Inventory of network classic teasing quotations

In daily study, work or life, everyone will inevitably come into contact with quotations, which are usually used to explain someone's spoken sentences and language characteristics in a period of time. So what types of quotations are there? The following is an inventory of the classic online ridicule quotations I compiled, hoping to help everyone.

1 1 I'd rather have an enemy like God than a friend like a dog.

2, don't give elder brother discharge, sister-in-law there is caller ID!

3. One worships heaven and earth, the other worships Gaotang and worships himself. Good-send it to the examination room. ...

Sometimes it is more difficult for you to get through a person's phone than to get through Ren Du's second pulse.

After breaking up, I don't expect anything. I just hope that every woman in your future is not as good as one. ...

6. Don't blame my brother for being crazy, just because the world is too arrogant.

7. I have done two things wrong in my life, one is to live and the other is to live.

8. Don't say that the wolf didn't eat mutton in 2008. Since 2008, neither cats nor mice have eaten mice.

9. Brother Green Arrow and Brother Huang Arrow were walking when they suddenly saw Yi Damei. As a result, Sister Pigeon chewed them up and gave birth to Xuanmai.

10 Whenever I cry for you, you always smile mercilessly at my side.

1 1, at night without orangutans, I attract you with monkeys.

12, I used a little trick to double my chances of winning the lottery-buy two lottery tickets!

13, men's brains like women's hearts, but their eyes like women's looks.

14, women should be domineering and say: I am a man, who am I afraid of?

15, if you are sad enough, stand up by yourself. Others will get sick if they watch too much.

16, we are not afraid of teachers, but we are afraid that teachers will call their parents.

17, it used to be beautiful, but now it's getting ugly. Colleagues said faintly: Now the pixels are getting higher and higher.

18, I'm not a fortune teller on the overpass, so I can't say so many things you like to hear.

19, the tragedy of life is that when you want to do anything, you only have a knife.

20. The person who holds you in the palm of his hand will crush you to death at the foot of Wuxing Mountain one day.

2 1, suddenly turned around, and the man next to him stood at the stairs with soy milk.

22, I am three noes: no heart, no lungs, no courage.

23. Since time cannot go back, why can't we work hard for the future ~

24. There is no future without tomorrow and the day after tomorrow.

25. You told me to get out, and I got out. You asked me to come back. I'm sorry. I'm leaving.

26, military training, heatstroke, people fall, buy medicine, out of stock. I smiled.

I hate people who are hot and cold to me. Do you think of me because no one is with you?

28. There is no rehearsal in life, and every day is live broadcast; Not only the ratings are low, but also the salary is not high.

29. I'm going to get a haircut. I twisted my neck with bangs.

30. What else should I write here? I don't know.

3 1, 8,000 meters, and the coast is seven centimeters blue. Who cares if your heart is as deep as the sea?

32, three feet of freezing is not a cold day, and three layers of the lower abdomen are not a cold day.

33. Actually, I used to be quite tall, but later I often took a shower and shrunk.

34. I broke up once and said that I had a stomachache.

35. Love that is often hard to remember usually has no good result.

36, the official amulet: eat and drink without accepting gifts or accepting bribes, like the new and hate the old, romantic and not dirty.

37. Men like obedient women, but when men like a woman, they will listen to her unconsciously.

38. spread soy sauce all over the world and make others jealous.

39, heartless, can live a hundred years old, have a clear conscience, not tired.

It's not him that I can't forget, but my feelings for him.

4 1, the heaviest topic between men is talking about their women.

42. I am deceiving myself, but I refuse to get out of that memory.

43. I am not RMB. How can I make everyone like me? .

44. What the RMB should do is to follow the path of the US dollar, leaving the US dollar with no way out.

45. A good horse doesn't eat grass when he turns around, because there is no grass when he turns around.

46. I thought I was decadent, and I didn't know that my morning paper was scrapped until today.

47. I don't know music, so sometimes it's unreliable and sometimes it's out of tune.

I smiled. He said, this is what I want to tell you.

49. Mom says he is not suitable for you. I said I liked him, then I dumped him. Because I listen to my mother.

50. Dare to curse me for eating instant noodles without seasoning packets, and I curse you for eating instant noodles with seasoning packets.

5 1. Why do girls have no status? When I was a child, I entered my father's account, and when I grew up, I entered my husband's account, just like transferring money!

52, as far as I'm concerned, I'm also an educated hooligan!

53. Don't be infatuated with elder brother, because elder brother is just a legend. Don't be infatuated with elder sister, she will make you vomit blood after removing makeup.

54. If you say that your hands are short, you will be paraplegic.

55. I gradually began to understand that my life is accompanied by myself.

56. The dim light illuminates the pale face, and you leave in scarlet eyes.

57. I heard that it was so hot that you hit it on Tanabata.

58. Prices are in line with Europe, house prices are in line with the moon and wages are in line with Africa. ...

59, I can't do that kind of action, ugly wow, such a big action, I brought a single tube. ...

60. There are fewer people crossing the street with grandma and more people crossing the street with mistresses.

6 1, happiness is not just talk, love is not talk.

62. Your story is like a short story in a campus magazine. They won't last.

63. In the face of facts, the more developed our imagination is, the more disastrous the consequences will be.

64. Half of life is bad luck, and the other half is dealing with bad things.

65. Run with tears and fall luxuriantly.

66. The faded scenery is only a cursory look.

You are not the only woman in the world, but there is only one woman like you.

68. There is always a casual shadow, which is a dream that you have been trying to accomplish all your life.

Rain God Rain God, come to my house and give us a heavy rain.

I didn't leave my grandfather here, but I have my own place. I won't leave you anywhere and go home to do housework.

7 1, carve loneliness on the bottle, drink it into the bladder, pee it out, and let loneliness spill all over the floor!

When you put on the wedding dress of love, I also put on the monk's cassock. ...

73. Maturity is not the aging of the heart, but the smile with tears in your eyes.

74. I said: Because this is the only time I can vent! Ah ha ha ...

75. The hearts of employers and employees are also made of meat. You think it's stainless steel and waterproof.

76. I am a humble sand, walking with the wind. I'm sophisticated and complicated.

77, implicated in our happiness and happiness, this is what we really want to cherish.

78, men are used to rely on, so be reliable; Women are meant to love, so be cute.

79. I am a civilized person, and all the dirty words have been disinfected with saliva.

80. I should be a person of status. I should be a strong person. I should be alone, not such a tramp.

Take stock of the network classic teasing quotations 2 1. It turns out that as long as people are separated, people who are familiar with each other will gradually alienate.

2. Real good friends are not together with endless topics, but together, even if they don't talk, they won't feel embarrassed.

3. Time is for wandering, body is for loving, life is for forgetting, and soul is for singing.

No one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

5. After reading the language of 10, it is better to talk about QQ for half a year.

The important task of post-80s is to make post-80s.

7. I have a little thought, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

8. Gold always shines, but when there is gold everywhere, I don't know which one I am.

9. Let ten men and one woman go crazy on the island. Three months later, I saw men make a sedan chair and take women to play. That woman is charming and charming, and her face is like a peach blossom! Ten more women and a man were released on the island. Three months later, they saw women around a coconut tree, some throwing stones and some fiddling with the fruit. That man is as thin as a monkey. If he holds on to the tree, he won't come down.

10, flowers often do not belong to people who appreciate flowers, but to cow dung.

1 1, the difference between people and pigs is that pigs have always been pigs, but people are sometimes not people!

12, it's not that the ending of the story is not good enough, but that we are too demanding of the story!

13, everyone thinks they are stock gods, speculating one to earn another, and even the aunt who sells onions in the small market said: I have news!

14, it's not difficult to be single, but it's difficult to deal with those who try their best to make you end being single.

15, go to the pizza shop to buy pizza! The waiter asked me whether to cut it into 8 pieces or 12 pieces. I thought about it and said: 8 yuan! 12 can't eat!

16. The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously.

17, even if you are already taken, I will move you to my side.

18, thanks to my fat body, I can pinch my stomach when I am sad.

19, sometimes, it's not that the other person doesn't care about you, but that you take the other person too seriously.