Cold paint jokes.

In fact, there are many more! You can pay attention to Sina Weibo's "Lengtu Lengduanzi". The following are purely examples, and there are many more! 1. My son is six years old this year. At noon, in order to put his son to sleep, he said to his son, "Son, let's play a game. I am an officer, you are a guard, and you have to listen to my orders. " My son is very happy because he likes playing games best. After playing for five minutes, I said to my son, "Guard, the chief now orders you to take off your clothes and go to bed." The son said unhappily, "I am a guard and should not sleep like a soldier." When I first entered junior high school, I got up the courage to confess to the girls in my favorite class. As a result, I tragically became the laughing stock of the public in the next three years. She said to everyone, "That guy really treated me ... hahaha ..." and she was laughed at for three years after high school. Until today, when having dinner at home, in front of her son, she always takes it out and says, "My wife is so diligent that I can't stand it!" " "What's the matter?" "I get up at five o'clock in the morning to drink some water. But when I got back to the house, she had folded the quilt and cooked. " My daughter went to boarding school and gave me a potted plant and tropical fish before she left. A week later, she called and I told her that the potted plant was dead. After a while, I regret to tell her that the tropical fish also died. She was silent for a while and asked, "What happened to dad?"

A woman saw a wooden bottle with many bamboo sticks in front of a street vendor. Thinking of her bad luck recently, the woman asked the stall owner, "How much is fortune telling?" The stall owner turned pale and said to the woman, "I sell chopsticks." 6. When I was a freshman, I had a math class and a buddy fell asleep. I was found halfway by the math teacher in senior three. The teacher came up to him and asked, "What's wrong with you, classmate?" The buddy immediately pretended to be ill and said, "Teacher, I feel a little dizzy ..." The teacher smiled and said, "Can you not be carried away by the high numbers in the English book?" 7. My daughter-in-law asked me yesterday, "If I fight with someone and the enemy sends you a beautiful woman against me, what will you do?" I quickly waved my fist to show my loyalty: "Be sure to let the enemy come back!" 8. The teacher talked about inertia in physics class. He asked, "A dog crossed the road, and a high-speed vehicle suddenly braked, and everyone in the car leaned forward. What is this phenomenon? " A classmate replied: "that's because people want to see if the dog has been killed, which is a phenomenon of watching."