Do you think falling in love means eating, shopping and watching movies?

Xiaoxue and her husband met by playing games, just like "meeting the best you at the best age". Being madly in love for a year is also very sweet, so she will get married soon before she turns 25. This can almost be regarded as a living teaching material for some parents to say that "other people get married early, so don't take the leftover girl route to make people worry".

And her married life has gradually faded out of the sight of those uncles and aunts who praised her: it's good to get married, and when the task is completed, we will wait for the full moon wine.

But in fact, it is not so easy for uncles and aunts to drink this full moon wine. After the marriage, Xiaoxue and her husband were very anxious.

Xiaoxue wants to master the power of family finance, but her husband refuses to give it to her, saying that Xiaoxue only knows how to buy shoes and bags, and can't manage family finance at all to realize the appreciation of family property. But Xiaoxue is also the mistress of a family after marriage. Knowing that she has to plan her life, she has to consider more than when she was a girl at home. Of course, she has to plan insurance protection, children's education fund and so on for the whole family. However, my husband doesn't care about this. He spends money and doesn't let the snow tube. What makes Xiaoxue crazy is that her husband said that she wants an education fund. He doesn't want children!

Xiaoxue suddenly felt that there was no darkness at home, but dreamed of husband and wife life since childhood! Moreover, the two are now in a stalemate. As soon as she talked to her husband about these questions, he avoided answering them. Xiaoxue hates his style, but he can't help it.

I just want to ask, before you got married, didn't you know that your husband didn't agree with your financial management, that he didn't want children, and that his husband avoided questions? !

"-I don't know."

I don't know, so you dare to get married? !

"-at that time, I felt that this person must be right. Being in love for more than a year is good for me. "

So what did you do that year?

"-I often date, eat, go shopping and watch movies, and then I go back to my home."

Then how did you make an appointment and decide to get married?

"-they have been in love for a year, and the time should be almost the same."

I don't know what to say.

(2)

There are many snowmen. Before placing an order, Taobao may ask the customer service lady about the materials and postage. Speaking of lunch, we want to see the food/price/service in this restaurant, but in front of marriage, it is surprisingly hasty.

Girl, marriage is not a ceremony to be completed at that time/age. This is the most important choice in your life. This choice will affect the rest of your life (and perhaps your descendants). How can you be careless and cautious?

First of all, you should know that marriage is not a date, not that I think you are pleasing to the eye, not that you think I am comfortable, not that two people go out to chat at high altitude together and then go back to their home happily to find their mother. Marriage is to form a new family with another person for the rest of your life, so before you get married, you need to know whether this person's temper is congenial to you (modern society can't live without it, unlike most marriages in ancient times, which were purely for the purpose of carrying on the family line) and the following points:

1, TA's three views (how does he view the world, whether he believes in Buddhism or works hard by himself, what he thinks is meaningful and valuable, and what kind of life he thinks people should live)

People with different views are the disaster of each other under any circumstances, so stay away as soon as possible to avoid hurting each other/hindering each other/wasting time. Entering marriage is a tragedy.

2.TA's overall life goals/plans (medium-term/long-term, macro/micro)

For example, if people want to get rich and emigrate in the future, you are going to live with your parents and their hometown, preferably friends/acquaintances.

3. TA's plans for the future family (whether to get married or not, whether to dink, family financial planning, pension planning, place of residence, etc.). )

If TA insists on not having children, but you must be a parent, please worship as early as possible. If the relationship is good, let the children recognize michel platini dopted mother in the future.

4. What problem-solving mechanism did you and TA form (or can form)?

An intimate boat can't sail in a calm ocean all the time. How did you solve the problem, the cold war or communication? Whether you have formed a reaction mechanism to face the problem determines that you will capsize sooner or later.

Xiaoxue couldn't answer these questions before marriage because they never talked about these topics before marriage. She thinks her boyfriend's advantage is that he is considerate and interesting when dating. Then she got married bravely. After getting married, she can answer, but most of the answers don't go with her. At this time, she missed the opportunity and it was too late to regret it!

When did you say you would discuss these issues? Of course it's time to fall in love! Otherwise, do you think that falling in love means eating, shopping and watching movies?

It's so corny, even if you eat, go shopping or watch movies, you should keep this list in mind. You have problems eating, shopping and watching movies! Of course, you don't need to bring a list of questions, so make an appointment to meet in a sunny afternoon cafe in TA. You can ask questions one by one and let TA answer them. On a sunny afternoon, you can enjoy flowers and go boating. When you see a fake beggar on the road, you can have a chat and find a little bit of TA's values. When you see Xiong Haizi making trouble, ask him what he thinks, and you can find a little bit of TA's view on family education. ...

Don't just go after dinner or shopping, that is, simply enjoy the food and have an eye addiction, which you and your best friend can enjoy together. Don't waste the opportunity of dating!

(3)

The exploration of the above questions is accumulated in the usual dating, provided that you consciously explore all aspects of this person. Until one day, you found an unacceptable trait in this person (for example, he doesn't want children, you must be a mother, for example, he thinks that life should be full of surplus food, and you should eat, drink and be merry). Well, you can go over it, and it's best to get together and leave, and then, next, please.

However, if this day does not appear until you know almost everything you need to know, congratulations, you may have gained a good life partner.

Another girl may say that such a date is so impure, always observing each other, so insincere. Please, this is the greatest sincerity of dating. You are evaluating each other's potential to be your life partner!

It's like you want to bid, and the companies that come to bid have carefully prepared their bids and handed them in. You don't read other people's bids carefully, but only arrange a dinner for them. After eating, I don't think about the pros and cons of each family. This is the most insincere tenderness.

Finding a life partner is like a business tender. You want to know what you want and then choose what you want. This is what you have to do in the love stage.