What are the ten jokes that hurt your stomach?

0 1 1 Once Xiao Ming came home from school and said to his mother, "Mom, I am the strongest in our class, and I will definitely become a strongman in the future." Mother said, "How can you be so sure? Where did you get the confidence? " Xiao Ming said, "The teacher gave it to me! Our head teacher always said that I was dragging our class down by myself! " 2. Go shopping with my mother and sit outside waiting for her to try on clothes. When I see a little boy waiting for my mother like me, I will chat with him. I said, "You are waiting for your mother, too! We are so poor. " The little boy said, "I'm not poor." I'm not like you. I want to leave. " I just smiled and didn't speak. Then, the little boy suddenly shouted, "Mom, there is a strange aunt here. She wants to take me away." Xiaoming's mother and I are making a mask. At this moment, the doorbell rang, and Xiao Ming's mother was inconvenient, so she called Xiao Ming, "Go and open the door, I can't see anyone now." Then Xiao Ming hurried to open the door. Looks like dad. As soon as Dad came in, he asked Xiao Ming, "Where's your mother? Not at home? " Xiao Ming said, "My mother is doing a shameful thing." 4. Climb the mountain with friends, watch the sunrise, reach the top of the mountain and wait for a while. I said, "I saw it." A friend of mine also pointed to the sky and said, "I saw it, too." At this time, a man in the distance came out with trousers and scolded, "I see it when I see it." What are you shouting? " The doctor asked the patient how he broke his bone. The patient said, "I walked on the road today and felt there was sand in my shoes, so I took off my shoes and shook them with a pole." A man thought I was electrocuted, so he grabbed a stick and gave me two. 6. A sausage was locked in the refrigerator and felt very cold. Then I looked at the other one next to me and said with a little comfort, "Look at you, frozen like this, you are covered with ice!" " As a result, Root said, "Sorry, I'm a popsicle." 7. An idiot friend came to my house to play, and I bought him Sprite. He took it and put it on the coffee table, and accidentally knocked it over. Sprite spilled, and the idiot turned green. Knocked over my desk, grabbed my collar and said, "Is this fucking water poisonous?" 8. Go to the hospital and ask an expert if there is any way to lose weight without dieting or exercising. Experts say there is. I asked eagerly what it was. He said it was garlic. I thought it was wrong at first, but then I thought about it. That makes sense. Garlic can burn fat and promote metabolism. Experts say garlic can keep others away from you. The farther away, the smaller it looks. 9. A friend of mine told a fortune last year that he was doomed to be lucky this year and would be deeply hurt by a woman who suddenly appeared. Yesterday, he was hit by an aunt riding an electric car at the corner, and he is still lying in the hospital. 10, I ate watermelon for the first time when I was a child, and then I stopped spitting watermelon seeds. Then my mother told me that if you eat watermelon without spitting watermelon seeds, watermelon seedlings will grow in your stomach. I don't believe it. Then the next day, my stomach hurt. I thought it was watermelon seeds sprouting in my stomach, which scared me to find my mother. Mom found me some medicine and said that all she had to do was pull it out. Then I squatted in the toilet that day and didn't come out. But I still haven't pulled out watermelon seedlings.