Fortune-telling funny copy _ fortune-telling funny copy phrase

I don't like superstition. When I was a child, my fortune teller said that I could be admitted to Tsinghua when I grew up. I proved that this is unscientific with practical actions!

2. My friend was lovelorn the other day. Under my guidance, he finally got through it and jumped directly from the balcony ... 3. The fly saw the mosquito in a hurry and asked, "Where are you going?" Mosquito replied: "Go donate blood, Kidd can live a long life." The fly said, "Is it true? I will go with you, too. " Mosquito kindly reminded the fly: "Forget it, your blood is definitely unqualified."

4. Getting fat is all quietly. Quietly, you think everything is as usual, and it is a surprise to find the pants in previous years.

5. I wanted to take a bite, but I ate it all night; I wanted to go for a happy run, but I met a barbecue.

6. In addition to being sentimental in the middle of the night, there are also cell phones that smash your face.

7. Everyone said, "I don't know what I'm doing, but I'm going deeper." I think I'm probably the only one who "doesn't know where the money is and is broke."

8. What kind of mentality is it to return to Ant Flower every month? I especially hate the injustice of fate. I bought something I like last month, but it was obviously me last month. Why do you want to return it this month?

9. As long as the courier is still on the road, I think there is still hope in my life. As long as there is takeout on the road, everything is exciting!

10. Wine has a temper, and the so-called spirit is wine with a big temper. If you want to drink it, it won't make you successful. The more you drink, the angrier you get, and finally, wow, it comes out of your stomach.

1 1. Walking at night, my wallet was robbed. I begged the robber to give me my driver's license back, but he ignored me. I suddenly got angry and shouted at him: no unit or individual can detain this card except the public security traffic management organ!

12. My girlfriend told me that when we are together, we need to help each other. You help me cook, and I'll check the dishes for you.

13. Women like to talk about which pot is not open. Today, I was so poor that I didn't even have money to refuel my car, but she comforted me: "Come on!" " "

14. Me: "People say that playing games is to relax. When is the most relaxing time for you to play games? " Colleague: "When the system is maintained."

15. Boss: You don't have to come to work after the Chinese New Year! Employee: Why? Boss: You disobey management! Employee: I obey! Boss: Then you are fired. staff ...

16. quantitative change leads to qualitative change. For example, Ma Yun was just Ma Yun, but when his wealth accumulated to a certain extent, he suddenly became ... the father of many people.

17. When summer came, once my son asked me to take him swimming, I was embarrassed to say, "I can't swim." The son was very angry and said, "How can Xiao Ming's father?" He always eats fish, so he can swim. The son pouted and said, "But you always eat chicken, can you lay eggs?"

18. I had a big fight with my husband! Husband: Look at you. Your face is red with anger! I thought he had a conscience and wanted to apologize, so I heard him say, what an ungrateful look! I will ... I will fight you!

19. Go to work in the morning. As soon as I opened the car door, I saw a note written by my wife: "Be sure to refuel!" I drew a heart beside it, and I was moved at that time. I swear silently in my heart: "Wife, I will definitely work hard to make money and let you live a good life." 15 minutes later, on the expressway, my car was towed to the service area because it was out of gas.

20. Today, I said to my husband: Honey, I hate long hair. I want to have my hair cut short. What did you say?/Sorry? My husband answered me quickly: no, I didn't know I married a woman until I saw your long hair.