Humorous sentences that amuse oneself.

Humorous sentences that amuse oneself (40 selected sentences) 1. Say that money is evil and everyone fishes; Say beauty is a disaster, everyone wants it; It is said that the height is too cold and everyone is climbing; Say that alcohol and tobacco hurt the body and don't quit; Say heaven is the best, no one goes! Hmm? What else can I believe? I am always cold during exams. When others are arguing whether the answer is A or B, I can't figure out why I chose C.3. Tell parents: Please don't scold children. Little bastard? Because from a genetic point of view, it is very bad for you. Everyone used to call me poor diaosi, short, poor and frustrated, short, fat and ugly. Today, I know that I can have a more appropriate name-dohihara! 5. Women should learn to cherish themselves, learn to dress themselves up, don't use simplicity as a shield, don't use housework as an excuse, and don't understand fashion. You are not a complete woman. 6. I thought? Invisible? People can't find me. It's no use. People like me, like fireflies in the dark, are bright enough and outstanding enough. 7. The beauty of learning lies in confusing people; The beauty of poetry lies in inciting men and women to cheat; The beauty of a woman lies in being stupid without regrets; The beauty of a man is that he speaks during the day. 8. Rich people have no talent; Talented people have no money. After years of hard work, I found the unity of the two! I have neither money nor talent. 9. I see vicissitudes in your brow, confidence in your eyes, years on your forehead and leeks between your lips and teeth. Go brush your teeth! 10. The sky is blue, the sea is deep, and nothing a person says is true; Love is eternal, blood is bright red, and it is impossible for a man not to fight; If a man has money, it is destined to be everyone's! 1 1. Bees chase butterflies, but butterflies marry snails. The bee doesn't understand: where is he better than me? Butterfly replied: people at least have their own house, unlike you who live in a dormitory. 12. Men can't find a girlfriend, so they can only tell their fortune. Fortune teller: You are doomed to have no women in the first half of your life. The man's eyes lit up: what about the second half? The fortune teller said: You will get used to it for the rest of your life. 13. It's no use telling you how many times to complain. Give me a hug. 14. You must have eaten something dazzling. Otherwise, why do you keep moving in my heart and make me miss you? I can't stop. 15. I heard that liking is contagious. Please come near me. 16. wangwang crushed ice, you are my half, and you are my other half. 17. You don't have to worry about whether we are suitable or not. I am versatile. 18. There are many people who like you, and there is no shortage of me. I like very few people, except you. 19. You are excellent, but you have a fatal flaw: lack of me. Stop it, there is nothing to talk about between you and me except love. 2 1. When you ignore me, I feel that you are studying hard and preparing to support me in the future. 22. I think you are really not a qualified friend. You'd better change to my wife! 23. I don't want to go to Jianghu, I want to break into a girl's heart. 24. I don't want to hit the south wall. I want to hit my husband in the chest. 25. Just like touching porcelain in a car accident, I can't afford to sit on you after colliding with you in a sea of people. 26. I accidentally let it go? I love you? I sent it to you by mistake. If you accept it, keep it. If you don't accept it, send these three words back to me. 27. Don't tell me to get old. I also want to dye my hair. 28. Don't be polite to me. Sooner or later, it will be your account. 29. I'm not nice to you without money and power. Can you follow me? 30. I have three incorrect views, all of which are biased towards you. 3 1. Don't puppy love. What you are talking about now is someone else's future husband or wife. Young people don't care much about their health. The disease will always get sick and die. A lot of work usually kills you. I don't need anything now except my boyfriend. As long as you can help me, you can get a girlfriend for free. 34. If you think I'm fat, just say so, don't beat around the bush. You really took it one step at a time, didn't you? 35. The police dealt with the suspect for more than two hours. Finally, both of them were driven off the merry-go-round by the administrator. I never envy people who drive luxury cars, because my car is more expensive than theirs. That's the shopping cart my wife gave me! 37. My emotions can be roughly divided into four categories: eating too much, sleeping too much, thinking too much and spending too much. 38. If marriage is the grave of love, then blind date is to show feng shui to the grave, confession is to dig the grave, marriage is double suicide, empathy is to move the grave, and the third party is to rob the grave! The teacher said that if you don't study hard now, you will fill in the blanks in the future. Study hard now, and you will find multiple-choice questions later! 40. They are goddesses and glow. And I'm just a female nerve, reflecting light.