Fortune Telling Collection - Comprehensive fortune-telling - Ask for some super funny jokes! No kidding, thank you!

Ask for some super funny jokes! No kidding, thank you!

China World Cup winning lineup: 4-4-2 Strikers: Guan Yu and Li Guang Reason: The former has the ability to go to meetings with one hand and make China a great town; The latter has the ability to beat Yang with a hundred paces. With these two men, it is not a piece of cake to score seven or eight goals in each game. The goal record in the final stage of the World Cup has been constantly refreshed. The Golden Boot Award, the Silver Boot Award, the World Footballer of the Year and the World Footballer of the Year were all contracted by these two people. Midcourt: Zhuge Liang, Sean, Wu Yong, Sun Wu Reason: These four people are well versed in the art of war, can attack, retreat and defend, have good scheduling, can see their opponents' weaknesses at a glance, can use different tactics according to the characteristics of the enemy, and then win the battle, and occasionally have a "sneak attack" and "empty city plan". It is very easy to win the game. Defender: The story of Shi, Wang Zhaojun and Diusim (commonly known as "four beauties") Reason: All four of them have the appearance of "sinking fish and falling geese" and all have the color of "hiding the bright moon". As the saying goes, "heroes are sad and beautiful." Whether it's Rona's ear, Baggio or Owen, do they meet such a defender? Come on, I still can't beat my heart faster, my feet are mixed with garlic, and my eyes are straight. How can I afford to play football? Goalkeeper: Turn off the sound. Reason: "A goalkeeper is equal to half a team." How many strong teams "turned victory into defeat" because of the goalkeeper's mistake, only hate their mother for missing two hands. And this man has thousands of hands, whether it's long-range, volley, penalty and set-pieces, all of them are confiscated. Buddy, Vieri, Bergkamp, etc. We are all very angry. Conclusion: With this lineup, the World Cup will belong to China team sooner or later.

China World Cup winning lineup: 4-4-2 Strikers: Guan Yu and Li Guang Reason: The former has the ability to go to meetings with one hand and make China a great town; The latter has the ability to beat Yang with a hundred paces. With these two men, it is not a piece of cake to score seven or eight goals in each game. The goal record in the final stage of the World Cup has been constantly refreshed. The Golden Boot Award, the Silver Boot Award, the World Footballer of the Year and the World Footballer of the Year were all contracted by these two people. Midcourt: Zhuge Liang, Sean, Wu Yong, Sun Wu Reason: These four people are well versed in the art of war, can attack, retreat and defend, have good scheduling, can see their opponents' weaknesses at a glance, can use different tactics according to the characteristics of the enemy, and then win the battle, and occasionally have a "sneak attack" and "empty city plan". It is very easy to win the game. Defender: The story of Shi, Wang Zhaojun and Diusim (commonly known as "four beauties") Reason: All four of them have the appearance of "sinking fish and falling geese" and all have the color of "hiding the bright moon". As the saying goes, "heroes are sad and beautiful." Whether it's Rona's ear, Baggio or Owen, do they meet such a defender? Come on, I still can't beat my heart faster, my feet are mixed with garlic, and my eyes are straight. How can I afford to play football? Goalkeeper: Turn off the sound. Reason: "A goalkeeper is equal to half a team." How many strong teams "turned victory into defeat" because of the goalkeeper's mistake, only hate their mother for missing two hands. And this man has thousands of hands, whether it's long-range, volley, penalty and set-pieces, all of them are confiscated. Buddy, Vieri, Bergkamp, etc. We are all very angry. Conclusion: With this lineup, the World Cup will belong to China team sooner or later.

Love syndrome: What is the cause of love syndrome? Regardless of gender, age, occupation, weight, education, appearance and blood type, it is still the biggest mystery. No one can be alone. Some experts and scholars believe it after research? Love is caused by endocrine disorders, but others think that love is a filter poison? Just like a cold, there is no cure, but it will heal automatically, whether you agree or not? Many examples from ancient times to the present prove that love is not just a disease? It may also be a kind of abnormal condition. Generally, the initial reaction after the onset will start with changing some living habits and washing your face particularly clean. I brushed my teeth very hard and suddenly got up to play the piano in the middle of the night. Some people stand on the balcony and giggle at passers-by every day. Some people suddenly go crazy? Suddenly it was quiet. Someone looks stupid? Folding mirrors, biting nails, sneezing, someone scolding the dog, and the woman suddenly changed her hair style? Men began to practice dumbbells every day. Loss of appetite, hysteria, limb atrophy, nervousness, trembling and cramps all appeared during this period, and their condition became more and more serious? People become particularly sensitive and disgusting, and they are as talented as talented poets in writing, speaking and singing? The more disgusting, the hungrier. This is very interesting. Someone hides in the toilet and cries every day after falling in love? Someone held a press conference to announce the news of love. Some people always like to hide in dark places. Like doing something ulterior, busy telling fortune every day? Want to change yourself? Cooperate with each other's habits and treat every day as an anniversary? Treat yourself as a souvenir and get bored with each other aimlessly every day? It's so interesting to say something meaningless. Walking, sitting and lying are inseparable? Like two people and three feet, like conjoined twins thought, only love you, love you, love you, no matter whether there is rice in the rice jar at home, no matter whether there are people protesting on the road? Just love, all you think about is love, love, love, love, love, love, love, regardless of cross-strait reunification or the number of refugees in Ethiopia. Just fell in love with you after a period of vigorous love? Will soon gradually begin to heal, two people began to get tired of each other? Attack each other's shortcomings? All the sweetness goes with the wind and then starts to wake up from fantasies and misunderstandings? Surprise yourself why you are so not smart and desperate for love? Regardless of parents, friends, sisters and brothers? I began to regret it, and then I began to feel tired, sluggish, wheezing, flustered, toothache, headache, dreamy dreams, and then my mood was low, my pupils were dilated, my temper was bad, and I was quadriplegic? Finally, I can't stand to be separated, although the result is quite sad? It's no big deal to know. Love is a cloud that can't be caught after all. I just want to tell you, oh ... in my lonely years? Your gentle release of my loneliness brings me deep ecstasy? So trembling that my heart whispers love, love, love, love, love? Whether it's night or dawn, whether it's dream or wake up. How happy am I to love you deeply? Let me meet you. Oh ...

Chatting with a smile, Tutu said, "My mother calls me Tutu, which is nice!" The pig said, "My mother calls me a pig, which is nice!" " "The dog said," My mother called me a puppy, which is also very nice! "The chicken said," You talk, I'll go first! " The rabbit said, "I am a son of a bitch rabbit!" " ! "The pig said," I'm a son of a bitch! " The chicken said, "I'm a son of a bitch!" "The dog said," You talk, I'll go first! " "No.0 sparring partner said," outsiders call me zero sparring partner, nice! "1 sparring partner said," It's good to have an outsider! " No.2 sparring partner said, "It's good for outsiders to call me Second Escort! "No.3 sparring partner said," You talk, let's go first! " The cat said to me, "I'm your grandmother's cat. It's beautiful! "The dog said to me," I'm your grandmother's dog. It sounds nice! " "The fish said to me," I'm your grandmother's fish. It sounds nice! "The bear said," You talk, I'll go first! " Lang Ke said: "People call me a ronin, which is very nice!" ! "The samurai said," It's nice that people call me a samurai! "The expert said," It's nice to be called an expert! The swordsman said, "You talk, I'll go first." Jane Zhang said: "My fans say my idol is Ying." He Jie said, "My fans say my idol is Jay." Said, "My fans say my idol is Chang." Chris Lee said, "you talk, I walked first. The senior math teacher said that I teach senior math this semester, and the college physics teacher said that I teach senior math this semester. Peking University said: I am from Peking University. Tianjin University said: I am older. Shanghai University said: I went to college. Xiamen University said: You talk, I'll go first! General Li Zongren said: I am a benevolent man! General fu said to him: I am just! General Zuo Quan said: I have this right! General Huo Qubing said: You talk, I'll go first. Minolta users say: we are beautiful women! Canon users say: we are beautiful! The user of Huaguang said: We are from China! Nikon users said: you chat, I'll go first. The door of Lao Zhang's house is made of wicker. Lao Zhang said: Lao Li's door is made of plastic. Lao Li said: the door of Lao Wang's house is made of brick. Lao Wang said: The door of Lao Liu's house is made of steel. Lao Liu said: you talk, I'll go first! Bai Yu said: My name is White. Jade jade said, my name is jasper. Redjade said, My name is Redjade. Xing Yu said: You talk, I'll go first! Teachers' College students said: I am a student of Railway Institute. Teachers' College students said: I am a student of Vocational College of Iron Institute. I am a student of Technical College of Vocational College. You can talk. I'll go first!