The complete works of humorous jokes in one sentence

Humor is the expression of excess intelligence, and jokes are its perfect expression. A world without jokes is not a perfect world. Next, I carefully prepared a one-sentence humorous joke for you. Welcome to watch!

A humorous joke.

1. An American lawyer insured his cigar against fire! The insurance company really underwrites it. As a result, the lawyer took the insurance company to court on the grounds that cigars worth 1.5 million dollars were burned by "small fire". The judge ruled against the insurance company. After losing the case, the insurance company immediately arrested the lawyer for "suspected 24 cases of intentional arson". All the testimony was provided by the lawyer himself. In the end, the lawyer was sentenced to 24 months in prison and fined $25,000.

2. sihui east station managed to grab a seat on the subway 1 line, and an old man got up in sihui station, so he got up and gave up his seat. As a result, a sister sat down next to her. Angry: This is for the old man. My sister ignored me and just bowed her head and played with her mobile phone. Helpless turn around, silently put a stuffy fart on her.

3. The release date of Titanic in Chinese mainland:1March 28th, 998. China State Administration of Radio, Film and Television was established on June 25th, 1998. So "why didn't SARFT delete Ruth's dew point shot at that time, but now it's not SARFT's fault".

There is a jealous woman who searches for her husband every day. Whenever she finds a hair of another woman, she will cry loudly. Once she searched for a long time and found nothing, so she cried even harder. She pointed at her husband and cursed: Well, I didn't expect you to let go of the nun now.

Wang, the host of Happy Dictionary, interviewed a program audience and asked, "Who is your favorite hostess?" The audience said, "It's you." Wang asked, "Why do you say that?" The audience said, "Because you look a bit like Yang Lan!"

6. in the homework "my favorite family members", my son mentioned grandpa, grandma, mom and grandma like a genealogy ... but in the end, he changed his pen and wrote: "who does my family like best? I'm sure you've guessed, of course it's my father. Others are very strict with me, only my father is the best ... "I was elated, but I turned to the next page and saw two words written at the beginning of the first line-bullying.

7. Dad asked his son, "Do you love Dad or Mom best?" My son loves everything. Unwilling, my father asked, "If I go to America and my mother goes to Paris, where will you go?" "Paris." Why? The son replied, "Paris is beautiful." . Dad asked again, "Then I will go to Paris and my mother will go to America?" "Of course, go to the United States. "The son answered naturally, and the father said sadly," Why do you always follow your mother? " The son looked calm: "Paris has just been there"!

8. My dad once received a phone call, and the other party said a lot of nonsense, which confused my dad. My dad got angry and said, "Who are you?" What happened? Is it a "wrong number"? This guy is angrier than my dad. He said, "What's the matter? What happened? I just charged you 100. You can talk to me for a while. What's wrong? " ?

9. Found a bottle of expired toner at home. I searched on the Internet: "How can the toner be used as a waste product when it has expired?" Jump out of the best answer: to my husband.

10. The reporter interviewed an old lady in the street. Reporter: "Talk about the influence of windy weather on your life". Old lady: "I'll go, that will affect the boss." Let's go shopping with my dad today ... Emma, where's my old man? " ! . . . "

One sentence, humorous jokes, classics

1. "Mom, from now on, I will do my own homework and never copy others'! ""Oh, baby, you finally understand that mom is proud of you! ""who told them to write so scribbled, I can't copy it! "

2. A classmate saw a statue of a female soldier while visiting Yuhuatai Memorial Hall, and then grabbed the chest of a statue with his hand! ! Then, the statue moved. . .

3. I saw my husband playing ipad ... I rubbed up to him and asked him. "Husband, am I your sen?" "Oh ... you are my ipad" I am very happy. "So you can hold me in the palm of your hand, right O∩_∩O" "No ..." "Is it Sen ... o _ o" "It's front and back ..."

4. Wukong heard that iPhone4S was a rarity, so he flew to America to buy it, and then harassed Master every day. On this day, I called the Tang Priest again, but suddenly I dropped my brand-new mobile phone on the ground. Wukong swore, "Tang Priest, you are a dead pervert. The bell is set as a spell."

Mom saw dad rummaging through everything and asked Xiaozhen, "What is your dad looking for?" Xiaozhen said doubtfully, "I don't know. Maybe I'm looking for you, or maybe I'm looking for grandma." Mom was puzzled, and Xiaozhen went on to say, "Because he said grandma's while looking for it, * * * is not easy to find."

6. A man has a girlfriend who loves money very much. It can be said that he loves money more than him. So one day, a man finally couldn't stand the explosion and roared at his girlfriend: You greedy woman smells like copper. Just like your father, I'm really tired of denying people money. When anonymous heard this, he immediately flew into a rage, lifted his legs and rested on his hips in one go, pointing at his boyfriend and swearing: TMD, I tell you, you can insult my dad, but you can't insult me. ...

7. The 3D nude scene of Titanic was deleted. What happened to this society? ! I didn't wait 15 years to see any three-dimensional iceberg! /kloc-In Titanic, which was released 0/5 years ago, the scene where Jack sketched Ruth naked was not cut. The 3D version of "Tai" was shown in various cities a few days ago, and some viewers found that the dew point lens was missing.

8. After the two mice got married, the mother mouse became more and more arrogant. One night, the male mouse wanted to scare her, so he went to the door to learn to meow. The wife was not only not afraid, but also said softly, "Mao Ge, stop screaming, my husband hasn't gone on a business trip yet."

9. I am older, unmarried and female. That day, my brother suddenly said to me, "I think my old age must be very miserable." I asked curiously why? He said: "as long as others support my parents, I have to raise an extra sister!" "

10. On the mountain road, a car approached, and at the entrance of the roadside temple, a young monk held high the banner of "returning to the shore" and shouted: Look here, benefactor! A young man in the car criticized through the window: * *! Turn away in an instant. 10 seconds later, he collapsed and fell screaming. That night, in the meditation room, the young monk said to the abbot, Master, wouldn't it be better to just write "The bridge ahead is broken"?

A selection of humorous jokes in one sentence

1. A buddy is a little stupid. He became a policeman after graduating from college. Some time ago, he caught a pyramid scheme leader. The old policeman doesn't want to be tried. Because the evidence was conclusive, he let the buddy go. As a result, he disappeared with the suspect in the middle of the night Later, when I brought the man back, I realized that the goods were actually persuaded by the leaders of MLM. ...

2. A buddy doesn't have a girlfriend. We asked him what he wanted. The buddy said, "This girl has to be a pig." I asked him why, and my buddy said, "I'm a monkey. If I find a girl who is a pig like Pig Bajie and the Monkey King, she will be afraid of me. "

3. Going to a restaurant for dinner, a buddy happily ordered a turtle soup and was about to drink it. The girlfriend said, "Yes, the turtle wants soup." Everyone sprayed rice ... Soon, the tortoise finished eating, but unexpectedly, there were several turtle eggs under the tortoise, and they were not too embarrassed to eat. So I said to the waiter, "waiter, share this." Who ever wanted him to say, "How to divide it? There are six of you and five bastards ... "Everyone is dizzy.

When I was waiting in line to pay for clothes with my wife, she took out cash. I saw many beautiful women around me, so I took out my husband's generosity, took out my wallet and a credit card: "I'll swipe my card!" " The wife glanced at the girls around her and replied, "I'd better come and let your wife know how bad it is!" " "

5. Q: How to comfort female basin friends with dysmenorrhea? A: What does my husband accompany at this time ~ My husband hugs you ~ My husband sings for you ~ My husband cooks brown sugar water for you ~ It's all light! It should be said: "You pinch your husband's penis and let him accompany you in pain."

6. When a girl says she wants to lose weight, don't believe it, especially eating. Because when she said this, she had just eaten.

7. One day, my wife came home and said happily to her husband, "I read my palm today. The man said that my second husband was handsome, knowledgeable, rich and gentle. " The husband said in surprise, "So, you were married once? I haven't heard you say it. "

8. It is said that people with good Chinese are generally literate, people with good history are generally knowledgeable, people with good geography are generally cautious, people with good English are generally cheerful, people with good biology are generally smart, people with good physics are generally smart, people with good chemistry are generally optimistic, people with good sports are generally brave, people with good politics are generally persistent, people with good computers are generally fashionable, and people with good mathematics are generally abnormal.

9. 100 years ago, a Bai and her rich * * went to the United States by boat, and they met a diaosi on the way and were successfully seduced by her. Later, the ship hit an iceberg, and Silk died, but Fu managed to escape. -"Titanic" tells us a truth: Dig a corner and die a natural death.

10. A piece of news said that HTC blocked the robber's bullet and saved the owner's life. Someone posted it downstairs and replied coldly: If we use Nokia, the bullets will bounce back and kill the robbers. God replied: if we use our cottage machine, we can not only block the bullets back, but also shoot automatically and identify the gangsters intelligently! During the period, the background music of the moon and the most dazzling national style have been played.

A humorous joke