't understand. What are you doing?

Song: Sit down.

Zhao: Impossible.

Song: You sit down first.

Zhao: Sister. I have a bad heart.

Song: Shy. Ok, I'll give you two humorous intellectual questions first. First, I will test your IQ. Second, let me ease the awkward atmosphere.

Listen, it's funny.

For example, how many steps does it take to put an elephant in an ice box?

Ha ha ha ha, three steps. Step one, open the refrigerator door, step two, put the elephant in, and step three (sán), close the refrigerator door.

People? (Zhao Benshan turns behind him) Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Look at me laughing like this. Why don't you laugh?

Zhao: What are you laughing at?

Song: Well, no sense of humor, ha. I'll make a debut for you, saying that the zoo held a get-together for all animals. Which animal didn't (mèi) come?

Elephant, it's locked in the refrigerator. hahaha ...............

Zhao: What? Hey yo.

Song: Oh, you are going to kill me.

Zhao: I'm exhausted.

Song: Hmm. ...............

Zhao: Hey. Sister, can we stop laughing?

Song: What?

Zhao: Let's see what our son wants you to do. Can you tell me before you laugh?

Song: Talk to you, talk to you, talk to you.

Z: Escort.

Song: What are you talking about?

Zhao: Sister, I really don't understand why you came. ...

Song: You don't understand. Why do you ask? I tell you, our job is called domestic service when it is big, and it is called hourly work when it is small, and it is called abroad.

Sai Kao is a psychologist, and when translated into Chinese, he is a psychologist. He knows nothing. He left, hurting his pride.

Zhao: Sister. You said I was alone, and I was wronged at home all day. I finally found someone to bring me back from my injury.

Song: Take the money.

Zhao: What money?

Song: Your son said that an hour and forty minutes is an hour.

Zhao: Oh, here is fifty yuan.

Song: I have no change. Take change.

Zhao: I have no change. I gave it to you, sister.

Song: What do I need ten dollars for? Here, take the change.

Zhao: You can't change me, and I haven't changed. Then you can accompany me for another ten dollars.

Song: Then I'll put up with another ten dollars.

Zhao: Oh. Sister, please sit down. I'm really sorry about that. Sit down, hehe. Smoking?

Song: No.

Zhao: What about drinking water?

Song: Bring your own.

Zhao: Eat fruit?

Song: Gross.

Zhao: What are you doing?

Song: What are you talking about?

Zhao: Old.

Song: Go ahead. You've spent ten yuan anyway.

Zhao: Tell you what, elder sister, I'll tell you a little joke, and I'll open an embarrassing situation for you. This joke always makes me laugh. I mean, this joke will be with me for the rest of my life.

Said, there is a tiger, bitten by a snake, the tiger is anxious, just want to trample the snake to death, chasing after, chasing a small river, the snake Ri is in the water, and the tiger is waiting on the river bank. I can't believe you won't come out. Soon, a turtle got out of it, and the tiger went up and held it down. "I don't even know you when you wear a vest (jiá)?"

Ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha, ha ha.

Song: (eyes)

Zhao: Sister, I repeat, I was wrong. No, a turtle fell into the water. When he finished, a snake came out. The tiger said, "I still know you without your vest!" " "

Sister, look at you. Let me tell you a joke. Why do you always cooperate with me with the whole vest?

Song: Let's go.

Zhao: Why?

Song: It hurts self-esteem.

Zhao: Sister, vest!

Song: You give it back to me and you bring it here.

Zhao: (putting on vest) Shall I wear it? You talk.

Song: What are you talking about?

Zhao: Just say, "This snake is in the water. I'll take out a vest at once." . Go ahead.

That would be fun. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Song: You are the big brother. Don't you know a lot about humor? Why does your son always say that you are unhappy?

Zhao: To tell you the truth, Sister.

Song: Huh?

Zhao: So, I am in the countryside.

Song: Ah.

Zhao: I am in the countryside. The old man and the old lady have many brothers.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: Then I will be the focus.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: Later, my son was filial to me.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: He earns some money in the city.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: I was brought to the city. When I got to the city, everything changed. No one spoke, and no one spoke.

Song: Stop it, big brother. I know your situation too well. My analysis of the elderly is quite profound.

Zhao: Ah.

Song: I roughly divide the elderly into three types.

Zhao: Tell me.

Song: emotional loss type, endocrine disorder type, senile dementia type.

Zhao: Then what type do I belong to?

Song: You don't belong to any of these three. You belong to the type that is oppressed by the house.

Zhao: That's right.

Song: Oh.

Zhao: The room is so humbled that I don't know anyone when I come to town.

Song: You said you were fine. Go out for a walk, play chess and dance yangko.

Zhao: Forget it.

Song: Huh?

Zhao: One day, I had no choice but to take a walk in the street.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: You can rarely see the yangko team in the square.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: I saw tears in my eyes.

Song: Oh dear?

Zhao: I finished it in a daze. Just two steps later, three old men tried to hit me.

Song: Why?

Zhao: I said I flirted with that old woman.

Song: You said you didn't know the old lady either. What do you do with people?

Zhao: Impossible. I can do two movements (one twist) when dancing the yangko.

Is this a flying eye?

Song: Isn't that a fly's eye? If your eyes were bigger, they would fly out.

Zhao: Hey.

Song: You, you must be looking at that beautiful old lady, right?

Zhao: Come on, it's beautiful. It's worth fighting. Is it beautiful?

Song: Huh?

Zhao: That old lady is uglier than you. No, I said she is not as ugly as you; You are uglier than her.

Sister, I always hurt your self-esteem.

Song: Brother, don't (biè).

Zhao: Mm-hmm.

Song: I know what kind of person you are.

Zhao: What kind?

Song: You definitely belong to the kind that goes looking for trouble.

Zhao: Sister, tell the truth. I am 60 years old, and my neighbors around the city don't know me. Suddenly I became dumb. I don't know how to play.

Song: Forget it, just leave home, go online.

Zhao: I haven't fished for many years. How can I get a net? After all these years.

Song: I'm talking about computers, surfing the Internet.

Zhao: What about the power grid?

Song: Yes.

Zhao: Computer access?

Song: Computer network.

Zhao: What kind of net?

Song: The Internet.

Zhao: Ha ha ha. I see, you are talking about high technology, the Internet, and you can chat online.

Song: Yes.

Zhao: OK, but that computer is very expensive.

Song: Your consumption concept is not good. Look at me. My mind is full of famous brands.

Zhao: Ah.

Song: My shoes are Adida's. Pants, Pushkin's. Clothes, Clinton's. Belt, Yeltsin's. Look at me again. I use world-class brand-name cosmetics in this pocket.

Zhao: Ah.

Song: I will play whatever the famous American singer MacDonald plays.

Zhao: Madang, who's that?

Song: You don't know him? You must only know her sister.

Zhao: Who is it?

Song: McDonald's.

Zhao: Yes.

Song: My figure.

Zhao: Sister, I really envy you.

Song: Famous brand, rich.

Zhao: Rich. I really envy you. We have no unprovoked contact today.

Song: Why?

Zhao: You will take me there tomorrow. ...

Song: What are you doing?

Zhao: I'll go with you. I will go out to work with you every day.

Song: No.

Zhao: If I can't make money, can I only play? You are the boss, and I am the one who does your job.

Song: Huh?

Zhao: OK, I'll just take a bag.

Song: What can you do?

Zhao: Look, if you specify it, won't you just take this cup? Now I am you and you are me.

Song: Ah.

Zhao: See if I can do it.

Song: What are you doing? What is this?

Zhao: Ding-dong.

Song: Who is it?

Zhao: Andy Lau. Just you, talk to someone.

Song: What?

Zhao: You want to eat and drink, your son is filial, your daughter-in-law says nothing, and you pay someone to chat with you. I think you are the kind of person who has no food to eat or support.

Song: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Zhao: Get out. Can I do that?

Song: You said, you big brother, don't you know everything?

Zhao: Ah.

Song: Why are you always unhappy on such a good day?

Zhao: Sister, I see, old people, you should have fun when you are old.

Song: Right.

Zhao: I have to go out for a while.

Song: Right.

Zhao: I saw you today. What should I say?

Song: Why?

Zhao: (shaking hands) Thank you.

Song: Why thank you?

Zhao: I haven't been so happy for half a year. I haven't said these words for half a year.

Song: Really?

Zhao: Thank you. That's all. Thank you very much.

Song: Brother, do you smoke?

Zhao: I don't drink water.

Song: Do you want to drink water?

Zhao: I don't smoke.

Song: You, you, you sit down.

Zhao: I won't sit down. Sister, you are very busy. I have to go back. Huh?

Song: This is your home.

Zhao: Yes!