A particularly interesting and funny copy

1. If my life is made into a movie of 1, then I've already decided on the name of the movie, and it's called Poor 1 Life.

There was a kissing scene on TV, and the father asked his son to pour a glass of water. Soon, there was a kissing scene on TV. Dad asked his son to pour another glass of water. The son asked, Dad, are you thirsty at the sight of someone kissing?

3. What kind of man do you like? I like men who are radiant when they smile. -You mean Tathagata?

4. I am not good at pregnancy, but I am good at pregnancy myself!

I can't find a girlfriend, so I have to tell my fortune. Fortune teller: Your first half life is doomed to be unattractive. My eyes lit up: what about the second half? Fortune teller: I'll get used to it for the rest of my life.

Modern people keep saying that they don't like to make phone calls, but in fact, they just can't find anyone to make phone calls. Look through your phone records, only advertisements, promotions and express delivery.

7. Q: What do turtles and rabbits have in common in the tortoise-rabbit race? A: It's good for your health. Everything is delicious.

8. My mobile phone rang, and my mother answered it-Tong Yuan, shouting: Come and answer the phone, there is a monk looking for you!

9. When I was shopping, the security guard at the door called me, "Wait a minute, what's in your bulging clothes?" I lifted my coat angrily and shouted, "it's meat, it's meat!" My own. "

10. You only need a red envelope to make a dead group come alive. Let a living group die, only need a class teacher.

1 1. The class teacher said, "If you want to learn a course well, you must stick to it like chasing someone!" I interrupted him and said, "Then try chasing eight at the same time."

12. Buy a new mobile phone and unlock the screen with facial recognition. Sometimes the failure of unlocking tells me that the face matching is unsuccessful, and I can accept it. Sometimes it is not an exaggeration to say that no face is detected!

13. At present, there are four kinds of men who are most popular with women: Gao Fushuai, short, Gao Fushuai, tall, rich, ugly, short, rich and ugly.

14. I once fantasized about saving the world when I grew up. When I grow up, I find that the world can't save me, and it ignores me!

15. I didn't know what I said was so valuable until I paid the phone bill.

16. I asked my wife why she is a wife? Second-rate wife replied: you are a bitch, I am your wife, referred to as wife! Is that how it is explained?

17. I was on the road with my wife at night and found 5 yuan on the road. My wife said that the money I found must be spent, otherwise it would bring bad luck. I'm dubious. As a result, she dragged me into the supermarket and bought more than 200 snacks.

18. Just out of the community gate this morning, a five-or six-year-old girl hugged my thigh and cried and said, Uncle, marry me! I was in a mess when I suddenly heard a voice behind me saying, even if you get married, you have to go to school today!

19. Eat mala Tang. The boss said that his mala Tang was divided into five grades: slightly spicy, moderately spicy, spicy, unusually spicy, and the next day's buttocks hurt.

20. Forgive me for dressing up, holding a fountain pen, frowning and writing hard, just to get to the bottom of Xueba.

2 1. I am a person who is extremely opposed to domestic violence, but after I got married, I found that this is not my decision.

22. The most exclusive thing in the world is homework. No matter how you ignore it, it will still follow you.

23. I was very happy to send a circle of friends on the first day of employment: "I found a new job today, come on!" The friend replied, "Which gas station can offer a discount?"

24. At this age, it's embarrassing. Half of my friends have become parents, and the other half are so drunk that they don't even know their parents every day.