Chaoshan fortune-telling grandmother _ who is Chaoshan fortune-telling grandmother?

The vulgar appellation of relatives in Chaoshan and Hakka customs should be changed.

As a Hakka who grew up in Chaoshan area, I feel uncomfortable with some traditional kinship terms, especially for Hakka and Chaoshan people!

Big sister went to her brother-in-law's house for the first time after marriage. When I first met my brother-in-law's parents, I thought it was more reasonable and accurate to call them uncles and aunts (in addition, "uncles and aunts" have the custom of replacing "parents" in Hakka and Chaoshan cultures). As a result, my sister corrected me as soon as she heard it. I want to call my brother-in-law's parents, that is, "grandparents", by her and her children.

Later, I learned that when a husband and wife address each other's relatives, they should follow the seniority of their children (that is, they should be called "children's titles"). For example, if a husband calls his wife uncle, he should call him uncle (Chaoshan calls him uncle) and so on. This common phenomenon of calling brothers, sisters, parents, family members or relatives and in-laws needs to be reduced by one generation, which made me feel uncomfortable from the beginning and worried me! However, because I have lived in a big city for a long time, far away from my hometown and customs in those places, the stimulation of this traditional address custom has gradually faded from my mind.

It was not until my own brother got married recently that my sister-in-law's parents came to visit. However, this time I still think it is more reasonable to call my sister-in-law's parents uncles and aunts. When my sister-in-law's parents came back from the guests, my mother pointed out that I should call my sister-in-law's parents "grandparents", which aroused my doubts and discomfort about this vulgar name before, so that I actually quarreled with my family.

Why is it called this? Why can't we call it by actual qualifications? Is this traditional title really reasonable? How long ago was this handed down?

In the past, in order to cater to the so-called three cardinal guides and five permanents, the old society respected the old and loved the young, especially the clan society emphasized seniority, so it got such a title! However, now is the era of freedom and democracy, and the cultural spirit emphasizes equality for all, including equality of all ages and equality between men and women. When a generation demotes the title of "subordinate", it is to sacrifice the self-esteem of the younger generation in exchange for excessive respect for the elders. Such stereotypes have no positive significance. Therefore, I strongly suggest that the reform should be changed to "husband/wife title" according to actual seniority, so as to keep up with the development of the times.

Moderns's progressive trend, all unreasonable so-called "traditional" obstacles should be pushed away!