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After two years of marriage, my husband and I discussed bringing my mother-in-law from the countryside to spend her old age safely. Mr. Wang's father died when he was very young. He was the only sustenance of his mother-in-law, who raised him by herself and put him through college. It is absolutely not an exaggeration to use the word' put up with hardships' on her mother-in-law! I promised again and again that I would immediately clean up a room with a balcony facing south, let my mother-in-law bask in the sun and raise flowers and plants. Mr. Wang stood in a sunny room without saying a word, but suddenly he picked me up and walked around the room. When I bared my teeth and begged for mercy, Mr. Wang said,' Take my mother away.' Mr. Wang is tall, and I like to stick to his chest. I feel that my petite body can be grabbed by him and stuffed into my pocket at any time. When my husband and I had an argument and refused to give in, he lifted me up and staggered on my head until I was scared to beg for mercy. This frightened happiness fascinates me. The habits of rural mother-in-law can't be changed for a while. I bought a bunch of flowers in the living room before, but later my mother-in-law couldn't help it:' You dolls don't know life, so why buy flowers? Can't be eaten as a meal! I smiled and said,' Mom, if there are blooming flowers at home, people's mood will be better.' Mother-in-law muttered with her head down, and her husband laughed:' Mom, this is the habit of city people. Slowly, you will get used to it. My mother-in-law stopped saying anything, but she couldn't help asking how much it cost every time she bought flowers. He smacked his lips when I said it. Sometimes, when she sees me buying big bags of things to go home, she asks how much this is and how much that is. When I answered truthfully, her mouth smacked even louder. Mr. Wang twisted my nose and said,' Little fool, won't you just tell her the real price?' The happy life is gradually disharmony. My mother-in-law hates my husband getting up to make breakfast. In her opinion, how can a big man cook for his wife? At the breakfast table, my mother-in-law's face is often gloomy, so I pretend not to see it. Mother-in-law's tinkling chopsticks are her silent protest. I'm a dance teacher in the Children's Palace, and I'm tired of jumping around. I don't want to lose this unique enjoyment in the warm bed in the morning, so I turned a deaf ear to my mother-in-law's protest. My mother-in-law likes to help me with some housework, and I am busier when she does it. For example, she collected all the garbage bags and said that when she saved enough to sell waste plastics, there were waste plastic bags everywhere in her house; She couldn't bear to wash the dishes with detergent, so I had to do it again secretly in order not to hurt her self-esteem. Once, my mother-in-law saw me secretly washing dishes at night. She slammed the door and cried in the room. Mr. Wang is in a dilemma. Afterwards, Mr. Wang didn't talk to me all night. I spoiled, I cheated, and he ignored me

I got angry and asked him,' What did I do wrong?' Mr. Wang glared at me and said,' Can't you give in? If the bowl is not clean, it won't kill you, will it? Later, for a long time, my mother-in-law didn't talk to me, and the atmosphere at home began to become awkward. In those days, my husband was very tired and didn't know who to tease first. In order not to let her son cook breakfast, the mother-in-law took on the' heavy responsibility' of cooking breakfast without hesitation. My mother-in-law watched my husband eat happily, then looked at me and condemned me for not doing my duty as a wife with her eyes. In order to avoid embarrassment, I had to buy a bag of milk to commit suicide on my way to work. When I was sleeping, my husband asked me a little angrily,' Reed, don't you dislike my mother's dirty cooking and not eating at home?' Turning over, he threw me a cold back and made me cry. Finally, the gentleman sighed:' Reid, can you have breakfast at home just for me? I had to go back to the awkward breakfast table. That morning, I drank the porridge cooked by my mother-in-law and suddenly felt queasy. Everything in my stomach rushed out. I tried to keep them from coming up, but I didn't hold them down. I threw down the bowl and rushed into the bathroom to throw up. When I gasped to calm down, I saw my mother-in-law complaining and crying in her hometown dialect. My husband stood at the door of the bathroom and looked at me angrily. I can't speak with my mouth open. I really didn't mean to. My husband and I had a heated argument for the first time. My mother-in-law glared at us first, then got up and limped out. My husband gave me a bitter look and went downstairs to chase my mother-in-law. Accidentally ushered in a new life, but suddenly ruined her mother-in-law's life! For three days, Mr. Wang didn't go home, not even a phone. I am upright. I think I have wronged myself enough since my mother-in-law came. What else do you want from me? Somehow, I always want to throw up, I have no appetite for anything, and things at home are in a mess, so I feel extremely bad. Later, my colleague said,' Reid, you look pale. You'd better go to the hospital. The result of the hospital examination is that I am pregnant. I understand why I suddenly vomited that morning, with a hint of bitterness in my happiness: why didn't my husband and my experienced mother-in-law think of this at all? At the gate of the hospital, I saw Mr. After only three days away, he was much haggard. I want to turn and leave, but his appearance makes me feel distressed, and I can't help it. I called him. My husband followed the sound and saw me, but he didn't seem to know me. There was a trace of disgust in his eyes, and they gave me a cold stab. I told myself not to look at him. I reached out and stopped a taxi. At that time, I wanted to shout to my husband:' Dear, I will give birth to a baby for you!' Then he lifted it and spun it happily. What I hoped did not happen. In the taxi, my tears slowly fell. Why do quarrels make love so bad? When I got home, I lay in bed thinking about my husband and his eyeful of disgust. I cried with a corner of the quilt in my arms. There is the sound of rummaging through drawers at home at night. Turning on the light, I saw my husband's tearful face. He is taking money. I looked at him coldly and said nothing. He turned a blind eye to me and left in a hurry with his passbook and money. Maybe Mr. Wang will leave me completely. What a rational person! Love and money are so clearly divided. I sneered a few times, and tears came crashing down. The next day, I didn't go to work. I wanted to clear my mind completely and talk with my husband. When I found Mr. Wang's company, the secretary looked at me strangely and said,' Mr. Chen's mother had a car accident and was in the hospital. I was dumbfounded. I flew to the hospital and found my husband when my mother-in-law had already left. Mr. Wang never looked at me, and his expression was stiff. I looked at my mother-in-law's thin and pale face, and my tears could not stop: Oh, my God! How did this happen? My husband didn't say a word to me until my mother-in-law was buried, and even looked at me with deep disgust. About the car accident, I still learned from others that my mother-in-law walked to the station in a daze after going out. She wants to go back to her hometown. The more she chased, the faster she walked. When crossing the road, a bus collided head-on ... I finally understood my husband's disgust. If I hadn't vomited that morning, if we hadn't quarreled, if ... in his heart, I was the sinner who indirectly killed his mother. Mr. Wang moved into her mother-in-law's room silently and came back with the smell of wine every night. And I have been overwhelmed by guilt and poor self-esteem, trying to explain to him and tell him that we are going to have a baby soon, but looking at his cold eyes, I swallowed everything back. I would rather my husband beat me or scold me, although these accidents were not my intention. The days are suffocating, repeating day by day, and the time for my husband to go home is getting later and later. We are deadlocked, more embarrassed than strangers. I am a knot tied to his heart. Once, I passed a western restaurant and went through a transparent French window. I saw my husband sitting face to face with a young girl. He brushed her hair lightly and I understood everything. First I stayed, then I went into the western restaurant and stood in front of my husband, staring at him intensely, without a tear in my eyes. I don't want to say anything and I have nothing to say. The girl looked at me, looked at my husband and stood up to leave. My husband stretched out his hand and held her down, and then he looked at me with the same firm eyes and never showed weakness. I can only hear my slow heartbeat, beating on the dying pale edge. I'm the loser. If I stand still, I will fall with the baby in my belly. That night, my husband didn't come home. In this way, he made me understand that with the death of my mother-in-law, our love also passed away. Mr. Wang never comes back. Sometimes, when I come back from work, I see that the wardrobe is passive-my husband comes back to get his own things. I don't want to call him. I tried to explain to him that everything was completely gone. I live alone and go to the hospital for a physical examination. Every time I see a man holding his wife carefully for a physical examination, my heart breaks. Colleagues vaguely advised me to abort, and I said no, I was crazy to give birth to this child, which is also compensation for my mother-in-law's death. My husband was sitting in the living room when I came back from work. The room is full of smoke, and there is a piece of paper on the coffee table. There's no need to look. I know what it says. Mr. Wang walked for more than two months, and I gradually learned to be calm. I looked at him, took off my hat and said,' Wait a minute, I'll sign it. Mr. Wang looked at me with complicated eyes, just like me. I unbuttoned my coat and said to myself,' Don't cry, don't cry …' My eyes hurt, but I didn't make them cry. Hang up my coat, and my husband's eyes are fixed on my bulging belly. I smiled, walked over, dragged the paper, signed my name, and pushed it to him without looking. "Reed, are you pregnant?" This is the first time my husband has spoken to me since my mother-in-law's accident. I can't hold my eyes any longer, and tears are pouring down. I said,' Yes, but it doesn't matter. You can go now. Mr. Wang did not leave. We looked at each other in the dark. Mr. Wang lay on me slowly, and tears penetrated the quilt. In my heart, many things are so far away that I can't get there even if I run. I can't remember how many times Mr. Wang told me' I'm sorry'. I thought I would forgive, but I can't. In front of the girl in the western restaurant, Mr. Wang looked at me coldly, which I will never forget. We carved deep scars on each other's hearts. Mine is unintentional; He did it on purpose. Look forward to the past and let it go, but the past can't come back! I feel warm at the thought of the baby in my belly, but my heart is as cold as frost for my husband. I don't eat anything he buys, I don't want any gifts he sends, and I don't talk to him. From the moment I signed that paper, marriage and love died in my heart. Sometimes my husband wants to go back to the bedroom. When he comes, I will go to the living room, and my husband has to go back to her mother-in-law's room to sleep. At night, sometimes there will be a slight groan from my husband's room, and I am silent. This is his usual trick. In the past, as long as I ignored him, he pretended to be sick, and I surrendered and cared about what happened to him. He grabbed me and smiled. He forgot that at that time, I was distressed by love. Now, what do we have? Mr. Wang groaned intermittently until the baby was born. He buys things for his children almost every day, such as baby products, children's products, and books that children like. Bags soon fill his room. I know he touched me so much, and I am unmoved. He had to shut up in his room and type on the computer. Maybe he is online dating, but it doesn't matter to me anymore. One night in the late spring of the following year, the severe abdominal pain made me scream, and my husband rushed in as if he hadn't undressed at all, just waiting for this moment. My husband picked me up and ran downstairs, stopped the car, held my hand tightly all the way, and kept wiping the sweat on his forehead. When I got to the hospital, I picked it up and ran to the obstetrics department. Lying on his thin and warm back, an idea suddenly broke into Xi: Who will love me like him in this life? Mr. Wang held the delivery room door and watched me go in. I smiled at him with warm eyes and pain. When I came out of the delivery room, my husband looked at me and my son, smiling and his eyes were wet. I touched his hand. Mr. Wang looked at me, smiled, and then fell down slowly and wearily. I called his name in pain ... Mr. Wang smiled and didn't open his tired eyes ... I thought I would never cry for Mr. Wang again, but the truth is, I have never torn my body with such severe pain. The doctor said that when my husband's liver cancer was discovered, it was absolutely a miracle that he could persist for so long. I asked the doctor when it was discovered. The doctor said it five months ago and comforted me:' Prepare for the funeral. Despite the nurse's obstruction, I went home, rushed into my husband's room and turned on the computer, and my heart was suddenly suffocated by pain. Mr. Wang's liver cancer was discovered five months ago, and his moaning is true. I really thought ... 200,000 words on the computer were a sentence written by Mr. Wang to his son: Son, I have been insisting for you, and now my greatest wish is to wait until I see you before falling down ... I know there will be a lot of happiness or setbacks in your life. If I can accompany you through this growth process, how happy it would be. Dad, on the computer, write down the problems you may encounter in your life one by one When you encounter these problems, you can refer to your father's advice. ...

Son, after writing these more than 200,000 words, I feel that I have accompanied you through the whole growth process. Really, dad is very happy. Love your mother. She works hard. She is the person who loves you the most, and she is also my favorite person ... from her son's kindergarten to primary school, middle school, university, to work and love, everything is written in detail. My husband also wrote me a letter: Dear, marrying you is the greatest happiness in my life. Forgive me for hurting you and hiding my illness, because I want you to have a good mood to wait for the birth of the child ... honey, if you cry, it means you have forgiven me, so I smiled. Thank you for always loving me ... I'm afraid I won't have a chance to give these gifts to my children in person. Please send him several copies for me every year. I brought my son over and put him next to me. I said,' Open your eyes and smile, I want my son to remember his warmth in your arms …' Mr. Wang struggled to open his eyes and smiled. The son nestled in his arms, waving pink hands. I pressed the shutter and tears flowed freely on my face. ...