1000 humorous jokes (15 humorous jokes)

1. Humorous joke On the wedding day, I took a family photo, but my father avoided taking it. My mother said, alas, your father is so promising and reluctant to take a family photo! So I went to menstruation's house to find my dad with tears in my eyes, and secretly saw my dad kneeling in front of my grandmother's photo and muttering: Married!

Second, humorous jokes When walking, the son asked: "Mom, are you a humorous person?" Me: "I think so!" At this time, the husband who walked in front threw a fart! "You refuse to accept?" I asked. Husband: "I'm giving you a theory!" " "

My girlfriend bought me a baked sweet potato in the street. I asked her, "If I am as worthless as the sweet potato seller in the future, will you still stay with me?" She replied faintly: "It is my ex-boyfriend who sells sweet potatoes."

Fourth, humorous jokes and girlfriends took a taxi together and were hacked by the driver. Tickets for less than 10 yuan must be 20 yuan. I was about to argue with the driver when my best friend gave me money. After getting off the bus, I said, why don't you make it clear to the driver? thank you My best friend said: My 20 yuan is fake money, and I have been waiting for this day for a long time. ...

5. Humorous jokes I went to eat a revolving hot pot and found that it had become a string. I asked the boss why he changed it. The boss said: 35 people couldn't finish it before. Some guests ate seven or eight cans of beer, several plates of mutton rolls and then ate meatballs, alas! I can't hold on! I am in a hurry: but you can't change it. I come to eat after work every day, but I'm an old customer. Did you get my permission? Never come again! The moment I turned around, I heard the clerk mutter, boss, is this fat sister the one you said you would eat 100 at least once?

6. Humorous jokes help the boss drive. The proprietress sat in the back row and scolded the co-pilot boss. He has been silent, banging on a bottle of mineral water with his hand. With the boss's violent temper in the company, he will start work at any time. He is forbearing, holding the water bottle tightly in his arms! The proprietress talked for nearly ten minutes, spouting insulting words. I glanced at my boss, who took out mineral water in one hand, braked quickly and tilted his head to one side. The boss turned his head: Wife, are you thirsty? Take a sip of water when you are tired, knowing that you can't drink cold water today, I will warm you up!

The woman went into the knitting shop. I went to the nearby public toilet and came out to find my daughter-in-law. I found that she picked out some pairs of socks and was paying the bill. The shopkeeper said: a ***46 yuan, my daughter-in-law took out 100 yuan-two 50 yuan bills and handed them over. The shopkeeper was stupefied: Why did you give me two 50 s? Daughter-in-law: I dare not give you the bill of 100. If you don't have 50, give it to me That's good. You don't have me. My face turned red after hearing this, and I quickly slipped away before my daughter-in-law saw it.

I quarreled with my wife tonight. My wife was so angry that she said loudly that I didn't sleep next to you in the pigsty. I slept until midnight when I suddenly felt someone squeezing into my cup. I was scared and kicked it out. I didn't realize it was wrong until I heard "ouch". I was surprised when I turned on the light. Didn't you sleep in a pigsty? I only heard her whisper, and the smell was so unique that I really couldn't sleep! Oh ... it was boring at first, but now it's gone?

I've been practicing yoga for two days, and I pulled my leg and walked with a limp. On my way home from work today, I met two handsome guys selling products. One of them wanted to come up and recommend me, and another handsome guy grabbed him. I was a little confused, and then I walked on, and I heard that handsome guy say, don't lie to the disabled!

Ten, humorous jokes and husband lying in bed playing with mobile phones, while watching jokes, the mobile phone is charging. After a long time, my husband suddenly turned his head and said, daughter-in-law, you can't charge while playing with your mobile phone. There is a lot of radiation. Seeing that my husband cares so much, he resolutely unplugged the charger, and then … he silently connected the charger to the mobile phone!

Eleven, humorous joke Xiaoming is very buttoned, never had a girlfriend, today finally, he took his sister to dinner. Arriving at the hotel, Xiaoming: Waiter, a cucumber slice, cold preserved eggs, hot pot stewed potatoes, another hot pot potato, and finally a bottle of 82-year-old coke. Attendant: ok, boss, your food will be served right away, but we don't have 82 coke in our store. Xiaoming: What was there in' 82? Attendant: Our boss's wife is from 1982.

12. Humorous jokes I drank wine last night. When I got up this morning, my head was still dizzy. I'm going to go to work by bike in the yard. When I found the car missing, I called my wife: "I can't find the car. Did you ride away? " The wife cursed: "You still have the face to ask. Last night, you drank until midnight, rode back on a big branch and stood on the wall respectfully. " I ...

13. When we were eating this morning, I heard a couple next door yelling. The woman said, "Stop, it's raining so hard outside. Are you still going? " The man said, "Wife, in order not to let you suffer with me all the time, I'll go even if I go to hell." Damn, what a touching scene! So I ran out and asked the woman, "What is your husband doing in such a heavy rain?" Then she said grumpily, "Buy lottery tickets."

Last Valentine's Day, the five of us agreed to be single this year. If anyone finds a boyfriend, let her boyfriend pay for everyone to go out for a big day! On Valentine's Day this year, I scampered among my girlfriends early in the morning and told them about last year's agreement, because they all had boyfriends and I was the only one. Then, they collectively quit the group. ...

Fifteen, humorous jokes have a small hair. When she was born, her grandfather found her a prestigious host to meet her. The master said, "The child is expensive because he has the spirit of an emperor. He wandered in luxury stores, flags and shouts, drifting with the tide! " His family is so happy! How time flies! We are all grown up! Later, I called her to ask how she is now, and she said that she is a tour guide now!